“Thanks guys, you’re all great friends too, even when I don’t understand me!”
"谢谢你们，你们也都是好朋友，即使在我不了解自己的时候!"
“What am I afraid of? Seriously? I’ve seen some real fucked-up shit around the Wasteland. I’ve seen foals bought, sold, and rented. I’ve seen monsters tear a pony to pieces. I’ve seen ghouls crawling out of the earth. But, for the most part, I’ve never been afraid of it. I’m usually more ‘oh fuck, this is gonna hurt’, than ‘I’m afraid’.
""我怕什么？真的吗？我在荒原附近见过一些真正的垃圾。我见过小马驹被买卖出租。我见过怪物把小马撕成碎片。我见过食尸鬼从地里爬出来。但是，在大多数情况下，我从来没有害怕过。我通常会说'哦，妈的，这会很疼'，而不是'我很害怕'。
“You want fear? Fear is being strapped to a table as a permanent lunch for a bunch of cannibals. Knowing they’re going to rip you apart and eat you over… and over… and over again. Fear is knowing you might spend years or centuries that way, your flesh fueling the nightmare and you helpless to stop it.
"你想要恐惧吗？恐惧正被绑在一张桌子上，成为一群食人族的永久午餐。知道他们会把你撕成碎片，一遍又一遍地吃掉你。恐惧是知道你可能会以这种方式花费数年或数个世纪，你的肉体助长了噩梦，而你无力阻止它。
“But even that’s nothing. You want real fear? Fear is not knowing. Fear is looking at the future and knowing that something bad is hidden in it. And the greatest fear of all is knowing that the something bad might be you.
"但即使这样也没什么。你想要真正的恐惧？恐惧是不知道。恐惧就是看着未来，知道不好的事情隐藏在其中。最大的恐惧就是知道坏事可能就是你自己。
“I’d rather take a dive through a dragon’s digestive tract than face that.”
"我宁愿潜入龙的消化道，也不愿意面对它。"
* * *
* * *
Okay. Four Zodiacs. One of them was a heavy mech, the zebra probably had dangerous sniping skills, and I anticipated some sort of deadly diversity from the bow-wielder. The pegasus… eh, I had nothing. Poisons on the needles? On our side, I was unarmed, my horn wasn’t working, my legs weren’t working, Rampage was a filly, and Scotch, P-21, and Lacunae were unarmed. Well, only one thing to do.
好吧。四个黄道带。其中一个是一个重型机甲，斑马可能有危险的狙击技能，我预计一些致命的多样性从弓箭使用者。飞马...我什么都没有。针上的毒药？在我们这边，我没有武器，我的喇叭坏了，我的腿也不能动了，狂暴是匹小母马，苏格兰人，P-21，还有陷阱都没有武器。好吧，只有一件事要做。
“Rampage! On the zebra! Lacunae, arrows on the big guy! P-21, use whatever you have hidden on the pegasus! Scotch, find Glory! Arrows is mine!” And with
"横冲直撞！在斑马上！陷阱，箭在大家伙身上！P-21，用你在飞马号上藏的东西！苏格兰人，找到晨辉！箭是我的!"还有
a battle cry, I snatched an eating utensil from the table in my teeth and lunged towards the bow-wielding green unicorn.
我咬着牙从桌上抓起一个餐具，冲向那只挥舞着弓箭的绿色独角兽。
Nopony moved as I flopped on my belly with my mouth set determinedly around my weapon. “Ell chut yer eart oot!” I swore as I swung my head wildly in his general direction. Everypony just stared in shock as I wiggled towards him. Then Triage’s magic enveloped me, and I was lifted into the air and dangled in front of her as if held by the scruff of my neck.
当我趴在地上，嘴巴紧紧地环绕着武器的时候，小马动了起来。"噢，你的耳朵!"我一边咒骂，一边朝他大致的方向使劲摇头。当我向他扭动身体时，每个小马都震惊地盯着我。然后分诊的魔法包围了我，我被举到空中，在她面前晃来晃去，好像被我的颈背抓住了。
“The Collegiate is the home of the Zodiacs, you half-horned idiot!” the grey medical pony told me firmly and with just a hint of exasperation. “How do you think we get the caps to keep this place running? Trust me, sickly ponies are not cash makers!” I glared at her, my teeth tightening on the weapon’s handle, and she looked at me a little uneasily. “And take that spoon out of your mouth!”
"学院是十二宫的家，你这个半角的白痴!"那匹灰色的医用小马坚定地告诉我，带着一丝恼怒。"你觉得我们怎么才能让这个地方运转起来呢？相信我，病怏怏的小马可赚不了钱!"我瞪着她，紧咬着枪柄的牙齿，她有点不安地看着我。"把勺子从你嘴里拿出来!"
I spat it right in her face as hard as I could, and the impact distracted her just enough to break her magic’s hold. Lacunae’s purple glow immediately enveloped me, and I threw my forelegs around Triage’s neck, pressing my horn to her throat. “Now my horn may be… compact, but I bet it’s long enough to hit one of those vein thingies in your neck. And since you saved my life like, three times, it’d be really shitty to kill you, but I’m not going anywhere with them. So. Zodiacs leave. We get our gear. We get Glory if she’s feeling better and... wants to come. Then, and only then, will I meet this professor.” I felt her swallow.
我用尽全力朝她脸上吐了一口唾沫，那冲击力刚好分散了她的注意力，打破了她的魔法。陷阱的紫色光芒立刻包围了我，我用前腿搂住分诊医生的脖子，用角抵住她的喉咙。"现在我的号角可能......很小巧，但我敢打赌，它的长度足以打中你脖子上的一根静脉。既然你救了我三次，杀了你真的很糟糕，但我不会跟他们去任何地方。所以。十二宫杀手离开了。我们拿到我们的装备。如果她感觉好点了，想来的话，我们就能得到晨辉。到那时，也只有到那时，我才能见到这位教授。"我感觉到她在吞咽。
For a tense moment, I hung there, wondering just how big a mess this would be if somepony said ‘no’. Then the security bot said in a tinny mare’s voice, “Please back down, Sagittarius. I believe that Security will come see me now in good faith.” The security bot’s metal head turned towards me. “Correct, Blackjack?”
在一个紧张的时刻，我挂在那里，想着如果有人说"不"，事情会变得多糟糕。然后保安机器人用嘶哑的母马的声音说:"请退后，射手座。我相信保安现在会诚心诚意地来见我。"保安机器人的金属头转向我。"对吗，黑杰克?"
I glanced up at the indentation my horn was making on the paralyzed Triage and didn’t dare nod. “Sure.”
我抬头看了看我的角在瘫痪的伤检分类中造成的凹痕，不敢点头。"当然。"
The green unicorn had an arrow trained right at my eye, but he couldn’t be sure I wouldn’t take Triage with me. Then he nodded once, and the four carefully backed out of the cafeteria. “Go get our things, Rampage. P-21, check on Glory,” I said as I hovered there in Lacunae’s magic. If the Zodiacs tried something, they’d have the best chances of surviving and evading. “Got me, Lacunae?”
绿色的独角兽有一支箭正对着我的眼睛，但他不能确定我是否会带着伤检分类法一起走。然后他点了点头，四个人小心翼翼地退出了餐厅。"去拿我们的东西，狂暴。"P-21，检查一下晨辉,"我说，此时我正用拉库尼的魔法盘旋在那里。如果黄道带居民尝试了什么，他们最有可能生存下来并逃避。"抓到我了，拉库尼?"
“Easily. Though I feel obliged to point out that, typically, heroes do not take doctors that have repeatedly saved their lives hostage,” the purple alicorn said
"很容易。虽然我觉得有必要指出，通常情况下，英雄不会把多次拯救他们生命的医生当作人质
wryly. “The Goddess does not know if she should be impressed or disappointed.” Or concerned, but she didn’t add that one out loud.
挖苦地。"女神不知道她是该感动还是该失望。"或者担心，但她没有大声说出来。
Triage didn’t say a word till my friends returned. “I couldn’t find Glory,” P-21 informed me as they dumped my gear on the table. “Dusk and the other one are gone too,” he continued, clearly worried about how I’d take this news. To be honest, I didn’t like it, but I couldn’t help Glory myself. Ever since meeting me, her life had been one painful mistake after another. If Dusk could get her back to the Enclave, good.
在我的朋友回来之前，分诊医生一句话也没说。"我找不到晨辉,"P-21通知我，他们把我的装备扔在桌子上。"黄昏和另一个也不见了,"他继续说，显然是担心我会怎么看待这个消息。说实话，我不喜欢这样，但是我不能控制自己的晨辉。自从遇见我，她的生活就是一个又一个痛苦的错误。如果黄昏能把她带回飞地，那很好。
Wasn’t like I was going to be around much longer anyway.
反正我也活不了多久了。
Now that I had guns, barding, and leg braces, I released Triage. She staggered back, rubbed her throat with her hoof, and stared at me in shock. “You… you would have killed me?”
既然我已经有了枪支、抵押品和腿部支架，我就放弃了伤检分类。她摇摇晃晃地往后退，用蹄子摩擦着喉咙，震惊地盯着我。"你...你会杀了我吗?"
“Dunno. Maybe,” I replied as Lacunae buckled the braces onto my limbs. I looked at her shocked and hurt expression and pointed to the scar on my chest. “You see that? Leo Zodiac did that. Aries burned me. Heck, even that Virgo mare used hostages to try and kill me. That’s beside the dozens of ponies I’ve had shooting at me for a bounty! So, having four trot in on me like that was not good. Once my friend was okay, you might have pointed out that I needed to talk to the professor. No problem. Like to meet her. But springing four Zodiacs on me was not a smart move.” Lacunae helped me strap the barding on over my braces. “Be glad that it didn’t go bad.”
"不知道。也许吧,"我回答道，同时Lacunae扣紧了我的支架。我看着她震惊和痛苦的表情，指着我胸口的伤疤。"你看到了吗？十二宫杀手就是这么做的。白羊座封杀了我。甚至那匹处女座母马也用人质试图杀死我。那是在我为了一笔赏金而向我射击的几十匹小马旁边！所以，像这样跑到我面前可不是什么好事。一旦我的朋友没事了，你可能会指出我需要和教授谈谈。没问题。我想见见她。但是在我身上放四个黄道带并不是明智之举。"拉库尼帮我把护身符绑在背带上。"庆幸事情没有变糟。"
“Still… I can’t believe that you did that,” Triage muttered, flushing.
"不过......我还是不敢相信你这么做了,"伤员分类小组咕哝着，脸红了。
I wasn’t feeling very sympathetic at the moment. “In case you didn’t notice, ponies try and kill me a lot. You didn’t take me seriously, so I grabbed what leverage I could.” And you’re a bit of a nag, I added mentally. “Yeah, I help ponies. Yeah, DJ Pon3 thinks I’m a hero. Me? I’m just Blackjack. And I’ll do whatever I have to against any enemy to survive and save my friends.”
我当时并不觉得很有同情心。"你可能没注意到，小马经常想要杀了我。你没有把我当回事，所以我尽可能地利用这一点。"你有点唠叨，我在心里补充道。"是的，我帮助小马。是的，DJPon3认为我是个英雄。我？我只是黑杰克。为了生存和拯救我的朋友，我将不惜一切代价对抗任何敌人。"
Triage actually smiled. “That’s the first sensible thing I think I’ve heard you say.” Getting approval from Triage was certainly a mixed sensation. Sort of like Scalpel telling me ‘good job’.
伤检分类法居然笑了。"这是我听你说过的第一句明智的话。"得到伤检分类法的批准当然是一种复杂的感觉。有点像手术刀告诉我干得好。
Armed and armored, the five of us walked out. I might not have been a smart pony, but I was nopony’s fool.
全副武装，我们五个人走了出去。我也许不是一匹聪明的小马，但我不是小马的傻瓜。
* * *
* * *
Clearly, my treatment of Triage hadn’t endeared me to the Collegiate, but I was in little mood to worry about that. Finding out these ponies had sent the Zodiacs after my head didn’t endear them to me, and while I was grateful for their doctors saving my life and the lives of my friends, I wasn’t going to roll over for them.
显然，我对分诊的处理方式并没有让我受到学院派的欢迎，但是我没有心情去担心这个。虽然我很感激他们的医生救了我的命和我朋友的命，但我不会为他们打滚。
The planetarium was on the northeast corner of the complex, a huge, heavy concrete building topped by a massive dome. The Zodiacs, with the flaming red Aries in her power armor, the blue Aquarius colt, and a soft pink unicorn mare, presumably Virgo, wearing a PipBuck were in attendance. I looked at the first Zodiac I’d ever encountered; she looked the same age as Scotch! Back outside Miramare, I hadn’t realized I’d almost shot a filly. I’d been more concerned with the color on my E.F.S. back then.
天文馆位于建筑群的东北角，是一个巨大的、沉重的混凝土建筑，顶部是一个巨大的圆顶。黄道带上，穿着力量盔甲的火红色白羊座，蓝色的宝瓶座小马，和一匹柔和的粉红色独角兽母马，大概是处女座，穿着一匹匹匹克。我看了看我遇到的第一个十二宫杀手;她看起来和苏格兰人一样大！回到米拉马雷以外的地方，我没有意识到我差点射杀了一匹小母马。那时候我更关心我的e.f.s的颜色。
As we stepped inside the heavy structure, Scotch Tape balked. “We’re… we’re not going underground, are we?” Panic rapidly spread across her features as she looked around the foyer; with the heavy gray walls, it looked a lot like we already were.
当我们走进厚重的建筑物时，透明胶带卡住了。"我们...我们不会转入地下，对吧?"当她环顾门厅的时候，恐慌迅速蔓延到了她的脸上;沉重的灰色墙壁让她看起来很像我们已经在这里了。
“Relax, Scotch,” I said, smiling at her. She didn’t, but she continued with us.
"放松点，苏格兰人,"我对她微笑着说。她没有，但她继续和我们在一起。
The green unicorn, now without his bow, greeted me with a challenging stare. His eyes took in my weapons; I supposed we’d have to leave them behind to meet this professor. Instead, he looked at Taurus’s rifle. “I heard you killed Gem, Mini, and Taurus,” he said gravely. “Is that true?”
绿色的独角兽，现在没有他的弓，迎接我与挑战性的凝视。他的眼睛吸收了我的武器;我想我们得把它们留下来见这位教授。相反，他看着金牛座的步枪。"我听说你杀了宝石、米妮和金牛座,"他严肃地说。"这是真的吗?"
The question took me by surprise. I could still hear Gem pleading her twin to ‘go ghosty’. “The Reaper Deus killed Taurus. Mini died in an accident. Gem killed herself to kill Deus,” I replied softly. “I would have killed them if I had to. They were after my head, after all.”
这个问题使我大吃一惊。我仍然可以听到宝石恳求她的双胞胎'变成幽灵'。"死神杀死了金牛座。米妮死于一场事故。宝石自杀杀死了天王,"我轻声回答。"如果有必要，我会杀了他们。毕竟，他们是冲着我的头来的。"
“They were after your PipBuck. Sure, they might have been a little... intense... about getting it, but they weren’t after the bounty,” he explained with a little shrug. “Virgo was the only one after the money; she didn’t understand why you were different from the others. Kid’s a prodigy, but damn thick sometimes.” He took a deep breath. “We were just wondering. We didn’t know.” With that, he turned and led us up some concrete stairs. We passed a two-century-old display: ‘Explore the constellations! Get your free temporary magic zodiac cutie mark
"他们是冲着你的皮伯克来的。当然，他们可能有点...紧张...想要得到它，但他们不是为了赏金,"他耸了耸肩解释说。"处女座是唯一一个追求金钱的人，她不明白为什么你和其他人不同。这孩子是个天才，但有时候很笨。"他深吸了一口气。"我们只是想知道。我们不知道。"说完，他转过身来，带我们上了一些水泥楼梯。我们经过一个有两个世纪历史的展览:"探索星座!"！得到你的免费临时魔法星座小可爱标志
tattoo at the gift shop!’ declared a Twilight Sparkle cutout.
礼品店的纹身宣布了一个紫悦。
“How can you use fillies and colts to collect bounties?” P-21 asked curiously. Rampage did not look happy about that... which was a bit odd to see, considering her current apparent age.
"你怎么能用小雌马和小马来收取赏金呢?"P-21好奇地问。考虑到她目前的外表年龄，这看起来有点奇怪。
“Because they’re willing and able,” he replied evenly. “We don’t use just anypony, and this place needs caps the same as any settlement. And they work. Any village has colts. Aquarius can blend in, get intelligence, drug drinks… kid’s good like that. Gemini was even better getting in and taking down marks. It was a game to those two. Virgo’s more of a special case. She’s a Zodiac because her father’s a Zodiac.” He screwed up his face and added, “Sorta…”
"因为他们愿意而且有能力,"他平静地回答。"我们不仅仅使用任何小马，这个地方需要与任何定居点一样的上限。他们的工作。每个村庄都有小马。水瓶座可以混进去，变聪明，喝毒品......孩子就是这样的。双子座甚至更好地进入和采取下来的分数。对他们俩来说，这就是一场游戏。处女座更像是一个特例。她是十二宫杀手，因为她父亲是十二宫杀手。"他皱起眉头补充道:"算是吧......"
He stopped at a pair of double doors. “Okay. Professor Zodiac is inside. She’s protected, so don’t try and pull something again. She just wants to talk. Alright?”
他在一对双开门前停下来。"好吧。十二宫教授在里面。她是被保护的，所以不要再试图拉什么东西。她只是想谈谈。好吗?"
“I can do talking. I like talking,” I said with a smile. See? Blackjack being the calm, civilized pony. Sagittarius didn’t look particularly convinced.
"我可以说话。我喜欢说话,"我笑着说。看到了吗？黑杰克是一匹平静、文明的小马。射手座看起来并不是特别确信。
The door opened into an immense, domed chamber. I immediately thought of the Reapers’ arena, though this room was still far smaller than that immense space. A dozen tiers ran around the perimeter of the room; some still had black floor cushions scattered on them, but most of them had been removed for the rest of the junk that occupied the space. In the center rose a massive black piece of equipment studded with hundreds of gemstones that twinkled brightly; a large metal cylinder stood next to it. Cables snaked all over the place, and I spotted several pieces of what looked like sand dog bionics. Countless robots, ranging from Protectaponies to sentry bots, stood silently on the tiers and around the edge of the central floor, and, in my amber night vision, I thought I could see a telltale stealth ripple next to one of them.
门打开了，里面是一个巨大的圆顶房间。我立刻想到了死神的竞技场，尽管这个房间比那个巨大的空间要小得多。房间周围有十几层，有些还散落着黑色的地垫，但是大部分已经被清理掉了，只留下剩下的垃圾。中间矗立着一个巨大的黑色设备，上面镶嵌着数百颗闪闪发光的宝石;旁边放着一个巨大的金属圆筒。电缆在这个地方蜿蜒曲折，我发现了一些看起来像沙狗的仿生物碎片。无数的机器人，从Protectaponies到岗哨机器人，静静地站在中央地板的边缘，在我琥珀色的夜视镜里，我想我可以看到它们中的一个旁边有隐形的涟漪。
“I love this part,” Rampage muttered to Scotch Tape. The olive filly shrank away from all of the mechanical devices surrounding us, chewing on her bottom lip and fidgeting with her goggles.
"我喜欢这部分,"狂暴对着透明胶带喃喃自语。这个橄榄色的小姑娘躲开了我们周围所有的机械装置，咬着下嘴唇，摆弄着她的护目镜。
The lights suddenly dimmed, and the massive machine in the center lit up and slowly rose into the air. From the countless gems emerged a million points of light that splashed against the great dome overhead and formed slowly into a starry sky. Unlike the arena’s enchanted ceiling, this projection looked… deeper. Still, I couldn’t help but feel these little motes to be somewhat lame; they just
灯光突然变暗，中间巨大的机器亮了起来，慢慢地升到空中。从无数的宝石中显现出无数的光点，它们在头顶上的巨大圆顶上溅起，慢慢地形成了星空。不像竞技场的魔法天花板，这个投影看起来...更深。尽管如此，我还是忍不住觉得这些小毛球有点蹩脚，它们只是
didn’t match up to those tiny lights I’d seen in Maripony’s memory.
和我在Maripony记忆中看到的那些小灯不一样。
Wait a minute… The stars were moving, slowly, then flying off the ceiling and drawing together into an immense glowing unicorn head floating in the air above the central machine and staring down at us! A booming voice echoed throughout the chamber. “I am the great and powerful Professor Zodiac! Mistress of the Mechanical! Lorekeeper of Legend! Look upon me and tremble!”
等一下......星星在移动，慢慢地，然后从天花板上飞下来，汇聚成一个巨大的发光的独角兽头，漂浮在中央机器上方的空气中，俯视着我们！一个洪亮的声音在整个房间里回荡。"我是伟大而强大的十二生肖教授！机械师的女主人！传奇守护者！看着我，颤抖吧!"
Scotch Tape gave a little shriek and dove under me, shaking as she hugged my hoof. P-21 kept backing up towards the door. Lacunae was staring at the image in mild confusion. Rampage, however, just grinned as she looked up at the starry head. I looked down at Scotch and scowled, then levitated out my shotgun and turned back to the floating head.
透明胶带在我身下发出一声尖叫，俯冲到我身下，紧紧抱住我的蹄子，颤抖着。P-21不断后退到门口。空隙带着轻微的困惑凝视着这幅图像。然而，当她抬头看着这个星光灿烂的脑袋时，狂暴只是咧嘴一笑。我低头看了看苏格兰威士忌，满脸愁容，然后用我的猎枪把它悬浮起来，转身看着那个漂浮的脑袋。
“Yeah? Well I’m Blackjack the tired and annoyed! So turn down the volume and turn up the lights before I start sharing my bad day!” I bellowed up at her as I racked a round into the chamber.
"是吗？我是疲惫而烦恼的黑杰克！所以，在我开始分享我糟糕的一天之前，把音量关小，把灯打开!"我向枪膛里打了一发子弹，对着她大吼大叫。
She blinked in shock, and then the stars almost instantly scattered back into their original positions. The room lights came up a bit, the volume dropped to a normal level, and from the device in the center flickered rainbow beams. They formed into a middle-aged, normal-sized silver mare with glowing white eyes who scowled at Rampage. “You told her, didn’t you?” There was something… off… about her, though, besides her being a glowing, translucent projection. Was it her face? Her tail? She looked… just odd, somehow.
她震惊地眨了眨眼，然后星星几乎立刻散开回到它们原来的位置。房间的灯亮了一点，音量降到了正常水平，中间的设备上闪烁着彩虹光束。她们变成了一匹中年银色母马，体型正常，眼睛闪闪发光，怒视着暴怒。"你告诉她了，是不是?"不过，除了她是一个发光的、半透明的投影之外，她还有一些......不对劲的地方。是她的脸吗？她的尾巴？她看起来...有点奇怪。
Rampage fell back, laughing. “I didn’t say a word. I knew Blackjack wouldn’t fall for the great floaty head of doom routine, Zodiac. That’s fifty caps you owe me!” The ghostly mare snorted, and one of the Protectaponies trotted over to Rampage. A little door opened up, and out tumbled a hoofful of caps. “Here, hold on to these for me, Blackjack,” she said as she dumped them in my bags. I noted that my PipBuck counted only forty-five caps.
狂暴向后退去，大笑着。"我一句话也没说。我知道黑杰克不会爱上伟大的命运之神十二宫杀手。你欠我五十个帽子!"鬼魅般的母马喷着鼻息，其中一只受保护的母马小跑着走向暴怒。一扇小门打开了，一群帽子滚了出来。"给，帮我拿着这些，黑杰克,"她边说边把它们倒进我的包里。我注意到我的皮伯克手枪只有四十五发子弹。
The flickering, ghostly silver mare looked at me and snorted softly. “Fine. Again, without the showmareship. I’m Professor Zodiac, head of the Collegiate. I was hoping to talk to you earlier, but you just trotted right out of here. Wanted a word before you left again.”
那匹闪烁着幽灵般银色的母马看着我，轻轻地哼了一声。"好吧。再说一次，没有表演。我是十二宫杀手教授，学院院长。我本来想早点跟你谈的但你就这么跑出去了。在你离开之前，我想跟你说句话。"
“About what?” I asked sullenly, suspicious of flashy ponies wanting things from me. And I just knew it had to be something to do with the program in my
"谈什么?"我闷闷不乐地问，怀疑那些花里胡哨的小马是不是想从我这里得到什么。我只知道这肯定和我的程序有关
PipBuck.
皮伯克。
“Your bill,” she replied. “We utilized a considerable amount of our limited supplies, time, and resources to restore you and your friends… you in particular,” she said with a grin, pointing a hoof at me, “More than we would have for anypony else. Certainly more than we would have for free.”
"你的账单,"她回答。"我们利用了我们有限的物资、时间和资源，恢复了你和你的朋友，特别是你,"她咧嘴笑着，用蹄子指着我说,"比其他小马要多得多。肯定比我们免费得到的要多。"
“I… I…” I blinked and considered the caps we’d amassed. “How much do you want? I think I can swing a few thousand…”
"我.....。.我。。」我眨了眨眼睛，想着我们收集的那些帽子。"你要多少钱？我想我可以摆动几千......"
“Oh, you used enough healing materials to well exceed that. One trip through the booth costs five thousand caps. So, I think we’re looking at… for the five of you treated… and you, two additional times… plus surgery… healing potions… rejuvenation talismans… time… eh… fifty thousand caps!” she said with a grin. “Rounded down.”
"哦，你使用了足够的治疗材料，远远超过了这个数字。一次通过电话亭的旅行要花费5000美元。所以，我认为我们正在寻找...为你们五个治疗...和你，两个额外的时间...加上手术...治疗药剂...年轻护身符...时间...呃...五万帽子!"她笑着说。"四舍五入。"
My mouth worked silently. Suddenly, I felt like I was back at Megamart with Deus putting a price on my head. “Fifty… fifty thousand…”
我的嘴在默默地工作着。突然间，我感觉自己回到了Megamart，而上帝正在悬赏我的人头。"五十...五万..."
“Oh yes. And that’s not counting hospital time for your friends...” she said as she rubbed her hooves together. “But! I am happy to waive that fee and all future uses of our medical facilities…in exchange for EC-1101.”
"哦，是的。这还不包括你朋友住院的时间......"她一边搓着蹄子一边说。""可是！我很高兴免除这笔费用以及我们医疗设施的所有未来用途......以换取EC-1101。"
I felt my head spin. “What? What do you want it for? Project Chimera?” Of course! With that, she could make all kinds of freaky new pony-things to use as bounty hunters.
我感到头晕目眩。"什么？你要它干什么？奇美拉计划?"当然！有了这个，她可以做出各种各样的怪异的小马——用作赏金猎人的东西。
“Project Chimera? You know about that?” She was momentarily surprised, but then laughed. “What do I look like, a Canterlot ghoul with delusions of grandeur? Don’t be ridiculous.” She shook her head in amusement. “I’m interested in an entirely different project,” she said, then looked at me levelly. “I want Project Steelpony unsealed.”
"奇美拉计划？你知道吗?"她一时感到惊讶，但随后笑了起来。"我看起来像什么，一个拿着自大型妄想的坎特罗食尸鬼吗？别开玩笑了。"她有趣地摇摇头。"我对一个完全不同的项目感兴趣,"她说，然后平静地看着我。"我想让Steelpony项目解封。"
“Ah… excuse me. Question!” Rampage said as she waved her hoof over her head. “What the heck are Project Chimera and Project Steelpony?”
"啊......不好意思。问题!"狂暴女人边说边用蹄子在头上踢来踢去。"Chimera项目和Steelpony项目到底是什么?"
P-21 nodded grimly. “Yeah, I’d kinda like to know that as well.” Lacunae nodded primly, and even Scotch Tape seemed to overcome her worry to look at the glowing unicorn questioningly.
P-21严肃地点了点头。"是的，我也想知道。"拉库奈一本正经地点了点头，就连透明胶带似乎也克服了她疑惑地看着那只发光的独角兽的忧虑。
Professor Zodiac smiled smugly and opened her mouth. “They,” I said, “were secret projects during the war. Project Chimera made Gorgon from a pony named Stonewing and a cockatrice. Project Steelpony made Deus. He was originally a soldier named Doof who was convicted of raping a squadmate.” Four pairs of eyes stared at me in shock. Professor Zodiac’s expression, though, was more intrigued.
黄道带教授得意地笑了笑，张开了嘴。"他们,"我说,"是战争期间的秘密项目。奇美拉计划用一匹名叫石翼的小马和一只鸡尾酒做成了蛇发女怪。项目Steelpony制造Deus。他原来是一个名叫杜夫的士兵，因强奸一个战友而被定罪。"四双眼睛震惊地盯着我。不过，黄道带教授的表情更让人好奇。
“There are perhaps three or four ponies outside this room who know that information,” she murmured softly.
"在这个房间外面，也许有三四匹小马知道这个消息,"她低声说。
My friends were a little less sanguine about it. “You mean you know who made Deus?” P-21 shouted, then waved a hoof at the ghostly pony. “And she wants to be able to make more of him?”
我的朋友们对此没有那么乐观。"你是说你知道是谁创造了天王?"P-21大声叫喊，然后对着幽灵般的小马挥舞着蹄子。"她希望能更多地了解他吗?"
“Gorgon was one of the few Reapers I liked! What do you mean he was made that way? Who? How? Why?!” Rampage demanded as she grabbed my head to look me in the eye.
"戈耳工是我喜欢的少数收割者之一！你是什么意思？谁？怎么做？为什么?!"她抓住我的头看着我的眼睛，狂暴地问道。
“Was that monster in the tunnels from that project stuff?” Scotch Tape asked as she tugged at my leg.
"地道里的那个怪物是从那个项目里来的吗?"透明胶带一边拉我的腿一边问。
“The Goddess wishes an immediate explanation, Blackjack! How is it that you came by this information?” Lacunae said imperiously and in full Goddess mode, despite her expression of discomfort.
"女神希望立刻得到解释，黑杰克！你是怎么得到这些信息的?"尽管她表现出不安的样子，她还是以完全女神的模式傲慢地说。
I looked from one to the next, my head spinning. “Well… I… I must have told you! I mean… didn’t I?” I looked from one to the next. “I mean… I’ve told you about Goldenblood. The O.I.A.?”
我看了一个又一个，头晕目眩。"嗯......我.....。.我一定告诉过你！我的意思是......我没有吗?"我看了一个又一个。"我的意思是......我已经告诉过你金色血液的事了。O.i.a.?"
“You never told me you found out what Chimera was,” P-21 said with a scowl. “And the only time I’ve heard you mention Goldenblood was when you told me he was up to something. I thought you were referring to Sanguine, but you were so focused on helping Glory I didn’t press you.”
"你从来没有告诉我你发现了奇美拉是什么,"P-21愁眉苦脸地说。"我唯一一次听你提起金血王是在你告诉我他在谋划什么的时候。我以为你指的是桑吉尼，但你太专注于帮助晨辉了，我没有逼你。"
Zodiac chuckled softly. “Well, Security. It looks like you’ve got some explaining to do. But, first things first. Now, as I was saying, I can take all debt and worry off your hooves in exchange for EC-1101.” A robot approached, two mechanical arms ending in PipBuck removal keys.
黄道带轻声地笑了。"嗯，安全问题。看来你得好好解释一下了。但是，首先要做的是。现在，正如我所说的，我可以用EC-1101来换取你所有的债务和担心。"一个机器人走过来，两个机械手臂插在去除PipBuck的按键上。
I was so overwhelmed that I landed firmly on my butt. My friends were pissed
我完全不知所措，一屁股坐在地上。我的朋友们很生气
with me... and now I owed more caps than I could even imagine! I wanted to scream! I wanted to hand it over, along with all my questions, worries, and annoyances. Just then, I wanted to give it all up to a pony who actually seemed to have a clue about what to do with the damned thing. Take my PipBuck. Enjoy! I was toast anyway. Take this damned weight from off my hoof and do something better than trot all over a damned city with it.
现在我欠的钱比我想象的还多！我想尖叫！我想把它连同我所有的问题、担忧和烦恼一起交出去。就在那时，我想把这一切都交给一匹小马，它似乎真的知道该怎么处理这该死的东西。拿着我的皮伯克。好好享受吧！不管怎样，我已经被烤熟了。把这该死的负担从我的蹄子上拿下来，做点比带着它在这该死的城市里跑来跑去更好的事吧。
Then a clear, wonderful voice shouted over the babble. “Blackjack doesn’t owe you anything!” I turned and stared at the sight of Glory looking more beautiful and radiant than I’d ever imagined, even with one wing replaced by a dull nub. She looked at me with her brilliant purple eyes and gave me a smile that made me want to melt in her embrace then and there.
这时，一个清晰的、美妙的声音盖过了嘈杂的声音。"Blackjack不欠你任何东西!"我转过身来，凝视着晨辉的景象，它看起来比我想象的更美丽，更光彩照人，即使它的一个翅膀被一个无聊的瘤子取代了。她用她明亮的紫色眼睛看着我，给了我一个微笑，让我想融化在她的怀抱当场。
Zodiac frowned at Glory. “Excuse me, but we spent serious money on you and your friends…”
黄道带对晨辉皱起了眉头。"对不起，我们在你和你的朋友身上花了很多钱......"
“Did Blackjack agree to assume these debts?” Glory asked sharply, pointing her wingtip at the flickering pony projection.
"Blackjack是否同意承担这些债务?"晨辉尖锐地问道，把她的翼尖指向闪烁的小马投影。
“Of course not, she was unconscious. But Rampage…” Zodiac began, but Glory cut her off with a magnificent sweep of her wing.
"当然没有，她失去了知觉。但是暴怒......"黄道带开始了，但晨辉用她华丽的翅膀扫了她一下。
“Did Blackjack ever say that Rampage spoke for her and the rest of us? You might want to collect your fifty thousand caps from her.”
"黑杰克有没有说过，狂暴为她和我们其他人说话？你也许想从她那里拿回你的五万顶帽子。"
Rampage blinked, then the striped filly suddenly grinned. “Sure! I got fifty caps on me. I’ll pay the rest later.” Zodiac looked like she’d swallowed a shot of The Price... well, like Rampage did when she’d swallowed a shot of The Price. Rampage nudged me. “Hey, Blackjack? Can I get my fifty caps back?”
狂暴眨了眨眼，然后条纹小母马突然咧嘴笑了。"当然！我身上有五十个球帽。剩下的我以后再付。"十二宫杀手看起来就像吞下了一杯价格......嗯，就像她吞下了价格一样。狂暴激怒了我。"嘿，黑杰克？我能拿回我的五十顶帽子吗?"
Glory stepped past us to slowly walk back and forth in front of the projection. “Not once did Blackjack agree to pay you anything. Not once, I bet, did you ask her, or even mention that you were going to want her to pay for it. You spent all that material before telling her so that you could spring all of it on her at once and guilt EC-1101 out of her.” My jaw dropped as I stared at the shimmering mare. And it had almost worked!
晨辉从我们身边走过，慢慢地在投射面前来回走动。"黑杰克一次也没答应给你钱。我敢打赌，你一次也没有问过她，甚至没有提过你想让她为此付出代价。你在告诉她之前花光了所有的材料，这样你就可以一下子把所有的材料都告诉她，然后让她内疚EC-1101。"当我盯着那匹闪闪发光的母马时，我的下巴都掉了下来。而且差点就成功了！
Zodiacglowered for a moment, then finally slumped. “Okay. I admit it. I was hoping to get her to pass it to me and leave and be grateful.”
黄道带降落了一会儿，然后最终坠落。"好吧。我承认。我希望她能把它递给我，然后离开，心存感激。"
“But you had me unconscious for hours. Why didn’t you just take it?” I asked as I rose and stepped forward next to Glory.
"但是你让我昏迷了好几个小时。你为什么不直接拿走呢?"我站起身来，走到晨辉身边问道。
The professor rolled her eyes. “Blackjack, do you know how much success anypony’s had at taking anything from you? Your PipBuck? Your life? Your friends? Heck, you’ve faced half the Zodiacs and lived! If I were Sanguine, I’d be living in constant terror of the day you finally track him down!” She sighed. “I hoped that, if I just convinced you to give it up, you’d move on. No harm, no foul.”
教授翻了翻白眼。"黑杰克，你知道任何一匹小马从你那里抢走任何东西有多成功吗？你的皮伯克？你的生活？你的朋友？见鬼，你已经面对过半数的黄道带生物并且活了下来！如果我是桑吉尼，我会一直生活在恐惧中，害怕有一天你终于找到了他!"她叹了口气。"我希望，如果我说服你放弃，你就会继续前进。没有伤害，就不算犯规。"
P-21 stepped next to me. “Well, then, if you don’t mind… right now, I think we’d all love to hear everything Blackjack knows about… everything,” he said, looking a little bit hurt. “Along with an explanation of why she didn’t tell us sooner.” Oooh, there was fifty thousand caps worth of guilt right there in his expression. I hung my head and sighed.
P-21走到我旁边。"好吧，那么，如果你不介意的话......现在，我想我们都想听听Blackjack知道的一切......一切,"他说，看起来有点受伤。"还要解释为什么她没有早点告诉我们。"哦，在他的表情里有价值五万的罪恶感。我低下头，叹了口气。
Everything I knew… well, that wouldn’t take long. “It’s not like I was trying to deceive you or keep it from you. It just… snuck up on me,” I said as I took a seat, rubbing my striped mane. Glory sat down next to me, stretching her wing across my shoulders, and the others sat in a circle around me. I sighed as I was gently pulled against her. Smelled her sweet hide. Heard the faint beat of her heart. Okay, I could do this. “Well… I guess I should start with a pony named Goldenblood…”
我所知道的一切...不会花很长时间的。"我不是想欺骗你，也不是想瞒着你。我一边说，一边坐下，抚摸着我的条纹鬃毛。晨辉坐在我旁边，把她的翅膀搭在我的肩膀上，其他人围着我坐成一圈。我轻轻地靠在她身上，叹了口气。闻到了她甜蜜的藏身之处。听到她心脏微弱的跳动。好吧，我可以这么做。"嗯......我想我应该从一匹名叫金血的小马开始......"
* * *
* * *
“How do I feel about Blackjack? Do… do I have to answer? Okay… she’s… she’s not going to hear this, is she? ‘Cause… you know… I don’t want to say anything bad. Okay...
"我觉得黑杰克怎么样？我...我必须回答吗？好吧...她...她不会听到这个的对吧？因为......你知道......我不想说什么坏话。好吧。
“Blackjack is… scary. I don’t really mean that I’m scared of her. I mean… I am. A little. But I know she’s not a bad pony. She cares. But Blackjack… I think she’s a little bit crazy. She left the stable, which was crazy. She came back, which was crazy. She killed everypony… which was crazy. And I think, if she was given the choice, she’d do all three again. And that makes her crazy scary.
"黑杰克...很吓人。我不是说我害怕她。我是说...我是。一点点。但我知道她不是一匹坏小马。她在乎。但是Blackjack...我觉得她有点疯狂。她离开了那个疯狂的马厩。她回来了，这太疯狂了。她杀了所有的小马...这太疯狂了。我认为，如果让她选择的话，她会再做一次这三件事。这让她非常害怕。
“So, I know if something bad happens, she’s not going to do what’s smart. She doesn’t think about things like that. She just does things and hopes that they work out. And sometimes they do. And sometimes they don’t… but no matter what, she’s going to do something. She just doesn’t hang back and think. She
"所以，我知道如果有什么不好的事情发生，她不会做聪明的事情。她不会那样想的。她只是做事情，并希望他们能解决问题。有时候确实如此。有时候他们不会...但是无论如何，她都会做些什么。她不会退缩，不会思考。她
goes… and if what she does is crazy, then it’s better than just standing around doing nothing.
如果她的所作所为是疯狂的，那总比什么都不做要好。
“I mean… she said she wet the bed… I mean… really? Heh… Thanks, Blackjack…”
"我是说......她说她尿床了......我是说......真的吗？嘿...谢谢你，Blackjack..."
* * *
* * *
A few hours later, their questions for me were exhausted, as was I. I’d told them every bit I could think of about Goldenblood, the O.I.A., and the projects. The only things I omitted were Gardens of Equestria and Spike. The professor, using more robots, had brought drinks and snacks, playing the part of the contrite host. My friends’ reactions varied from worried, to baffled, to suspicious, to bored, to angry. I never expected Lacunae to be the angry one. “That… that fiend. That plotter! That… oooh… the Goddess does not want to hear any more!”
几个小时后，他们对我的问题已经问得筋疲力尽了，我也是。我告诉他们我能想到的关于金血王、o.I.a.和项目的一切。我唯一漏掉的就是Equestria和斯派克的花园。教授使用了更多的机器人，带来了饮料和零食，扮演着忏悔主持人的角色。我的朋友们的反应各不相同，有的担心，有的困惑，有的怀疑，有的无聊，有的愤怒。我从来没有想到空隙会是愤怒的那个。"那个...那个恶魔。那个阴谋家！那个......哦......女神不想再听了!"
“But how could the O.I.A. pull off such a widespread deception?” P-21 asked. “Didn’t anypony think to check what he was up to?”
"但是，o.i.a.是如何实施如此广泛的欺骗的呢?"P-21要求。"难道没有人想过去看看他在干什么吗?"
The professor chuckled softly. “Oh, Goldenblood was a sneaky bastard, but, really, back then, most ponies didn’t think about things like that. They were used to a thousand years of Celestia running things. Celestia was always open and honest. Luna’s government was as different as night from day, using deception and obfuscation to keep ponies confused and obedient. And Goldenblood knew all the loopholes, tricks, and intricacies. After all, he helped Luna set them up.” She rubbed her ghostly chin. “And I suspect that Luna herself enjoyed the games on some level.”
教授轻声地笑了。"哦，金血王是个狡猾的混蛋，但是，说真的，在那个时候，大多数小马都不会这么想。他们已经习惯了塞莱斯蒂亚一千年的统治。塞莱斯蒂亚总是开诚布公的。卢纳的政府就像白天和黑夜一样不同，他们用欺骗和迷惑的手段来迷惑和服从小马。金布拉德知道所有的漏洞，把戏和错综复杂。毕竟，是他帮卢娜安排的。"她抚摸着幽灵般的下巴。"我怀疑卢娜自己在某种程度上也很享受这些游戏。"
“But you can’t tell me the Ministry Mares were okay with that!” Glory protested as I slumped against her shoulder. Had she always smelled this good?
"但是你不能告诉我魔法部的母马对此没有意见!"晨辉抗议道，我靠在她的肩膀上。她一直都这么好闻吗？
The professor shrugged. “They were used to working for Celestia too. They expected straightforward deals from their ruler. Friendship. Trust.” She sighed and shook her head. “Luna respected the Ministry Mares and their capabilities, but... really, I was always shocked they were sucked in as readily as they were. They really seemed to believe Luna was their friend. I doubt that the Princess ever had a real friend.”
教授耸了耸肩。"他们也习惯于为塞莱斯蒂亚工作。他们期望从他们的统治者那里得到直截了当的交易。友谊。信任。"她叹了口气，摇了摇头。"卢娜尊重魔法部的母马和它们的能力，但是......说真的，我总是很惊讶它们竟然如此轻易地被吸进去了。他们似乎真的相信卢娜是他们的朋友。我怀疑公主是否有过一个真正的朋友。"
I looked at the shimmering projection, the others followed my gaze, and then P-21 asked the questions on all our minds. ”What are you, and how do you know
我看着闪闪发光的投影，其他人跟着我的目光，然后P-21问了我们所有人心中的问题。"你是什么，你是怎么知道的
all this?”
这一切?"
The shimmering image seemed to consider him before responding. “I am Professor Zodiac. What you’re looking at is an arcane projection. A nice little modification of the planetarium system developed by Flash Industries. It’s a pleasant way for me to have conversations with ponies.” She gave a little shudder I nearly missed. “As for how I know… well… I was there two hundred years ago.” She looked right into my eyes and gave an apologetic little smile. “I was one of the research leads of the Office of Interministry Affairs.”
闪闪发光的影像似乎在回答之前考虑了他。"我是黄道带教授。你现在看到的是一个神秘的投影。一个不错的小修改天文馆系统开发的Flash工业。对我来说，这是一种与小马交谈的愉快方式。"她打了个寒颤，我差点没打中。"至于我是怎么知道的......好吧......两百年前我就在那儿了。"她看着我的眼睛，带着歉意的微笑。"我是部际事务办公室的研究主管之一。"
* * *
* * *
We’d had to take a little break. My brain was reeling. Here was a pony who’d tried to trick me out of EC-1101 and who’d actually known Goldenblood. Who’d worked under him. Who possibly had answers to all my questions. Glory and I’d gone up to the roof; I stayed in the doorway while she took in some air. Rampage and Scotch Tape had finally left with the Zodiacs; the machinery clearly scared the filly to death. She wasn’t over the tunnels yet. Lacunae had walked off, still talking to herself in the plural and apparently very put out with Goldenblood; I wondered if she knew I could hear her faint telepathic babble. P-21 skulked off to be on his own.
我们不得不休息一下。我的脑子一片空白。这里有一匹小马，它想把我从EC-1101里骗出来，而且它真的认识金色血统。在他手下工作过的人。他可能知道我所有问题的答案。晨辉和我上了屋顶;我呆在门口，她吸了点新鲜空气。横冲直撞和苏格兰磁带终于和黄道带一起离开了，这台机器显然把小母马吓死了。她还没过隧道呢。拉库尼走开了，还在用复数自言自语，显然对金色血液很不耐烦;我不知道她是否知道我能听到她那微弱的心灵感应的胡言乱语。P-21偷偷摸摸地独自一人。
“How are you feeling?” I asked softly.
"你感觉怎么样?"我轻声问道。
She glanced over her shoulder at her missing wing for a moment, then immediately lowered her gaze to my hooves. “Grounded… but better.” She looked at me, and her smile returned. Goddesses, she was so beautiful. “You actually tracked down my sister to help me?” she said, cocking her brow at me.
她越过肩膀瞥了一眼自己失去的翅膀，然后立刻把目光放到了我的蹄子上。"禁足......不过好多了。"她看着我，笑容回来了。女神们，她是如此美丽。"你真的找到我妹妹来帮我?"她说，扬起眉毛看着我。
“It was all I could think of…” I said lamely, tapping my rubbery hooves together.
"这是我能想到的一切......"我一瘸一拐地说，用橡胶似的蹄子敲打着。
She gave me a wry smile. “You realize that Dusk and I hate each other, right? I think she spent more time shouting at me and comparing me to Mother than comforting me.” I winced, but she smiled. “It was the kick to the rump I needed. Thank you.”
她苦笑了一下。"你知道黄昏和我讨厌对方，对吧？我想她花了更多的时间对我大喊大叫，把我比作母亲，而不是安慰我。"我皱了皱眉，但她笑了。"我需要的是一脚踢向臀部。谢谢。"
“I knew… I knew I couldn’t help you.” She looked at me more sympathetically as I went on. “I cost you your wing. I cost you everything. All I’ve done is hurt you, Glory,” I said with a sniff, feeling myself start to shake.
"我知道......我知道我帮不了你。"当我继续说下去时，她更同情地看着我。"我让你失去了翅膀。我让你失去了一切。"我所做的一切都伤害了你，晨辉,"我轻蔑地说，感觉自己开始颤抖。
And then she was hugging me. Holding me. I took a deep breath to try and steady myself, feeling her feathers, so soft on my cheek. “You saved my life, Blackjack. Again and again. I don’t blame you for my wing.” She drew back enough look me in the eye and smiled. “Not telling me about Goldenblood and the projects, though…”
然后她抱着我。抱着我。我深深地吸了一口气，试着让自己平静下来，感觉到她的羽毛如此柔软地贴在我的脸颊上。"你救了我的命，黑杰克。一次又一次。我的翅膀不怪你。"她退后一些，看着我的眼睛，微笑着。"尽管没有告诉我金血王子和那些项目......"
“I’m sorry,” I repeated for the twentieth time. “I really didn’t mean to keep it from any of you. It wasn’t a big secret. It wasn’t a big deal at first. Just… sorta cool, secret stuff. Stuff that happened two centuries ago. But then I found out about Chimera and the other projects… saw Goldenblood’s memories… It all sort of built up around me.”
"对不起,"我重复了二十遍。"我真的不想瞒着你们任何人。这不是什么大秘密。一开始没什么大不了的。只是...一些很酷的秘密。两个世纪前发生的事。但后来我发现了奇美拉和其他项目......看到了金血王的记忆......所有这些都在我周围建立起来。"
“Well,” she said, relaxing a little bit, “I think that Lacunae is even more upset. I think you managed to offend the Goddess big time by not mentioning that Sanguine has Chimera.” Then Glory looked me in the eye, stroking my cheek under my eyepatch. “And how are you doing?”
"好吧,"她说，稍微放松了一点,"我认为拉库纳更难过。我认为你没有提到桑吉娜有奇美拉，是在大大地冒犯了女神。"然后，晨辉看着我的眼睛，在我的眼罩下抚摸我的脸颊。"你怎么样?"
“Me?” I felt a cold shiver along my spine and lied with every bit of effort I could. “Fine. Never better. Just great. They fixed me up swell…” I felt my grin become so tense that it felt like it’d snap. She looked at me like she was about to cry. Finally, I slumped. “You know, huh?”
"我?"我感到一阵寒意沿着我的脊椎打了个寒颤，我尽了最大努力撒了个谎。"好吧。再好不过了。太棒了。他们把我治好了......"我觉得我的笑容变得如此紧张，以至于我感觉它要断了。她看着我，好像要哭了。最后，我摔倒了。"你知道吗?"
“I was there for part of the procedure… while they had you open…” Glory said softly.
"我在那里做了一部分手术......当他们把你打开的时候......"晨辉轻声说。
“Oh.” I sighed, hanging my head a little. “And do I really look that bad inside?”
"哦。"我叹了口气，低了一下头。"我的内心真的那么糟糕吗?"
“You really do,” Glory said softly as she stroked my cheek. “Your organs are in bad shape, Blackjack… Triage told you?” Clearly, she shouldn’t have, from the look on Glory’s face.
"真的,"格洛里轻轻地抚摸着我的脸颊说。"你的器官情况很糟，黑杰克......分诊告诉你的?"显然，她不应该这么做，从晨辉脸上的表情来看。
I grinned. “Oh… about the whole six months thing? Ppppft. Never tell me the odds,” I said as I grinned back at her. “I’m sure I can pull off… like… a year…” I was grinning, right? “No big… big deal…” Smile, damn it! Damn it… My head slowly bowed as I started to shake again. She put her hooves around me as I pressed my face to her chest as the sob broke out all at once as the inexplicable truth crashed through me: I was going to die.
我咧嘴一笑。"哦......关于整整六个月的事情？Ppppft.永远不要告诉我胜算,"我咧嘴笑着对她说。"我肯定我能成功......大概......一年......"我笑着说，对吧？"没什么大不了的......"微笑，该死的！该死的......我的头慢慢地低了下去，我又开始颤抖了。当我把脸贴在她的胸前时，她用蹄子把我围住，当那个无法解释的真相冲击我时，突然爆发出一阵呜咽:我要死了。
I was going to die! Without Glory’s suffering and the Zodiacs and the professor to distract me, there was nothing I could do to avoid facing it. The taint inside
我就要死了！没有晨辉的苦难，没有生肖和教授的干扰，我无法避免面对它。内在的污点
me was going to twist my body up more and more until finally something critical failed. Better if I blew my brains out now while I was still whole and ‘healthy’. Better if Red Eye’s slavers had killed me! I could almost feel my insides churning up, my sick and diseased heart beating slowly. My braces clacked as I hugged her close and sobbed against her again and again. I hated it… hated these tears… but I couldn’t… stop…
我会越来越扭曲我的身体，直到最后一个关键的失败。如果我现在在我还健康完整的时候把自己的脑袋轰掉会更好。要是红眼的奴隶贩子杀了我就好了！我几乎可以感觉到我的内心在翻腾，我那病态的心脏在慢慢地跳动。我紧紧地抱住她，一遍又一遍地在她身上抽泣，牙套发出咯咯的响声。我讨厌它...讨厌这些眼泪...但我不能...停止..。
“It’s… It’s not fair…” I gasped. I shook with each new spasm of tears. “I… I wanted to save Mom… I wanted to save Midnight… and… and everypony in 99. I wanted to save you. Have a kid someday. Have a… have a life! I found something to live for, damn it!” I said, my voice hoarse and choking as snot and tears seemed to flow equally. “And now… now I’m just… just going to die?! Why the fuck is this happening to me? What the fuck does it take for me to get a fucking break? To have something fucking good happen? Anything!” I yelled into her chest. “I’m sick of it!”
"这...这不公平..."我喘着气说。每一次眼泪的抽搐都让我颤抖。"我.....。.我想救妈妈......我想救午夜......还有......还有99年的每一匹小马。我想救你。有朝一日要个孩子。有一个。.有自己的生活！我找到了活下去的理由，该死的!"我说，我的声音沙哑而哽咽，因为鼻涕和眼泪似乎同样流淌。"现在......现在我就......就要死了?！为什么会发生在我身上？我他妈的要怎样才能休息一下？让好事发生？什么都行!"我对着她的胸口大喊。"我受够了!"
I used to think that there was a bottom to tears. That eventually you just couldn’t cry anymore and then you’d feel better. But now I knew better. Whatever strength I’d shown facing the Zodiacs was a lie. My confidence was a front. I was going to die… and it was going to be a bad death. And, like that, I was falling into a pit from which there was no escape.
我过去常常认为眼泪是有底线的。最终你再也哭不出来了，然后你会感觉好多了。但现在我更清楚了。无论我面对十二宫时表现出什么力量，那都是谎言。我的自信只是个幌子。我就要死了...死得很惨。就这样，我掉进了一个无法逃脱的陷阱。
Then I felt Glory’s tears falling on the back of my head. “I’m sorry…” she whispered softly in my ear. “I’m sorry I can’t help you. I wish there was somepony in the Wasteland I could find to help you.”
然后我感到晨辉的眼泪落在我的后脑勺上。"对不起......"她在我耳边轻声说道。"对不起，我帮不了你。我希望在荒原上能找到一匹小马来帮助你。"
I closed my eye. What was I doing? How could I be crying and pitying myself like this now? It wasn’t fair? No, it wasn’t fucking fair. It wasn’t fair that Glory had lost her wing. It wasn’t fair that P-21 had been raped. It wasn’t fair that Scotch Tape was an orphan, that Lacunae was the dumpster for a Goddess’s insecurities, or that Rampage had been denied her own identity. None of it was fucking fair!
我闭上了眼睛。我在做什么？我现在怎么能这样哭泣和怜悯自己呢？这不公平吗？不，这他妈的不公平。晨辉失去了她的翅膀，这是不公平的。P-21被强奸是不公平的。这是不公平的，苏格兰胶带是一个孤儿，拉古尼是一个女神的不安全感的垃圾箱，或者狂暴已经否认了她自己的身份。这他妈一点都不公平！
Am I trying to turn us into the deadliest band of angsty, whiny ponies in the Wasteland? Maybe. Despite everything, I finally put a lid over that pit inside me. Right now, Glory needed me to be strong. I sucked at being strong, but for her, somehow, I pulled myself together and wiped the tears from my eye to look at her.
我是不是想把我们变成荒原上最致命的一群愤怒、发牢骚的小马？也许吧。尽管发生了这一切，我最终还是盖住了内心的那个深渊。现在，晨辉需要我变得坚强。我不愿意变得坚强，但是为了她，不知怎么的，我振作起来，擦去眼中的泪水，看着她。
“You do, Glory. Every second I’m with you, you make things better. Make them easier. I couldn’t do this without you,” I said as I looked into her eyes. Our brows touched.
"你知道，晨辉。我和你在一起的每一秒，你都让事情变得更好。让它们变得更容易。没有你我做不到,"我看着她的眼睛说。我们的眉毛碰了一下。
Our lips did the same. Sweet Celestia, how I missed this.
我们的嘴唇也是如此。亲爱的塞莱斯蒂亚，我怎么会错过这个。
I was going to die, but at least I wouldn’t be dying alone.
我就要死了，但至少我不会孤独地死去。
* * *
* * *
“Sooo, am I forgiven?” I asked as we trotted back down to the planetarium.
"那么，原谅我了吗?"我们一路小跑回到天文馆，我问道。
She smiled. “Dusk may be an infuriating mare who tried to kill me, but she said that anypony who’d do what you did after the stable shouldn’t be touched with a ten foot cloud… unless she did what you did when you found out how hurt I was.” She gave my rump a nudge with hers. “Then you should probably get another chance.” She had a weird little smile… and why was she blushing?
她笑了。"黄昏可能是一个愤怒的母马谁试图杀死我，但她说，任何小马谁会做你在马厩后做的事情不应该与10英尺的云接触...除非她做了你所做的，当你发现我是多么受伤。"她用她的手肘轻推了一下我的屁股。"那你应该再找一次机会。"她有一个奇怪的微笑......为什么她脸红了？
“I always liked Dusk, you know?” I said as trotted along, my braces clattering.
"我一直很喜欢《黄昏》，你知道吗?"我一边说，一边小跑着，我的支架叮当作响。
“She also said that you were a terrorist and an idiot and would probably get me killed,” Glory added.
"她还说你是个恐怖分子，是个白痴，可能会害死我,"晨辉补充说。
I cocked my head, thinking about that for a moment. “Mmmm, nope! Still like her.” I glanced at her and, of course, risked injecting a cloud into the discussion. “Did she have any news from Thunderhead?”
我抬起头，想了一会儿。"嗯，没有！还是喜欢她。"我瞥了她一眼，当然，冒着在讨论中加入一片乌云的危险。"她有从霹雳头传来的消息吗?"
Glory sighed and nodded. “Yes. Most of it mixed. Dad refused to resign, challenging my ‘confession’. I’m MIA at the moment, since my ‘remains’ couldn’t be magically analyzed. So, technically, there’s a warrant out on me. Lambent and Lucent were both pretty upset by it all.” She looked at me and asked in concern, “Do you know anything about a surface pony named Red Eye?”
晨辉叹了口气，点了点头。"是的。大部分是混合的。父亲拒绝辞职，质疑我的"坦白"。我现在失踪了，因为我的'遗体'不能被魔法般地分析。所以严格来说我是被通缉的。兰本特和朗讯都对此感到非常失望。"她看着我，关切地问道:"你知道一种叫红眼睛的水面小马吗?"
“I know he took over Paradise. Apparently, the Stable Dweller is fighting him.” I had images of magical unicorn power armor striding around firing death beams from its horn. Pzow! Pzow!
"我知道他接管了天堂。显然，马厩居民正在与他作斗争。"我有魔法独角兽力量盔甲的图像，它的角上发射着死亡之光。噗！噗！
“Well, he’s got the rest of the Enclave stirred up. And, apparently, they’re very upset with Thunderhead. They’re blaming the Volunteer Corps for drawing
""嗯，他把飞地的其余部分都煽动起来了。而且，很明显，他们对Thunderhead非常不满。他们指责志愿者队画画
attention. And I suppose they have a point,” Glory said with a sigh. “Even though DJ Pon3 barely mentions us at all, most ponies wouldn’t even think of us if it wasn’t for the Volunteer Corps.”
注意。我想他们说得有道理,"格洛里叹了口气说。"尽管DJPon3几乎没有提到我们，但如果没有志愿者队，大多数小马都不会想到我们。"
“The Volunteer Corps is also pretty much the only good thing I’ve heard about pegasi doing since the war,” I said softly as I bumped her rump back.
"志愿军也是我听说的飞马座自战争以来唯一一件好事,"我轻轻地说着，把它的屁股撞了回去。
She gave a pleased little smile. “Well, the rest of the Enclave is using it as an excuse to demand all sorts of things from us. They want new energy weapons, new talismans, and a larger food reserve built up in Neighvarro. And they want the VC ended, never mind that our food trade is how we’re getting the materials for weapons, gemstones for talismans, and new food.”
她微微一笑。"好吧，昂科雷的其他人正以此为借口，向我们索要各种各样的东西。他们想要新的能源武器，新的护身符，以及在Neighvarro建立更大的粮食储备。他们希望结束越共，更不用说我们的食品贸易就是我们获得武器原料、护身符宝石和新食品的途径。"
I didn’t like the thought of the Enclave getting more weapons, but I was more surprised by that last bit of news. “The pegasi are importing food? From the surface?” I blinked in shock.
我不喜欢昂科雷得到更多武器的想法，但是最后一条消息让我更加惊讶。"飞马座的人在进口食物？从表面上看?"我震惊地眨了眨眼睛。
Glory smirked at me. “Believe it or not, that’s one of the major selling points of the VC. The fact is that only a few surface crops were adaptable to cloud seeding. It gives us basic staples but lacks something in the way of variety. Have you ever tasted a strawberry?” I shook my head, and she gave a shiver. “Well, neither had anypony in Thunderhead. Father won a major vote to get the VC more assistance from the security forces after passing out a dozen cartons. And there was nearly a riot when blueberry samples were provided.”
晨辉向我傻笑。"信不信由你，这是风险投资的主要卖点之一。事实上，只有少数地表作物适合播云。它给我们提供了基本的必需品，但缺乏多样性。你尝过草莓吗?"我摇了摇头，她打了个寒颤。"好吧，在霹雳头也没有小马。父亲在分发了一打纸板箱后，赢得了一次重要的投票，从安全部队那里得到了越共更多的援助。当提供蓝莓样品时，几乎发生了骚乱。"
“A riot? For berries?” I muttered, stunned.
"暴动？为了浆果?"我喃喃自语，目瞪口呆。
“Oh, yes. Cloud grain may be nutritious, but it’s hardly tasty,” she said with a laugh. “Folks were so amazed by the flavor that now anything with the word ‘berry’ in the name is classified as a controlled substance. So, despite all the stories of death and disease, VC recruitment numbers haven’t dropped off as much as some anticipated.”
"哦，是的。云纹可能很有营养，但不好吃,"她笑着说。"人们对这种味道如此惊讶，以至于现在任何名字中带有'berry'这个词的东西都被列为管制药物。因此，尽管有很多关于死亡和疾病的报道，风险投资公司的招聘人数并没有像一些人预期的那样下降。"
“They do know that the Society is probably the only place in Equestria where you can find berries, period, right?”
"他们确实知道，学会可能是Equestria唯一一个能找到浆果的地方，对吧?"
“I think that they gloss over that point in the interview. But the public consensus seems to be changing to the surface being worth something rather than just being death, misery, and violence. That’s leading to some major gusts of foul air with the rest of the Enclave, though; the VC period is bad enough, but anything good
"我认为他们在面试中掩盖了这一点。但是公众的共识似乎正在改变，表面上看起来是有价值的，而不仅仅是死亡、痛苦和暴力。不过，这也给昂科雷的其他地方带来了一些严重的空气污染;风险投资时期已经够糟糕的了，但还是不错的
about the surface… I guess the science and political broadcasts are having a sunny day bashing Thunderhead right and left. Criticizing our independence and our willingness to break tradition.” She actually sounded proud of that. Despite the fact that I still wanted to buck Lighthooves to the stars, Glory made Thunderhead sound like the Blackjack of the Enclave.
关于表面......我猜科学和政治广播正经历着一个阳光明媚的日子，到处猛烈抨击着Thunderhead。批评我们的独立性和打破传统的意愿。"她听起来对此很自豪。尽管事实上我仍然想把光头冲向星星，《光荣》让雷头听起来像飞地的黑杰克。
They were doomed…
他们死定了。
* * *
* * *
Once we’d all gotten back inside the planetarium, Professor Zodiac shimmered into being before us as the robots cleared away some of the junk and brought over cushions from the seats. “Sorry. Normally I don’t have visitors. They come, are awed, and run off.”
当我们都回到天文馆后，机器人清理了一些垃圾，从座位上拿来了垫子，十二宫杀手教授在我们面前闪闪发光。"对不起。通常我不会有访客。他们来了，吓了一跳，然后跑掉了。"
“Sorry for being so jaded,” I replied as I settled down. Braces might let me walk, but they were a long way from comfortable.
"对不起，我太累了,"我坐下来回答。牙套也许可以让我走路，但它们离舒适还有很长的路要走。
The silvery projection laughed brightly. “Oh, don’t be. Aside from my Zodiacs, I never have as much company as I’d like.”
银色的投影明亮地笑了。"哦，别这样。除了我的十二宫以外，我从来没有想象中那么多的同伴。"
P-21 looked towards the door. “What is your deal with them? Is it like a Reaper thing?”
P-21向门口望去。"你跟他们有什么交易？是像收魂者那样的东西吗?"
“No. Honestly, it’s more like the Zodiacs have a deal with me than the other way around,” the professor replied softly. “Many ponies have come through here for help. We do what we can, take what payment they can make, and send them on their way. A few, however, stay. The Zodiacs are twelve ponies who see themselves as… I don’t know? Knights, I suppose. While their activities abroad are as bounty hunters, bringing in caps we need, here they protect the Collegiate. This is their castle and I’m their princess. I don’t command them, though.”
"没有。老实说，这更像是"十二宫"与我打交道，而不是相反,"教授轻声回答。"许多小马经过这里寻求帮助。我们尽我们所能，收取他们所能支付的费用，然后送他们上路。然而，还是有一些人留下来了。十二宫是十二匹小马，它们自认为是...我不知道？我想是骑士吧。虽然他们在国外的活动是作为赏金猎人，带来我们需要的帽子，在这里他们保护学院。这是他们的城堡，我是他们的公主。但我没有命令他们。"
Zodiac Knights. “So, then, why’d they come after me?” I asked with a little frown.
十二生肖骑士。"那么，他们为什么要追杀我?"我皱着眉头问道。
She gestured at my hoof. “Because I needed your PipBuck. Virgo thought you were just another exceptionally large bounty. Oh, and thank you very much for not killing her,” she added quickly. “The others were hoping to get it from you one way or another. They actually turned it into a bit of a contest till I told them to cut it out.”
她指了指我的蹄子。"因为我需要你的PipBuck。处女座认为你只是另一个异常巨大的赏金。哦，非常感谢你没有杀死她,"她很快补充道。"其他人都希望通过这样或那样的方式从你那里得到它。实际上，他们把它变成了一场比赛，直到我告诉他们停止。"
I sighed as I settled in on my cushion. “So. What’s your story?” P-21 asked.
我坐在靠垫上叹了口气。"所以。你的故事是什么?"P-21要求。
Professor Zodiac sighed and looked around at the walls wistfully. “Well, originally my name was Silver Stripe, and I was a professor of engineering and arcane science here at Hoofington University.” Suddenly, the professor’s image dissolved and the air overhead filled with dancing lights that coalesced into a moving image of a lecture hall. The view seemed to be from a camera set in the corner of the room. A white unicorn mare with gray zebra-like stripes on her legs and mane was writing on one of the boards at the front of the hall with a piece of chalk. She finished writing a line of weird mathy stuff, put the chalk down, and sighed.
十二生肖教授叹了口气，若有所思地望着四周的墙壁。"嗯，原来我的名字叫银条纹，我是胡芬顿大学的工程学和神秘科学教授。"突然，教授的形象消失了，头顶上的空气中充满了跳动的灯光，这些灯光合并成了一个移动的演讲厅的形象。这景象似乎是从房间角落里的一架照相机里看到的。一匹腿上和鬃毛上有灰色斑马状条纹的白色独角兽母马正用粉笔在大厅前面的一块木板上写字。她写完一行奇怪的东西，放下粉笔，叹了口气。
“There. Well, I hope that you’ve found my lessons useful. The university will see to getting you an acceptable instructor for this class by next week,” she said, turning to a lecture hall that was virtually empty but for a dozen students. They didn’t seem to be paying much attention, either, and most of them shuffled out immediately. A few gave her commiserative farewells though, and one even offered a comforting hug. The professor maintained her composure as she said her goodbyes and put her notes into a saddlebag but slumped after the last student had exited.
"那儿。好吧，我希望你已经发现我的教训是有用的。学校会在下周为你找到一个可以接受的老师,"她说，然后转向一个几乎空无一人的讲堂，里面只有十几个学生。他们似乎也没有给予太多的关注，而且大多数人很快就离开了。有几个人同情地告别了她，还有一个人甚至给了她一个安慰的拥抱。教授一边说着再见，一边把笔记放进一个鞍囊里，但是当最后一个学生走出教室时，她的身体却一下子垮了下来。
“So sorry you lost your tenure, Professor Silver Stripe,” a rasping voice said. A soft cough followed the words as the voice’s owner walked down from the back of the lecture hall. I pointed him out, and my friends murmured softly as the scarred stallion approached the mare in the picture. “I suppose that the board of regents felt a halfblood to be a complication in the present climate,” Goldenblood said in his raspy, rusty-nails voice. He looked like hell, even worse than at the Gala; his pale hide looked raw, as if it were flaking off.
"很遗憾你失去了你的职位，银条纹教授,"一个刺耳的声音说。当那个声音的主人从演讲厅的后面走下来时，伴随着轻微的咳嗽声。我指给他看，当伤痕累累的种马接近照片中的母马时，我的朋友们轻声低语。"我想，在目前的环境下，董事会觉得混血是一种并发症,"Goldenblood用他刺耳、锈铁钉似的声音说。他看起来像地狱，甚至比春节晚会更糟糕;他苍白的皮肤看起来生涩，好像剥落。
She flushed, narrowing her eyes. “Yes, no thanks to you and your grand speech! The ministries have made it abundantly clear that a zony like myself is a liability to the war effort and tantamount to a spy.” He hacked sharply, sitting and bowing his head, and she softened a little. “Are you all right?”
她脸红了，眯起眼睛。"是的，不是因为你和你那盛大的演说！政府各部已经非常清楚地表明，像我这样的狂热分子是战争努力的累赘，等同于间谍。"他厉声砍着，低着头坐着，她的态度也软化了一些。"你没事吧?"
“There’re apparently several ponies in the Ministry of Peace answering that question. I’ll be fine in a moment,” he said, catching his breath. The scarred stallion then leveled his golden eyes at her once more. “I sympathize with your predicament, Professor. Nopony, or zony, should be discriminated against for their lineage. I have some personal experience in that regard.” And, more and
"显然和平部有几匹小马在回答这个问题。我一会儿就好了,"他屏住呼吸说。然后，伤痕累累的种马又一次用它金色的眼睛望着她。"我同情你的困境，教授。Nopony，或zony，应该因为他们的血统而受到歧视。在这方面，我有一些个人经验。"而且，更多更多
more, I saw her relax.
更多时候，我看到她放松下来。
“Well, regardless, the ministries have made it abundantly clear I am not trustworthy,” she said as she slipped on her saddlebags. “So, whatever it is you desire of me, I can assure you the ministries will not approve.”
"好吧，不管怎样，政府部门已经非常清楚地表明，我是不值得信任的,"她一边说一边滑上她的鞍囊。"所以，不管你对我有什么要求，我可以向你保证，政府部门都不会批准。"
“Your father is Doctor Propos at the Roam Academy of Sciences and a part of the Caesar’s cabinet. Your mother is the aunt of a ministry mare. The suspicions of the ministries are unfortunate but not unreasonable,” he said in his soft, raspy voice. It made Silver Stripe lean towards him a little. “However, I am not here on behalf of the ministries. I am here looking to recruit you for an alternative program of my own. And, I assure you, I could not care less about your lineage.”
"你父亲是罗马科学院的普罗波斯博士，也是凯撒内阁的一员。你母亲是一匹牧师母马的姑妈。各部委的怀疑令人遗憾，但并非毫无道理,"他用轻柔刺耳的声音说。这使得银条纹倾向他一点。"不过，我来这里不是代表政府各部。我在这里寻找招募你为一个替代计划我自己的。而且，我向你保证，我一点也不在乎你的血统。"
The image scattered, and the shining projection returned. “That was my first meeting with Goldenblood. I’m sure you noticed his timing; approaching me right at the end of my last lecture?” she said as she arched a brow. “How he pointed out that his own lineage had been used against him? That was classic Goldenblood to a T. He got me involved in the Office of Interministry Affairs as a science advisor.”
影像散开了，闪亮的投影又回来了。"那是我第一次见到金血王。我相信你已经注意到他的时机了，就在我上节课快结束的时候走过来?"她一边说，一边挑起眉毛。"他是怎么指出他自己的血统被用来对付他的？这是典型的金色血统。他让我在部际事务办公室担任科学顾问。"
“You were a zony?” Scotch Tape asked, drawing a slightly annoyed look from the projection.
"你是个疯子?"透明胶带问道，从投影中画出一个有点恼怒的表情。
“Even after two centuries…” she muttered, then sighed. “Yes. My father was a zebra. My mother was a pony. Hence, zony. The only consequence of it should have been an inability to have children, but it was used against me from the start of the war until the burning of Hoofington. I didn't have any loyalties to my father's people, even when Equestria was making it so hard to be a productive member of society, but ponies just saw the stripes. Goldenblood really didn't care, though; I honestly can’t remember a single instance of my background being used against me at the O.I.A.”
"即使过了两个世纪......"她喃喃自语，然后叹了口气。"是的。我父亲是一只斑马。我的母亲是一匹小马。因此，zony。它的唯一后果应该是无法生育，但从战争一开始直到Hoofington被烧毁，它一直被用来对付我。我对我父亲的人民没有任何忠诚，即使当时小马骑士让我很难成为一个有贡献的社会成员，但是小马只是看到了条纹。不过，金布拉德真的不在乎，我真的不记得我的背景在o.i.a.中被用来对付我的任何一个例子。"
“But… what did the O.I.A. actually do?” Glory asked with a little frown. “I mean, Blackjack said that they were supposed to facilitate projects between the ministries. How did you get from that to… making Deus?”
"但是，o.i.a.到底做了什么?"晨辉皱着眉头问道。"我的意思是，Blackjack说他们应该促进各部之间的项目。你是怎么从那个变成......制造天王的?"
“Luna’s government was nothing like Celestia’s, but few ponies truly appreciated how radical it was. On the surface, the ministries handled most of the functions of government, and the rest were covered by Luna herself or the civil service. But in the shadows was the O.I.A. It did what it was supposed to
"卢娜的政府与塞莱斯蒂亚的政府完全不同，但很少有小马真正意识到它有多么激进。表面上，政府的大部分职能由各部委承担，其余部分由卢娜本人或公务员承担。但是在暗处的是o.i.a。它做了它应该做的
do, let the ministries work together on projects more easily, but it also got things done that couldn’t have been done otherwise. Sometimes the Ministry Mares would have a project that simply couldn’t be done in public view. Monsterponies? Extensive cybernetics? The public couldn’t handle it. So, the O.I.A., ignored by or unknown to the public, was tasked with developing these projects in the shadows to their fruition.” She gestured to herself. “I was involved with some of the technical aspects of Project Steelpony and Project Eternity.”
让政府各部门在项目上更容易地合作，但它也完成了一些本来不可能完成的事情。有时，马雷斯部会有一个项目，根本不能在公众视野完成。怪物？广泛的控制论？公众无法接受。因此，被公众忽视或不为公众所知的o.i.a.负责在暗中开发这些项目，使其取得成果。"她做手势示意自己。"我参与了Steelpony项目和永恒之柱的一些技术方面的工作。"
“And Sanguine? He supervised Project Chimera?” Lacunae asked, sounding like she already knew and just wanted confirmation. “I thought it’d been destroyed…”
""那么桑吉尼呢？他是奇美拉计划的负责人?"空隙问道，听起来好像她已经知道了，只是想确认一下。"我以为它已经被毁了......"
“Yes. And Trottenheimer handled everything to do with Project Starfall and Project Horizons.” She rubbed her chin, then waved a glowing hoof. “Don’t ask me about specifics of the other projects, though. Goldenblood was very adamant about keeping information contained in each project, and I only know the most basic information about the ones I wasn’t working on.”
"是的。特罗滕海默负责处理"星陨计划"和"地平线计划"的所有事务。"她揉了揉下巴，然后挥了挥发光的蹄子。"不过，不要问我其他项目的细节。Goldenblood非常坚决地保留每个项目中包含的信息，而我只知道那些我没有参与的项目中最基本的信息。"
“So what was Project Steelpony?” I asked.
"那么，Steelpony项目是什么?"我问道。
The air above her flashed into a still image of a hospital ward full of ponies with missing limbs. Fluttershy and Redheart were looking over them with aching concern in their eyes. “Like Chimera, Steelpony got started in the Ministry of Peace. Despite the M.o.P. pushing healing magic to its limits, ten years had disabled thousands of combat and non-combat ponies.” The image changed to a mare swinging a silvery foreleg and hoof. “Originally, we focused on prosthetics. Making them resilient, adaptable, and as effective as the missing limb.” Then images of diamond dogs getting their limbs replaced filled the air. “Eventually, most of the research was done in Hoofington. Reconstruction and the battlefront gave us a constant supply of needy test subjects.
她头顶上的空气闪现出一幅静止的画面:医院的病房里挤满了缺胳膊少腿的小马。Fluttershy和Redheart正带着疼痛的关注注视着他们。"和奇美拉一样，Steelpony成立于和平部。尽管m.o.p将治愈魔法推到了极限，但十年间，成千上万的战斗小马和非战斗小马失去了生命。"图像变成了一匹摆动着银色前腿和蹄子的母马。"最初，我们主要研究假肢。使他们恢复活力，适应能力强，并且像缺失的肢体一样有效。"然后钻石狗的四肢被换掉的画面充斥在空气中。"最终，大部分研究都是在Hoofington完成的。重建和前线给我们提供了不断供应的有需要的试验对象。
“Then we had soldiers wounded in battle who returned to the war and found themselves more effective than before.” The overhead image showed steel-legged ponies smashing zebra soldiers in brutal hoof-to-hoof combat. “Suddenly, the emphasis of Steelpony wasn’t just replacement but augmentation. But that pushed things further than Fluttershy or Applejack were comfortable with. It’s one thing to want to protect ponies; it’s another to turn a pony into a war machine.” The image overhead showed Applejack and Fluttershy shaking their
"然后我们有士兵在战斗中受伤，他们回到战场，发现自己比以前更有效率。"头顶上方的影像显示，钢腿小马在残酷的蹄对蹄战斗中粉碎斑马士兵。"突然之间，Steelpony的重点不仅仅是取代，而是扩大。但是这使得事情比Fluttershy和苹果白兰地更进一步。保护小马是一回事，把小马变成战争机器又是另一回事。"头顶上的图像显示苹果白兰地和Fluttershy摇晃着他们的手臂
heads gravely at a solemn Goldenblood and frustrated-looking Silver Stripe.
在一个庄严的Goldenblood和沮丧的银色条纹。
The image disappeared, and Professor Zodiac grinned at us. “So we continued it anyway.”
影像消失了，十二宫杀手教授朝我们咧嘴一笑。"所以我们还是继续了。"
“You what?” P-21 blurted. “How?! I mean... it had to take money and materials and… somepony should have caught on.”
"你什么?"P-21脱口而出。"怎么会?！我的意思是......它需要资金和材料，而且......一些小公司应该已经流行起来了。"
The professor shrugged. “Goldenblood was related to royalty. He never had problems paying for materials. I don’t know where the money came from, but he always paid his bills on time.” I frowned; had Goldenblood been fantastically wealthy in addition to a sneaky bastard? Could even a fantastically wealthy pony’s money have covered all of the O.I.A.’s secret expenses?
教授耸了耸肩。"金血王与皇室有血缘关系。他在材料支付上从来没有遇到过问题。我不知道钱是从哪儿来的，但他总是按时付账。"我皱了皱眉头，难道金布拉德除了一个狡猾的混蛋之外还非常富有吗？即使是一匹非常富有的小马的钱也能支付o.i.a.的所有秘密开支吗？
Zodiac seemed to take our silence as a cue to continue. “It was thought that, if we introduced the augmentations gradually, the ministries would accept them. We started with animals before working up to non-pony sophonts and then ponies themselves. Doof was our first fully augmented battle model. And he exceeded our wildest dreams.”
黄道带似乎把我们的沉默当作继续下去的暗示。"人们认为，如果我们逐步推出这些增强措施，各部会接受。我们先从动物开始，然后逐渐变成非小马的声音，然后是小马自己。杜夫是我们第一个完全增强的战斗模型。他超越了我们最疯狂的梦想。"
Another moving image took shape overhead, this one showing Deus being dropped, literally, from a skywagon onto an enemy tank. He landed like a multi-ton cat, smashing an indentation in the turret’s armor, and proceeded to blow apart the enemy lines. Some of the zebra hoof-fighters inflicted considerable blows on his armor, but they repaired themselves before my eyes. Heavy weapons tried to blow him apart, but he was either too tough or too fast for them. Eventually, the zebras scattered. I suppressed a shudder; if it hadn’t been for all the munitions blowing up in his guns, could we have ever beaten him?
另一个移动的影像在头顶成形，这个影像显示了上帝被空投到敌人的坦克上。他像一只重达数吨的猫一样着陆，砸碎了炮塔装甲上的一个凹痕，然后继续摧毁敌人的防线。一些斑马蹄战士给他的盔甲造成了相当大的打击，但他们在我的眼前自我修复。重型武器试图把他炸得粉身碎骨，但对他们来说，他要么太强悍，要么太快。最后，斑马四散奔逃。我忍住不寒而栗;如果不是因为他枪里的弹药爆炸，我们还能打败他吗？
Then he started raping the survivors; Glory snapped her wing in front of Scotch’s eyes, in time I hoped, and immediately after that the image scattered. The professor coughed delicately. “Sorry about that. We determined we had to leave some parts of him intact for psychological reasons. Other test subjects became so listless and apathetic after conversion that they just lay there till deactivated.” Funny. She said ‘deactivated’ like I would have said ‘retired’ not long ago.
然后他开始强奸幸存者;晨辉在苏格兰人的眼前折断了她的翅膀，我希望这是及时的，然后画面立刻散开了。教授小心翼翼地咳嗽着。"对不起。出于心理原因，我们决定不得不保留他身体的某些部分。其他实验对象在转化后变得无精打采，无动于衷，他们只是躺在那里直到失去活性。"有意思。她说的是"停用"，就像我不久前说的"退休"。
“So what happened?” Rampage asked. “Balefire bombs fell, everypony died?”
"那么发生了什么?"狂暴问道。"巴勒火焰炸弹落下，每匹小马都死了?"
She shook her head with a sigh. “Nearly, but not quite. Towards the end, the
她叹了口气，摇了摇头。""差不多，但不完全是。直到最后
O.I.A. went too far. Goldenblood did something that pissed off Luna… immensely. She removed him and put Horse in charge, but the fact was most of us were loyal to Goldenblood. That tick Trueblood was the only one who sucked up to Horse. And Goldenblood had made damn sure that all of us were integral to the O.I.A. Horse wanted to fire all of us, but he wouldn’t have had an O.I.A. left. If he’d had a year, he would have cleaned us out and put his own ponies in charge. But as fate would have it…” She made a gesture.
O.i.a.走得太远了。金血王做了一件让露娜非常生气的事。她赶走了他，让马儿负责，但事实是我们大多数人都忠于Goldenblood。那只虱子特鲁布拉德是唯一一个拍马屁的人。而且Goldenblood非常确信我们所有人都是战马不可或缺的一部分，他想要解雇我们所有人，但是他不会让战马留下任何战马。如果他有一年的时间，他会把我们的钱都花光，让他自己的小马来负责。但是命中注定......"她做了个手势。
The next moving image that shimmered into being was of a city. A massive city far larger than even Hoofington. Balloons of… Pinkie Pie?... floated in the air as if looking for naughty ponies. It looked like a perfectly calm, blue-skies day around noon. Normal. Like life was supposed to be. The viewer was standing in a posh café far up in a fancy building.
下一个闪现出来的活动影像是一个城市。一个比胡芬顿还要大的城市。小手指派的气球？飘浮在空中，好像在寻找淘气的小马驹。它看起来像一个完全平静，蓝天白天约中午。正常。就像生活本该如此。观众站在一个漂亮的咖啡馆里，咖啡馆远在一栋漂亮的建筑里。
I glanced at my friends as they stared up at the image of life before the bombs. I was the only one among us, with the possible exception of Lacunae, who’d really seen it before... well, if you counted memory orbs. Scotch seemed astonished at the sight. P-21 looked more pensive. Glory’s expression was mixed, but then, she’d grown up in a civilized world with a view of the sky. Rampage... well, clearly not all Wasteland ponies were interested in old times, as she was picking at her nose with a hoof. Lacunae appeared coolly indifferent, even a touch scornful; after all, what place would she have in such a world? Me? It looked... nice.
我瞥了一眼我的朋友们，他们凝视着炸弹爆炸前的生活景象。我是我们当中唯一一个，可能除了Lacunae之外，真正见过它的人......好吧，如果你算上记忆球的话。苏格兰人似乎对这一景象感到惊讶。P-21看起来更忧郁。晨辉的表情是复杂的，但是，她是在一个可以看到天空的文明世界中长大的。横冲直撞...好吧，显然不是所有的荒地小马都对旧时代感兴趣，因为她正在用蹄子挖鼻孔。空隙似乎冷漠无情，甚至有点轻蔑;毕竟，在这样一个世界里，她还有什么地位呢？我？看起来...不错。
Then a second, smaller sun burst to life low in the sky. A roiling, green sun with a garish rainbow sheen that clawed at the eyes. All around, ponies began talking in worried tones. More murmurs, almost curious rather than worried. A purple field rose up over every window in the room. Directly in front of us was a large pink building. I wondered if the architect had intended it to kinda resemble a--
然后，第二个小一点的太阳在低空中爆发出生命。一轮翻滚的绿色太阳，闪耀着夺目的彩虹光芒。周围的小马开始用忧虑的声音说话。更多的低语，几乎是好奇而不是担心。房间里的每扇窗户上都升起一片紫色的田野。在我们正前方是一座粉红色的大楼。我想知道建筑师是否有意使它有点像一个--
In a horrible flash of stabbing light, it was transformed into a black silhouette. From behind it rose a dome of fire expanding in all directions. It flowed like water between the skyscrapers and along the narrow streets. Moving like a living, hungry thing, it probed and poked and crept around every building till they were all aflame. Some buildings it shoved over entirely. Others, protected from the flash like this building and the distant pink tower by flickering magic shields, became consumed in the firestorm like party candles.
在一道刺眼的可怕闪光中，它变成了一个黑色的轮廓。它的后面升起了一个火焰的圆顶，向四面八方扩展。它像水一样在摩天大楼之间和狭窄的街道上流淌。它像一只饥饿的活物一样移动着，在每一座建筑物周围探索、探索、爬行，直到它们都燃烧起来。一些建筑物被它完全推倒了。其他人则被闪烁的魔法盾牌保护起来，躲避着像这样的闪光和远处的粉红色塔楼，像聚会蜡烛一样在火风暴中消耗殆尽。
The artificial sun receded, but the fires spread farther and farther. The clouds of
人造太阳逐渐消失，但火势却蔓延得越来越远。乌云密布
smoke in the skies stabbed down with thin spikes, and at the tip of each spike another green sun was born. No moon rose above the opposite horizon in that artificial twilight, a darkness punctuated by bursts of terrible light and fire.
天空中的烟雾被细细的尖刺刺穿，在每个尖刺的顶端又诞生了一个绿色的太阳。在那人造的暮色中，对面的地平线上没有月亮升起来，黑暗中不时出现可怕的光和火的爆发。
Nopony in the café screamed. Talked. Moved. Not till one turned away. Then another. Babble. Screams. Cries and sobs. Reality, such as it was, reasserted itself.
小马在咖啡馆里尖叫着。谈话。感动。直到有人转身离开。然后是另一个。胡言乱语。尖叫。哭泣和抽泣。现实，就像它曾经那样，重新占据了它自己。
The image flickered away. Professor Zodiac hung her head as she said quietly, “I survived in the Manehattan M.A.S. hub along with everyone else fortunate enough to be inside the tower when the world ended.” She looked a little pained. “At first things were… as good as could be expected, under the circumstances, but my O.I.A. affiliation and sterility made my place in the Twilight Society rather difficult. I put up with it for a while but eventually decided to leave and try to find a new home for myself. Fortunately, my augmentations gave me quite an edge. I ended up falling in with a group of others with roughly the same idea, and, after some time spent wandering what used to be Equestria, my friends and I dared venture into Hoofington.”
图像忽隐忽现地消失了。十二宫教授低下头，平静地说:"世界末日来临时，我和其他幸运的人一起在ManehattanM.A.S.中心幸存了下来。"她看起来有点痛苦。"起初，在这种情况下，一切都......和预期的一样好，但是我对o.i.a.的依赖和贫乏使我很难在暮光社会中占有一席之地。我忍受了一段时间，但最终还是决定离开，为自己找一个新家。幸运的是，我的增强给了我相当大的优势。我最终与一群有着大致相同想法的人走到了一起，在这个曾经是小马国的地方游荡了一段时间后，我和朋友们大胆地进入了胡芬顿。"
Twilight Society? What was-- “Excuse me,” Glory said with a frown. “Your augmentation?”
暮光之城协会？"对不起,"晨辉皱着眉头说。"你的增强器?"
“Oh. Well…” There was a hiss next to the projector, and the walls of the metal cylinder peeled away to uncover a glass tank within. “I wasn’t just in charge of Project Steelpony…” she said as we stared at the contents of that jar. In the hazy water was a pony, technically a zony, flayed of its skin and missing three of its limbs. Wires and tubes snaked in and out of the carcass and into a port in the floor. Tangles of wires emerged from empty eye sockets and missing ears. And, maybe it was just me, but the corners of the ragged mouth curled in a smile as the projection declared, “I was also a client.”
"哦。嗯......"投影仪旁边传来一阵嘶嘶声，金属圆筒的壁剥落下来，露出里面的一个玻璃罐。"我不仅仅是负责Steelpony项目......"当我们盯着罐子里的东西时，她说。在朦胧的水面上有一匹小马，严格来说，它是一匹梳妆打扮的矮种马，皮肤剥了，四肢缺了三条。电线和管子蜿蜒地进出胎体，并进入地板的一个接口。一团团的电线从空洞的眼窝和缺失的耳朵中露了出来。而且，也许只有我一个人这样想，但是那张粗糙的嘴角卷成一个微笑，就像那个投射出来的声音说,"我也是一个客户。"
And that was when Scotch Tape started screaming.
就在那时，透明胶带开始尖叫。
* * *
* * *
“Do I like Blackjack? Are you serious? Really?
"我喜欢黑杰克吗？你是认真的吗？真的吗？
“…
"...
“Fine. No, I don’t like Blackjack. Because every second I’m around her I’m reminded of a place that hurt me. Because every time I think I’m over it she does
"好吧。不，我不喜欢黑杰克。因为在她身边的每一秒钟，我都会想起一个伤害我的地方。因为每次我觉得我已经不在乎了，她就会这么做
something to remind me of how much it sucked. She’s a walking, talking reminder of everything that I hate. Sometimes, I don’t think that I’ll ever be over it till she’s dead.
让我想起那段日子有多糟糕。她是一个会走路，会说话的提醒者，让我想起我讨厌的一切。有时候，我觉得直到她死了我才能释怀。
“But no matter how much she hurts me, I know it’s nothing compared to how much she hurts herself. She seems to have this masochistic need to suffer for simply surviving. She runs on guilt and angst, and one day she’s going to choke on it. And I hate it because there’s nothing I can do to stop it. She’s like an addict hooked on martyrdom. She’ll sacrifice her body, happiness, sanity, and life trying to help others even if they don’t deserve it. And she’ll beat herself miserable when she fails.
"但是，无论她伤害我有多深，我知道，与她伤害自己的程度相比，这根本不算什么。她似乎有这种受虐的需要，为了简单的生存而遭受痛苦。她因内疚和焦虑而奔跑，总有一天她会因此而窒息。我讨厌它，因为我无法阻止它。她就像一个殉道者上瘾。她会牺牲自己的身体、幸福、理智和生命去帮助别人，即使他们不值得。当她失败的时候，她会把自己打得很惨。
“How can you like a person like that? How can you love a person like that?
"你怎么能喜欢那样的人呢？你怎么能那样爱一个人呢？
“…No more stupid questions.”
"不要再问愚蠢的问题了。"
* * *
* * *
Okay. Letting Scotch watch the end of Equestria… kick… Letting her sit in on the meeting… kick… Letting her leave Chapel with us in the first place… kick kick kick! I mentally kicked myself over and over again as I waited outside the hospital room that had once housed Glory. I suspected that at this rate they were going to name a wing of this place ‘The Blackjack and Co. Trauma Wing’. Maybe two wings.
好吧。让苏格兰人看着Equestria的末日...踢...让她参加会议...踢...让她和我们一起离开教堂...踢踢！当我在曾经是晨辉医院的病房外面等待的时候，我在心里一遍又一遍地踢自己。我怀疑以这种速度，他们会把这个地方的一个侧翼命名为"黑杰克连锁店"。创伤科。也许是两个翅膀。
Triage stepped out with a sigh. “She’s sedated. Just upset.”
分诊医生叹了口气走了出来。"她服了镇静剂。只是心烦意乱。"
Glory shook her head softly. “She’s not the only one. What the heck was Professor Zodiac thinking? How could she think that that was appropriate for a filly to see?”
晨辉轻轻地摇了摇头。"她不是唯一一个。十二宫杀手教授到底在想什么？她怎么会认为让一匹小母马看到这些东西是合适的呢?"
Triage just looked at her levelly. “Right, because most things in the Wasteland are age appropriate,” she said in a tone saturated in sarcasm. She pulled out a cigarette and lit up. “Anyway, you survive for two hundred years, spend the last twenty stuck in a jar, and then tell me what’s appropriate and inappropriate. I’m glad the prof isn’t a complete basket case.”
伤检员只是平静地看着她。"是的，因为大部分荒原上的东西都是适合年龄的,"她用一种饱含讽刺的语气说。她抽出一支香烟，点燃了。"不管怎样，你活了200年，最后二十年被困在罐子里，然后告诉我什么是合适的，什么是不合适的。我很高兴这位教授不是个彻头彻尾的废物。"
“But what happened to her?” Rampage asked as she looked in the direction of the planetarium. “I mean, most ponies don’t end up in jars. Not unless you folks take making pickles to a whole new level.”
"但是她怎么了?"当她看向天文馆的方向时，狂暴问道。"我的意思是，大多数小马最后都不会被装在罐子里。除非你们把泡菜做到了一个全新的水平。"
Glory coughed at the smoke. “Excuse me…” she said, fanning her wing and wafting the cloud aside.
晨辉对着烟咳嗽。"对不起......"她说，扇动着翅膀，把云飘到一边。
Triage ignored her and snorted another roll of smoke from her nostrils. “Not quite. She took an exploration team down the elevator shaft you lot came up. When she came back, half her body was gone. If it wasn’t for her augments...” She shook her head slowly. “The Collegiate got her stabilized and in that jar, and she’s been that way ever since.”
分诊医生不理她，从她的鼻孔里喷出另一卷烟。"不完全是。她带着一个探险队沿着你们上来的电梯井往下走。当她回来的时候，半个身体已经不见了。如果不是因为她的增加......"她慢慢地摇了摇头。"学院派把她稳定下来，关在那个罐子里，从那以后她就一直这样了。"
I sighed, looking around. No sign of P-21 since we’d left the planetarium. I scowled, not liking this at all. Whether he wanted to admit she was his daughter or not, he should at least be here! Lacunae was also MIA.
我叹了口气，环顾四周。自从我们离开天文馆后就没有P-21的踪迹。我皱着眉头，一点也不喜欢这样。不管他是否愿意承认她是他的女儿，他至少应该在这里！空隙也是失踪。
“Excuse me!” Glory said again. “You’re smoking? In a hospital? Around patients? And oxygen tanks?” Her eyes blazed. “You’re a doctor!”
"对不起!"晨辉又说。"你在抽烟？在医院？在病人身边？那氧气罐呢?"她的眼睛闪闪发光。"你是个医生!"
Triage blinked at Glory. “So? Look around you.” Glory snapped her wing out and swatted the cigarette out of the air. Triage scowled. “What are you, the last Ministry of Peace inspector?”
分诊医生对晨辉眨了眨眼。""那又怎样？看看你周围。"晨辉啪的一声把翅膀折了出来，把烟头从空中拍了出去。伤员分类法。"你是什么，最后一个和平部督察吗?"
“You are a doctor. That means being more than a pissy, bitchy, angry nag. You’re supposed to be a professional. Act like it!” she said as she brought her hoof down on the burning end. Wow. Go assertive Glory! “Now, to the subject of Scotch Tape and not the person who tried to trick Blackjack. Are you certain there’s nothing else you can do for her?”
"你是个医生。这意味着你不仅仅是一个小气的，恶毒的，愤怒的唠叨者。你应该是个专业人士。表现得像一点!"她一边说，一边用蹄子踩着燃烧的那头。哇。去果断的晨辉！"现在，说到透明胶带这个话题，而不是那个试图欺骗黑杰克的人。你确定没有别的办法了吗?"
“Look, unless you want us to start messing with her memories, there’s nothing I can do. And memory therapy was hard enough before everything was blown to pieces,” she said crossly, glancing down at the mashed cigarette.
"听着，除非你想让我们扰乱她的记忆，否则我无能为力。记忆疗法在一切都被炸成碎片之前已经够难的了,"她生气地说，低头看了一眼捣碎的香烟。
“But you can do it?” I asked with a small worried frown and a glance at Glory. Somehow, this felt… easy. It made my stomach churn… though, honestly, that could have been the taint.
"但你能做到吗?"我愁眉苦脸地问道，眼睛望了一下晨辉。不知怎么的，这感觉...很轻松。这让我的胃翻江倒海...虽然，老实说，这可能是污点。
Triage sighed, glowering at Glory one more time before floating another cigarette to her lips but not lightning it. “Well, I did get a few books from the Fluttershy Clinic on how the spells are performed. I know enough to remove a block of memory. Everything from event one to event two. I’m not going to start dicing up her memories to take out just the bad stuff, though, and I’m definitely not going to try adding things. That’s freaky stuff even I can’t do.”
伤员分类法叹了口气，再一次怒视着晨辉，然后又把另一支烟送到她的嘴边，但没有把它点燃。"嗯，我确实从Fluttershy诊所拿到了一些关于咒语如何施展的书。我知道的足够移除一块内存。从一号事件到二号事件。我不会开始切割她的记忆去除那些不好的东西，当然，我也绝对不会去尝试添加一些东西。这种事连我都做不到。"
I sat down with a clatter as Rampage trotted up beside me. She was definitely aging, looking much more the mature filly. Still needed about a day, though. “Blackjack? Are you actually going to do this?”
当狂暴在我身边小跑时，我坐了下来，发出咔嗒咔嗒的声音。她肯定是老了，看起来更像成熟的小母马。不过还需要一天的时间。"黑杰克？你真的要这么做吗?"
“I don’t know,” I muttered.
"我不知道,"我喃喃自语。
Triage rolled her eyes. “Well let me know when you do know. I’ll be outside, finishing my unprofessional cigarette.”
她翻了翻白眼。""好吧，如果你知道了就告诉我。我会在外面，抽完我的非专业香烟。"
Rampage watched her leave. “I think she’s angrier about losing a cigarette than nearly having your horn through her throat.” Personally, I could do with a shot or two of Wild Pegasus. Could I just… have her memories taken away? Would that fix her? Make her happy? It felt dirty. Like a cheat. Rampage seemed to read my thoughts. “You can’t do this, Blackjack. Taking away her memories just to make her happy is wrong.”
狂暴看着她离开。"我觉得她更生气的是丢了一根烟，而不是你的喇叭几乎穿过她的喉咙。"就我个人而言，我可以打一两发野飞马。我能不能...让她的记忆消失？这能治好她吗？让她开心？感觉很脏。像个骗子。狂暴似乎读懂了我的心思。"你不能这么做，黑杰克。为了让她开心而夺走她的记忆是错误的。"
“She had a panic attack, Rampage. Are you saying we should just let her keep suffering?” Glory countered with a worried look.
"她惊恐发作，暴跳如雷。你是说我们应该让她继续受苦吗?"格洛里忧心忡忡地回应着。
“Should we take Blackjack’s memories of 99 away?” Rampage asked sharply. “Or yours, Glory?” I could never forget 99. I didn’t deserve to forget that scream or that smell. The striped pony took in a deep breath. “Our memories make us who we are. Scotch Tape is hurting really bad, so we help her work through it. Send her back to Chapel and the other Crusaders. Let her get over it.”
"我们是否应该抹去Blackjack对99的记忆?"狂暴尖锐地问道。"还是你的晨辉?"我永远不会忘记99。我不应该忘记那尖叫声和那气味。条纹小马深深地吸了一口气。"我们的记忆造就了我们。透明胶带伤得很重，所以我们帮助她度过难关。把她送回教堂和其他十字军战士那里。让她自己克服吧。"
“And what if she never does, Rampage?” Glory countered. “What if she can’t get over it? So she loses two lousy days of pain and misery. There’s nothing in that day I want to remember anyway. I could do with losing an hour or two myself.”
"万一她永远不回来怎么办，狂暴?"晨辉反驳道。"要是她不能接受呢？所以她失去了痛苦和悲惨的两天。无论如何，那天我什么都不想记得。我自己也可以浪费一两个小时。"
Rampage stared at both of us. “Not… remembering… sucks. As terrible as it is, I wish I remembered killing Thorn… and…” She closed her eyes and swallowed hard before continuing, “because it would feel like I actually did it. Then my guilt would be justified but I think about it and all I remember is crying and then… nothing! And next thing I remember, Blackjack got me disintegrated and everypony was pissed and… and Thorn was…” She gritted her teeth. “I’d give anything to remember so I could understand why!”
狂暴盯着我们俩。"没有...回忆...糟透了。尽管很可怕，我还是希望我记得杀了索恩......然后......"她闭上眼睛，艰难地咽了口唾沫，然后继续,"因为那会让我觉得我真的杀了他。然后我的罪恶感就会被证明是正当的，但是我回想起来，我所记得的只有哭泣，然后......什么都没有了！接下来我记得的事情是，Blackjack把我弄得支离破碎，每匹小马都很生气，而且......而荆棘......"她咬紧牙关。"我愿意付出一切来回忆，这样我就能明白为什么了!"
Glory sniffed and rubbed her nose with her wing before resting her hoof on Rampage’s shoulder. “It’s not the same. Scotch didn’t do anything in that time
晨辉用她的翅膀吸了吸鼻子，然后把她的蹄子放在狂暴的肩膀上。"这不一样。苏格兰威士忌在那个时候什么也没做
but experience monstrous things. She’s not losing anything.”
但是经历了可怕的事情。她没有失去任何东西。"
I slowly pulled myself to my clattering hooves. There was only one way to deal with this. I trotted across and tried to use my magic to open the door. Thankfully, the glow flickered a few times and then stabilized long enough to turn the handle and let myself inside. I closed the door behind me; I’d heard from positions A and B, but now I needed to hear from position Scotch.
我慢慢地把自己拉回到我那咯咯作响的蹄子上。只有一个办法来解决这个问题。我小跑着穿过去，试图用我的魔法打开门。谢天谢地，灯光闪烁了几次，然后稳定了足够长的时间来转动把手，让我自己进去。我关上身后的门，我已经从a和b的位置听到了消息，但现在我需要从苏格兰的位置听到消息。
I hated hospital rooms, I realized. I hated the equipment that told you second by second if you were living more or less. I hated the promise that you are always going to get better when in reality, some day, you wouldn’t. My days might be numbered, but I wasn’t going to end them in a place like this if I could help it. Scotch looked tiny and abandoned in the hospital bed. And thinking about P-21… perhaps she was.
我意识到我讨厌医院的病房。我讨厌设备一秒一秒地告诉你，如果你的生活或多或少。我讨厌这样的承诺:你总是会变得更好，而实际上，总有一天，你会变得更好。我的日子可能已经屈指可数了，但是如果可以的话，我不会在这样一个地方结束我的生命。苏格兰人看起来很渺小，被遗弃在医院的病床上。想想P-21...也许她就是。
“I haven’t seen you for a while,” I said quietly to the Dealer.
"我有一阵子没见到你了,"我平静地对商人说。
The old pale stallion stood opposite me. “Haven’t needed to be seen. I reckon you got enough on your mind without me.” He paused. “You look like hell, Blackjack.” I felt like it too. Goddesses, I was tired of being shot up. It didn’t matter how many times they’d stuffed me in a magic healing box, I felt injured. I’d give anything to remember what it was like to not know how it felt to hurt all the time.
那匹苍白的老种马站在我对面。"不需要被看见。我想没有我，你已经够烦心的了。"他停顿了一下。"你看起来糟透了，黑杰克。"我也有这种感觉。女神们，我已经厌倦了被射杀。不管他们把我塞进一个神奇的治疗盒子里多少次，我都觉得受伤了。我愿意付出一切来回忆那种不知道一直受到伤害是什么感觉的感觉。
“Eh… I’m dying,” I said with a shrug. Just like that. Tears of angst to a shrug. I really had to be crazy. “So… what’s your position on this?”
"呃......我要死了,"我耸耸肩说。就这样。焦虑的眼泪变成了耸肩。我一定是疯了。"那么......你对此持什么立场?"
“My position is no position,” he replied softly. “What happens, happens.”
"我的立场是没有立场,"他轻声回答。"发生了什么，就发生了什么。"
“Because I’m screwed either way?” I muttered quietly. Goddesses I wished I could shoot the Wasteland right in the face.
"因为不管怎样我都完蛋了?"我低声咕哝着。女神们，我希望我可以射中这片荒原的脸。
“If you want to think of it that way,” he replied as he shuffled his cards and dealt a three of hearts, a four of hearts, a five of hearts, a six of clubs, and an eight of hearts. “You might have a hand like this. Can’t win with it. Got to discard one. So what do you chose?”
"如果你愿意这么想的话,"他一边回答，一边洗牌，发出一张红桃3、一张红桃4、一张红桃5、一张梅花6和一张红桃8。"你可能有一只这样的手。不可能赢的。得丢掉一个。那么你选择了什么呢?"
“The six of clubs. Better chance at a flush.” He tossed it away and dealt the next card. Ace of spades. I smirked. Of course I didn’t get the card I needed. “Surprise surprise.”
"梅花六。更有可能同花顺。"他把它扔掉，发了下一张牌。黑桃a。我得意地笑了。当然，我没有得到我需要的卡。"惊喜惊喜"
“Yeah. You lost. So tell me, should you be kicking yourself for not discarding the eight and going for a straight?” I blinked in surprise, and the cards disappeared. “You want to do the right thing because you’re afraid that, if you do the wrong thing, she’ll suffer for it. Celestia wanted to do the right thing. Twilight Sparkle wanted to do the right thing. Even Goldenblood. But no matter how you analyze and predict, the fact is, sometimes you just lose. And you have to deal with it. Dealing with it isn’t looking back with regret for making the wrong move.”
"是的。你输了。所以，告诉我，你是否应该为自己没有丢弃八分而改成顺子而自责呢?"我惊讶地眨了眨眼，卡片消失了。"你想做正确的事，因为你害怕，如果你做了错事，她会为此受到伤害。塞莱斯蒂亚想做正确的事情。紫悦想做正确的事。甚至是金色血统。但不管你如何分析和预测，事实是，有时你就是输了。你必须面对它。处理这个问题，不是回首过去，后悔做了错误的决定。"
“Yeah, but… she’s just a filly…” I murmured softly. A filly who was watching me with a look of confusion. Sedated didn’t mean unconscious. Right. She was looking at me with more than a little worry, which was probably not unjustified. I smiled, rubbing the back of my head. “Ah… sorry! Just talking to myself. Me and my crazy… me…” Okay, she wasn’t smiling. I sighed as I trotted to the side of the bed. “I’m sorry, Scotch.”
"是的，但是......她只是一匹小母马......"我低声说。一匹小母马带着困惑的神情看着我。镇静剂并不意味着无意识。对。她有点担心地看着我，这也许不是没有道理的。我微笑着，抚摸着我的后脑勺。"啊......对不起！只是在自言自语。我和我的疯狂...我..."好吧，她没有笑。当我小跑到床边时，我叹了口气。"对不起，苏格兰威士忌。"
“He’s not coming, is he?” she whispered. “I’m not really his daughter, am I?” Ooooh, P-21, you are in SO much trouble right now… and so am I for spilling the beans. “Mom told me I was different from other fillies. That… that I had a daddy in the stable. I had to look up that word in the database; it’d been blacked out of the books at school. And when you told me I… I thought it was a good thing. I thought I wasn’t alone.” She squeezed her eyes closed. “I wish you hadn’t told me, Blackjack.”
"他不来了，是吗?"她低声说。"我其实不是他的女儿，对吧?"噢，P-21，你现在麻烦大了......我也是，因为说漏了嘴。"妈妈告诉我，我和其他小母马不一样。我在马厩里有个爸爸。我不得不在数据库中查找这个词，因为它在学校的课本上被涂黑了。当你告诉我。.我觉得这是件好事。我以为我不是一个人。"她紧紧地闭上眼睛。"我希望你没有告诉我，Blackjack。"
I stroked her mane with a soft sigh, trying to figure out how to tell her I could take it all away. Or if Rampage was right and we should just help her struggle through, painful as it was? I stroked her mane gently. “Don’t worry about it. You’ll be fine…”
我轻轻地叹了口气，抚摸着她的鬃毛，试图想办法告诉她，我可以把这一切都带走。或者如果狂暴是正确的，我们应该只是帮助她挣扎过去，因为它是痛苦的？我轻轻地抚摸着她的鬃毛。"别担心。你会没事的......"
“No, I won’t. I can’t look at a wrecked wagon without wondering if it’s going to move. I saw that… that thing in the jar, and I thought she was going to eat me! I loved working on machines. I do. Mom taught me how to fix stuff when I was just a foal. If something in our quarters broke, she’d show me step by step what went wrong and how to make it work.” She shook her head. “Now… now I think the machines are going to eat me.”
"不，我不会的。我每次看到一辆报废的马车都会担心它会不会动。我看到罐子里的那个东西，我以为她要吃了我！我喜欢在机器上工作。我知道。当我还是小马驹的时候，妈妈就教我如何修理东西。如果我们宿舍里有什么东西坏了，她会一步一步地告诉我哪里出了问题，以及如何修好它。"她摇了摇头。"现在......现在我觉得机器要吃掉我了。"
Damn it. For once, I’d like the Wasteland to be ‘Here’s a nice and easy choice, Blackjack! Door A with fluffy bunnies and carrots or Door B with spikes and landmines!’ Oooo, tough call. “Just try and rest. The doctor will check up on you
该死。这一次，我希望《荒原》成为'这是一个不错的简单选择，Blackjack！门a有蓬松的兔子和胡萝卜，门b有尖刺和地雷哦，很难决定。"试着休息一下吧。医生会给你检查的
in a bit,” I said quietly. She didn’t say a word, closing her eyes again with a miserable little sniff. I wanted her back in Chapel now. With fillies her age, fixing up the place. Playing with Allegro and Adagio. Having a better life than any other filly in Equestria. But this wasn’t Equestria. This wasn’t even the stable. This was the Wasteland, and I should just be happy she was alive. But I wanted to give her more...
等一下,"我平静地说。她一言不发，又闭上眼睛，可怜巴巴地轻轻嗅了一下。我希望她现在回到教堂。和小姑娘们一起装修房子。玩快板和慢板。过着比Equestria其他小母马都好的生活。但这里不是小马国。这里甚至不是马厩。这里是荒原，我应该为她还活着而感到高兴。但我想给她更多..。
What was the price of peace of mind in the Wasteland? Could I give her that?
在这荒原上，内心平静的代价是什么？我能把这个给她吗？
That indulgence?
那种放纵？
How could I not?
我怎么能不呢？
* * *
* * *
I told Triage what I needed. She couldn’t care less either way. I could have asked her to cut Scotch’s head off and stick it on a spike and she probably would have. She just made sure I understood that she’d be erasing everything from the tunnels to now. The story would be that she was injured in the tunnels. Glory nodded; Rampage muttered a ‘whatever’. Both would be present while Triage did the spell.
我告诉了伤检分类组我需要什么。不管怎样，她都不在乎。我本可以让她把苏格兰人的头砍下来，插在长钉上，她可能会这么做的。她只是想让我明白她会把从地道到现在的所有东西都抹掉。据说她是在隧道里受伤的。晨辉点点头;狂暴喃喃地说着'随便吧'。在分诊施法的时候，两个人都会在场。
That left P-21. Unfortunately, I had no idea where to find him... until I glanced out a window and was amazed to see him sitting with his back against a dead tree in the muddy quad as the rain drizzled down. I trotted out to him but slowed as I got a good look at him slouched there. I knew that slouch. He had a barely touched bottle of Wild Pegasus and an empty syringe of Med-X next to him; I guessed his leg still bothered him. “I thought this stuff was supposed to make you feel good,” he said as he nudged the bottle with a sour frown. “Just makes me feel sick.”
只剩下P-21。不幸的是，我不知道在哪里可以找到他......直到我向窗外瞥了一眼，惊奇地发现他背靠着一棵死树坐在泥泞的院子里，此时雨正下着。我向他小跑过去，但当我仔细看到他懒洋洋地站在那里时，速度慢了下来。我知道那个懒散的人。他身边有一个几乎没碰过的野飞马酒瓶和一个空的Med-X注射器;我猜他的腿还在困扰着他。"我以为这些东西会让你感觉很好,"他一边说一边酸酸地皱着眉头推了推瓶子。"只是让我觉得恶心。"
“You get used to it,” I replied as I carefully levitated the bottle. “You mind?” He groaned and gave a dismissive wave of his hoof. I pulled the cap off, took a pull, and then looked down the neck at the amber contents. It was like looking into a glass well of piss. I felt like I’d stepped across a mirror in that hole underground and now nothing was right. Glory had one wing. Rampage was pissed. The Goddess was back in spades. And I’d lost my happy friend for this blue lump.
"你会习惯的,"我一边回答，一边小心翼翼地把瓶子悬浮起来。"你介意吗?"他呻吟了一声，不屑地挥了挥蹄子。我拉下帽子，拉了一下，然后顺着脖子看了看里面的琥珀。就像看着一口尿井。我感觉自己好像在地下洞穴里踩到了一面镜子，现在一切都不对劲了。晨辉只有一个翅膀。狂暴被激怒了。女神回来了。为了这个蓝色的肿块，我失去了我快乐的朋友。
“Scotch Tape?” he asked softly as the rain pattered around us.
"透明胶带?"雨点打在我们身上，他轻声问道。
I tried to assemble a response, feeling that dull glow starting in my gut. Thank
我试图收集一个反应，感觉那种暗淡的光芒开始在我的肠道。谢谢
the Goddesses for that. “Asked for you,” I replied, seeing him wince in response. “You don’t have to worry about it now, though. Triage is altering her memories. As far as she’s concerned, you’re a stranger now.”
女神们。"我要见你,"我回答，看见他回答时退缩了。"不过，你现在不必担心这个问题。分诊正在改变她的记忆。对她来说，你现在是个陌生人了。"
“I always was,” he replied crossly. “I never wanted to father her.” He scowled at me; I snorted and took another drink, making his frown increase. Then I stood and started for the planetarium. “I never had a choice!” he shouted at me.
"我一直都是,"他生气地回答。"我从没想过要当她的父亲。"他怒视着我，我哼了一声，又喝了一口，使他皱起了眉头。然后我站起来，向天文馆出发。"我从来没有选择!"他冲我喊。
I rounded on him. “Yes, you did! Maybe not in 99, but you had one now!” Maybe it was the rain or the booze, but right this second I wasn’t taking it. “You could have been something to her. You could at least have been nice!” I hissed at him as I glared. “She never wanted to lose her mother, home, and everypony she knew. Damn it, you could have at least tried!”
我把他围了起来。"是的，你做到了！也许不是在99年，但你现在有一个了!"也许是因为下雨或者酗酒，但是此时此刻我没有接受。"你本来可以成为她的一些东西。你至少应该表现得友好一点!"我瞪着他，对他发出嘶嘶的声音。"她从来不想失去她的母亲，家庭，还有她认识的每一匹小马。该死的，你至少应该试试!"
He closed his eyes and laid his head back against the tree. He looked like a corpse. I sighed. What was I trying to do, make him feel even more like a shit? I could still see that mark around his throat. Even P-21 had a limit. I sighed. “Well, now you don’t have to worry about it. If you want to be her father, you tell her yourself. You don’t? Don’t.” I floated the bottle back into his hooves. “Take it from a booze pony like me, P-21. If you’re gonna drink, don’t do it out in the rain. Hangovers are bad enough without adding a head cold to the mix.” And with that, I turned again, leaving him under that dead tree and the hard, cold, Hoofington sky.
他闭上眼睛，把头靠在树上。他看起来像一具尸体。我叹了口气。我到底想做什么，让他觉得自己更像一坨屎？我仍然可以看到他喉咙周围的标记。即使是P-21也有极限。我叹了口气。"好了，现在你不用担心了。如果你想成为她的父亲，你自己告诉她。你不知道？不要。"我把瓶子放回它的蹄子里。"像我这样的酒鬼，P-21。如果你要喝酒，就别在外面下雨。宿醉已经够糟糕了，再加上感冒。"说完，我又转过身去，把他留在那棵枯树下，留在Hoofington坚硬、寒冷的天空下。
* * *
* * *
“So, if you were involved with Project Steelpony and Eternity, what was Eternity all about?” I asked as I sat in the planetarium. I still had questions and a choice to make.
"那么，如果你参与了Steelpony项目和Eternity，Eternity是什么?"我坐在天文馆里问道。我仍然有问题和选择要做。
“Eternity?” the flickering image said sourly. She’d been scanning the ruins to the east with some sort of bobbing sensors on top of the buildings, letting me get a look at the activity around the Skyport. I’d half hoped to catch a glimpse of Lighthooves there. “Eternity was a complete flop. Rarity micromanaged that project into the ground and wouldn’t let me get past setting her up at Hightower Jail.” The air above her came alive showing a number of pages of text that made little sense to me.
"永恒?"闪烁的影像酸溜溜地说。她一直在用建筑物顶部的某种浮动传感器扫描东边的废墟，让我能够看到飞机场周围的活动情况。我有点希望能在那里看到一点点光剑。"永恒是彻头彻尾的失败。稀有对这个项目进行了微观管理，不让我放过在海托华监狱安置她的机会。"她头顶上的空气活跃起来，显示出许多页对我来说毫无意义的文字。
“Why was Rarity managing it? Was it related to Image?”
"为什么是罕有管理它？这和形象有关吗?"
“If it was related to Image, Rarity wouldn’t have needed the O.I.A. She would have just done it herself.” She sighed and mused, more to herself than to me, “A way to keep her friends safe forever...”
"如果它和图像有关，稀有就不需要o.i.a.了。她会自己动手的。"她叹了口气，若有所思地说,"这是让她的朋友永远安全的办法......"
Forever. Sounded nice. Better than six months. “What’s it like?” I asked softly as I fiddled with my leg brace. She looked at me in surprise and a little confusion, so I elaborated. “To live longer than anypony, I mean?”
永远。听起来不错。总比六个月好。"感觉怎么样?"我一边轻轻地问，一边摆弄着我的腿支架。她惊讶地看着我，有点困惑，于是我详细说明。"我的意思是，比任何小马都长寿?"
Professor Zodiac smiled sadly. “I want to go to a Pony Joe’s and get a chocolate-dipped cinnamon ring with extra sprinkles. I know they don’t exist anymore. Haven’t for two hundred years, but there’s a part of me that’s always back there. I think about friends. Work. A vacation I was slated to take after the conference at Tenpony. You’d think it’d all fade away, or blur, or something… but it doesn’t. It just gets stretched out.”
十二宫教授悲伤地笑了。"我想去PonyJoe's买一个巧克力蘸肉桂戒指，上面多撒些巧克力粉。我知道他们已经不存在了。已经两百年没有了，但是有一部分的我一直在那里。我想到了朋友。工作。我计划在Tenpony的会议结束后去度假。你可能会认为这一切都会消失，或者模糊，或者其他什么......但事实并非如此。它只是被拉长了。"
“But how do you deal with the pain?” Again, she looked baffled. “I… I found a memory orb from Deus. He was in agony every moment.”
"但是你如何处理这种痛苦呢?"她又一次显得很困惑。"我.....。.我发现了一个来自上帝的记忆球。他每时每刻都处于痛苦之中。"
“Ah. Yes.” The flickering image hung her head a little. “It rather depends on the nature of the augmentation. Deus’s implants were invasive and the link to his nervous system was fairly crude. When I was forced to get my upgrades, a year of refinement had taken place. But it doesn’t feel… normal.”
"啊。是的。"忽隐忽现的影像把她的头稍微低了一下。"这在很大程度上取决于增资的性质。天王的植入物具有侵入性，与神经系统的联系相当粗糙。当我被迫升级时，经过了一年的改进。但这种感觉并不...正常。"
I regarded the flickering projection with a little sympathy. “Why’d you get them in the first place?”
我带着一点同情注视着忽隐忽现的投影。"你一开始为什么要买它们?"
“Oh. That.” She sighed. “Let’s just say that some ponies took Big Macintosh’s death quite personally and any held anyone with stripes culpable. I was accosted by a mob on my way home. It was quite unpleasant… and afterwards I needed a new heart... among other things. Fortunately, hearts were the first synthetic organ we’d made for Steelpony. After that, it was a gradual process of replacing this for that. New eyes. New lungs. Stronger legs and a reinforced hide. I never installed an augmentation I wouldn’t put in myself,” she said with a touch of pride.
"哦。那个。"她叹了口气。"这么说吧，有些小马把大麦金托什的死看成是针对个人的，任何有条纹的人都有责任。我在回家的路上被一群暴徒搭讪。这是相当不愉快的...后来我需要一个新的心脏...和其他东西。幸运的是，心脏是我们为Steelpony做的第一个人造器官。在那之后，这是一个逐渐替换这个的过程。新眼光。新的肺。强壮的腿和加固的皮革。我从来没有安装过我自己都不会安装的隆胸器,"她带着一丝自豪地说。
“Not even Deus? I don’t see hydraulics sticking out of you,” I replied. Why was I defending him? Deus had been a monster… but… did he really deserve all that for one mistake?
""连天王也没有吗？我没有看到液压系统从你身上伸出来,"我回答。我为什么要为他辩护？天王曾经是一个怪物......但是......他真的因为一个错误而受到这一切吗？
She looked at me and said levelly, “I am sorry for the pain I caused him, but
她看着我，平静地说:"我为我给他带来的痛苦感到抱歉，但是
Deus was a convicted rapist. I honestly did not expect him to survive the battle testing.” Boy, that was reassuring! “When he did, Goldenblood put him in stasis somewhere. The point was made. If things hadn’t exploded, I anticipate that all Steel Rangers would have been augmented into steelponies within a year. Why worry about power armor when you can become power armor?”
天王是一个被定罪的强奸犯。我真的没想到他能在战斗测试中幸存下来。"孩子，这真让人安心！"当他这么做的时候，金血王把他关在了某个地方。这一点已经得到了证实。如果事情没有发生爆炸，我预计所有的钢铁骑兵将在一年内被扩大成钢铁小马。既然你可以成为强力盔甲，为什么还要担心强力盔甲呢?"
“Probably because you can take power armor off and it doesn’t hurt all the time?” I suggested.
"可能是因为你可以卸下动力盔甲，而且不会一直受到伤害?"我建议道。
She rolled her glowing eyes. “You sound like Applejack.”
她转动着发光的眼睛。"你听起来像苹果白兰地。"
I sighed, pressing my lips together. Sanguine wanted Chimera to make new and interesting monsters. Zodiac seemed nicer, but I trusted her as far as I could throw that projector. Did the O.I.A. intentionally go after borderline nutjobs, or did working for Goldenblood turn them that way? I didn’t like thinking about what two hundred years in the Wasteland had done to her. “So, Trueblood wants to make monsters. What about you? Going to make an army of Deuses?”
我叹了口气，紧闭双唇。桑吉尼希望奇美拉制造新的有趣的怪物。十二宫似乎更好，但我信任她，只要我可以扔投影仪。究竟是o.i.a.故意针对那些濒临疯狂的工作，还是为Goldenblood工作让他们变成了疯子？我不愿意去想在荒原生活的两百年对她做了什么。"所以，特鲁布拉德想要制造怪物。你呢？要组建一支杜塞尔军队吗?"
“Monsters? Is he still going on about that?” Zodiac said with a sad smile. “All that ‘endless possibilities and biological potential’ garbage?” The glowing projection shook her head sadly.
"怪物？他还在唠叨那件事吗?"十二宫带着悲伤的微笑说。"所有那些'无尽的可能性和生物潜力'的垃圾?"发光的投影悲伤地摇了摇头。
I blinked. “Are you saying that he wouldn’t do that?”
我眨了眨眼。"你是说他不会那么做吗?"
“Oh, eventually. Probably. But I doubt that that’s what truly drives him,” she said with a sigh. “But as for making more Deuses, no. I don’t want Steelpony to win a war two centuries over that was pointless in the first place. Very simply, I want out of this jar,” the projection said as she trotted to the metal cylinder and soundlessly gave it a soft tap. “You probably noticed my meat parts, but the reality is that I’m in bad shape. My repair talisman, which is responsible for rebuilding damaged components, needs to be reactivated. With that fixed, I could repair my internal healing talisman. With that fixed, I could get out of this bathtub. Otherwise, this jar isn’t just my prison, it’s my casket too. Five years… ten… fifteen…”
"哦，最终会的。可能吧。但我怀疑这才是他真正的动力,"她叹了口气说。""但是，至于制造更多的杜塞尔，没有。我不希望Steelpony赢得两个世纪的战争，这是毫无意义的摆在首位。很简单，我想从这个罐子里出去。"当她小跑到那个金属圆柱面前，轻轻地敲了一下。"你可能注意到了我身上的肉块，但事实是我的身体状况很糟糕。我的修理护身符，负责重建损坏的部件，需要重新激活。有了这个修复，我就可以修复我体内的治疗神器了。这个修好了，我就可以离开这个浴缸了。否则，这个罐子不仅仅是我的监狱，它也是我的棺材。五年...十年...十五年..."
“So you’re in the same boat I’m in,” I muttered.
"所以你和我在同一条船上,"我喃喃自语。
She looked at me with a slightly sympathetic smile. “I suppose, but I’ve at least had a decade to come to terms with it. To the well prepared mind, death is nothing to fear. Of course, after years in this jar...” The glowing projection
她带着一丝同情的微笑看着我。"我想是的，但我至少有十年的时间来接受这个事实。对于准备充分的人来说，死亡没有什么可怕的。当然，在这个罐子里呆了年之后......"
sighed. “To be honest, I owe you an apology. You see, I was the one who told Sanguine that EC-1101’s routing ended at your stable.”
叹息。"说实话，我欠你一个道歉。是我告诉桑吉纳EC-1101的路由在你的马厩结束的。"
“What… you’re… you…” I spluttered, trying to get a handle on my anger. “How could you?”
"什么......你......你......"我语无伦次地说，试图控制住自己的愤怒。"你怎么能这样?"
“It was my only hope to get out of here,” she replied firmly. “Would you turn down the only hope at getting your life back? I had no idea that Stable 99 was intact. Most of the stables were complete failures, so I saw little point in not telling him.” That helped me get my emotions under control. It wasn’t like Zodiac had gone out of her way to screw 99. “He gave me the usual sales pitch… find EC-1101, use it to force open Chimera and Steelpony... So six months ago I tracked down the data paths with the help of the Collegiate. Of course, as soon as I told him where to find it, he cut off contact.”
"这是我离开这里的唯一希望,"她坚定地回答。"你会放弃让你的生活回到正轨的唯一希望吗？我不知道Stable99是完整的。大多数马厩都是彻底的失败，所以我认为不告诉他没有什么意义。"这帮助我控制了我的情绪。这并不是十二宫杀手特意去干掉99。"他给了我通常的推销说辞......找到EC-1101，用它强行打开Chimera和Steelpony......所以六个月前，我在Collegiate的帮助下追踪了数据路径。当然，我一告诉他在哪儿能找到，他就切断了联系。"
“But if you were to get out… are you saying you wouldn’t return to your research?” I said skeptically.
"但如果你要离开......你是说你不会回去继续你的研究了吗?"我怀疑地说。
The glowing pony smiled, cocking her head as she rolled her eyes a bit. “Oh, perhaps. One day. But it would take years to set up new augmentation production. Maybe a decade to get production scaled up to the point where it could help the Wasteland.” She sighed softly. “Funny, when the six of us came out here after so long, I was so eager to return and find out what became of the O.I.A. and Steelpony. Now I wish we hadn’t.” She shook her head. “This city has a way of tempting you with exactly what you want.”
这匹发光的小马微笑着，眼睛转了一下，抬起了头。"哦，也许吧。总有一天。但是要建立新的扩大生产需要几年的时间。也许需要十年时间才能把生产规模扩大到能够帮助荒地的程度。"她轻轻地叹了口气。"有趣的是，过了这么久，我们六个人来到这里，我是如此渴望回到这里，看看o.i.a.和Steelpony后来怎么样了。现在我倒希望我们没有这么做。"她摇了摇头。"这座城市有办法用你想要的东西来诱惑你。"
“You were with Big Daddy!” I blurted.
"你和老爹在一起!"我脱口而出。
She chuckled and nodded. “And Awesome, Crunchy Carrots, Finders Keepers, and little Dawn. Six friends trying to save Hoofington.” She sighed and shook her head. “Such a horrible time. So much killing and for nothing. And eventually we turned on each other.” She looked at me and her eyes seemed to turn soft. “You care for your friends, don’t you?”
她咯咯地笑了笑，点了点头。"还有棒极了、嘎吱嘎吱响的胡萝卜、捡到的人和小小的黎明。六个朋友试图拯救胡芬顿。"她叹了口气，摇了摇头。"真是可怕的时刻。杀了那么多人却一无所获。最终我们反目成仇。"她看着我，她的眼睛似乎变得柔和了。"你关心你的朋友，不是吗?"
I nodded.
我点点头。
“Then leave this place. Spend what remains of your life somewhere else. Hoofington destroys everything around it. It consumes friendship as readily as life. Go to Tenpony. New Appleloosa. Friendship City. Stalliongrad. Trottingham. Even Fillydelphia… but get out of here as fast as you can and don’t
"那就离开这个地方。把你剩余的生命花在别的地方。胡芬顿摧毁了周围的一切。它像消耗生命一样消耗友谊。去天波尼吧。新appllooosa。友谊之城。Stalliongrad.特罗廷汉姆。即使是填充的吗啡...但是尽快离开这里，你可以和不
look back.”
回头看"
“But… what made you split up?” I asked softly. The projection went still for a long moment, frozen in place.
"但是......你们为什么分手?"我轻声问道。投影静止了很长一段时间，凝固在原地。
Zodiac looked back at me, and her lips curled in a little smile. “Sorry, Blackjack, but I usually don’t talk this much, and I think the projector’s getting overheated. Why don’t you come back tomorrow?” she asked, and the big machine flickered and went dark. Big secret? Painful memory? Both? I paused at the entrance and gave a look back over my shoulder, my eyes lingering on that metal cylinder.
黄道带回头看着我，她的嘴唇微微一笑。"对不起，黑杰克，我通常不说这么多话，而且我觉得放映机过热了。你为什么不明天再来?"她问道，然后那台大机器闪烁着，变成了黑暗。大秘密？痛苦的回忆？两者都是？我在入口处停了下来，回头看了一眼，眼睛盯着那个金属圆筒。
* * *
* * *
I needed to think, which was a bad sign. I’d spent most of my life not thinking about things. My time in Hoofington had changed all that. Now I couldn’t stop thinking, and my poor mutated brain kept tumbling over and over again. If only I was able to dig through all the stuff rolling around inside my head for something useful… like what I was going to do now.
我需要思考，这是一个不好的征兆。我一生中的大部分时间都不去想这些事情。我在Hoofington的经历改变了这一切。现在我无法停止思考，我可怜的变异大脑一次又一次地翻滚着。要是我能挖掘出脑海中翻滚的所有东西，找到有用的东西就好了......比如我现在要做什么。
Think. Think think think. What would the Stable Dweller do? “Sheeee’d… cast a failproof failsafe spell that would instantly make the right choice just pop right out at her. And then she’d hop into her magic flying tank and do it! ‘Cause she actually knows how to do this heroic crap!” I said with a grin. I slumped. Once more, the vast gulf between the Stable Dweller and myself loomed inside me.
想想。思考，思考，思考。马厩居民会怎么做？"她......施放了一个失败的保险咒语，这个咒语会立刻让她做出正确的选择。然后她就会跳进她那神奇的飞行坦克里去做！"因为她真的知道怎么做这种英雄主义的废话!"我咧嘴笑着说。我垂头丧气。再一次，马厩居民和我之间的巨大鸿沟在我心中隐约可见。
Well, I could try to find out what somepony who knew what she was doing was doing, at least. Not that it was likely to get anything done, but it wasn’t as if I had a better idea. I turned on my PipBuck radio and started to pace. It wasn’t long before the music stopped and DJ Pon3’s voice burst out of with news about the Stable Dweller. Clearly, Homage must have been a fan. So, the Stable Dweller… was all the way down in Fillydelphia?! And apparently she’d just screwed over Red Eye and reestablished DJ Pon3’s eyes and ears down in the city! I expected at any moment to hear about how she’d personally and literally punted Red Eye right out of town, but Homage just gave another thank you and put on more music.
至少我可以试着找出那些知道自己在做什么的小马。并不是说这样做可能会有什么效果，而是说我并没有什么更好的主意。我打开我的PipBuck收音机，开始踱步。没过多久，音乐就停止了，DJPon3的声音爆发出来，带来了关于马厩居民的消息。显然，《致敬》一定是一个粉丝。那么，马厩居民...一直在Fillydelphia?！很显然，她刚刚毁掉了红眼，重新建立了DJPon3在城市的眼睛和耳朵！我本以为随时都会听到她是如何亲自把红眼酒吧踢出城外的，但《致敬》只是给了另一个感谢，并播放了更多的音乐。
Was it just me, or did Homage have a… nah. Though… a super unicorn mare capable of doing all that? Heck, I’d be a bit moist in the… “Uggghhh! None of this is helping, Blackjack!”
难道只有我，还是《致敬》有一个。.不。尽管...一匹超级独角兽母马能做到这一切？哎呀，我会有点潮湿在......"Uggghhh！这些都没用，黑杰克!"
I needed to make a choice. I hated making choices. In 99, my choice was ‘Do what I am told’. Outside, it was ‘Get away from Deus’. For a while, it was ‘Find out what EC-1101 is’. Now it was ‘Try not to get anypony killed’.
我需要做出选择。我讨厌做出选择。在99年，我的选择是'照我说的做'。外面，是'离天王远点'。有一段时间，它是"找出EC-1101是什么"。现在是"尽量不要害死任何小马"。
And, if I was honest, ‘Don’t die in six months’ was really up there too.
而且，如果我是诚实的,'不要在六个月内死去'也真的在那里。
“Try to think what you should do, Blackjack…” I said as I trotted through one of the Collegiate buildings.
"想想你该怎么做，黑杰克......"我边说边小跑着穿过一座学院大楼。
“What about what Security would do?” I heard a voice mutter. I looked around. I was in some kind of gymnasium; there was a swimming pool full of murky water that looked more than a little unhealthy, but next to it were two bathtubs. Big beautiful basins brimming with steamy water. Oooh, whatever pony had invented self-heating bathtub talismans, thank you!
"那么安全部门会怎么做呢?"我听到一个声音咕哝着。我环顾四周。我在一个类似体育馆的地方，那里有一个装满浑水的游泳池，看起来非常不健康，但旁边有两个浴缸。大大的漂亮的盆子里充满了蒸腾的水。哦，不管是什么小马发明了自热浴缸护身符，谢谢！
“Well… first of all… I know what Security would do.” I tested my horn’s magic; it seemed like it was finally starting to return, at least for basic telekinesis. Then I shucked my barding and my braces and… flopped… into the nearest unoccupied basin. These tubs were clearly ‘Big Macintosh’ sized; I didn’t even take up the entire thing! I lay my head back and stared up at the roof.
"嗯......首先......我知道保安会怎么做。"我测试了我的号角的魔力，它似乎终于开始回来了，至少在基本的心灵遥感方面。然后我脱下护栏和支撑物，扑通一声掉进了最近的空盆里。这些浴缸显然是大麦金塔大小，我甚至没有采取整个事情！我仰起头，凝视着屋顶。
Blackjack was a frayed bundle of neurotic impulses. The Stable Dweller was a pony too awesome to really imagine. What about Security? I hadn’t thought of that identity in a while, the one manufactured by Homage’s imagination… but in the end, ponies around Hoofington didn’t care about Blackjack. Hell, Blackjack had almost speared a doctor’s throat. Security wouldn’t have ever done that.
黑杰克是一大堆神经质的冲动。马厩居民是一匹令人敬畏的小马，难以想象。安全问题呢？我有一段时间没有想到那个身份，那个由《向往》想象出来的身份......但是最后，Hoofington周围的小马并不在乎黑杰克。该死，Blackjack差点刺穿了一个医生的喉咙。保安不会这么做的。
Security saved ponies. Mom had told me that back when I believed it to be true. Security wanted to save Hoofington and everypony who could be saved. Ponies who followed the most basic laws like ‘Don’t kill other ponies just because you want to’ deserved a chance to have a safe life. Security would trust her friends to take care of themselves, help them if they asked for it, and not agonize about dying in months when she could die tomorrow.
保安拯救了小马。当我相信这是真的的时候，妈妈告诉过我。保安想救胡芬顿和每一个可以被救的小马。那些遵守最基本法则的小马，比如"不要仅仅因为你想要杀死其他小马"，应该得到一个过上安全生活的机会。保安会相信她的朋友们会照顾好自己，如果他们要求帮助，就会帮助他们，而不会为几个月后她可能明天就会死去而感到痛苦。
“But would Security help Professor Zodiac?” I muttered.
"但是安全局会帮助十二宫杀手教授吗?"我咕哝着。
“I sure hope so!”
"我当然希望如此!"
I blinked at a pony… thing peeking at me from the other side of the tub. It was half pony, but the other half looked like… like an eel or snake or fish… thing! It
我眨着眼睛看着一匹小马......它从浴缸的另一边偷看我。这是一半的小马，但另一半看起来像...像鳗鱼或蛇或鱼...的东西！它
had a webbed spine for a mane, and though it had forehooves of a sort, there was another smaller spined webbing along the backs of her limbs. The soft pink pony… thing… smiled warily at my expression.
它有一个带蹼的脊柱作为鬃毛，虽然它有某种前蹄，但在她的四肢后面还有一个较小的带状网。柔软的粉红色小马......的东西......对我的表情警惕地微笑。
Then another one popped out of the tub next to me, this one turquoise, and leaned over with a wide, pony-eating smile. “Boo!”
然后另一只从我旁边的浴缸里蹦了出来，这只绿松石色的，俯下身来，脸上露出了吃马肉的笑容。"嘘!"
“AHH!” It was some sort of monsterponies! Taint monsters! They were gonna eat me! My horn flashed as it tried to shoot my magic bullet spell. It really tried! The flickering ball of light struck the turquoise pony in the face with a zap that blackened her face with soot. She stared at me and coughed a little cloud of smoke before flopping back beneath the water with a groan.
"啊!"那是某种怪物！可恶的怪物！他们要吃了我！我的号角在试图发出我的魔术子弹咒语时闪闪发光。它真的很努力！闪烁的光球打在那匹绿松石色的小马的脸上，把她的脸熏黑了。她盯着我，咳了一小口烟，然后呻吟着跌入水中。
“Capri!” the pink one shouted and jumped from the tub I occupied into the tub beside me with shocking grace. I flopped about, trying to climb out and get my gun, but instead I floundered and flopped in the slippery metal tub. The pink one cradled the other pony in her hoof… flipper… things. “Sagi warned us not to mess with Security!”
"卡普里!"那个粉红色的大叫着，从我占据的浴缸里跳进我身边的浴缸，优雅得令人震惊。我跌跌撞撞地走来走去，试图爬出来拿我的枪，但是我却在光滑的金属浴缸里挣扎挣扎。粉红色的那只用蹄子抱着另一匹小马......脚蹼......什么的。"沙吉警告我们不要扰乱安全!"
“Who… what… how...?” I babbled, pointing my right hoof at them. Then I saw the hurt in the pink one’s red eyes and sighed. Okay, freaking out not helping anypony. “Sorry. I didn’t know these tubs were... occupied.”
"谁......什么......怎么......?"我胡言乱语，用右蹄指着他们。然后我看到了那个粉红色眼睛的伤害，叹了口气。好吧，因为不帮助任何小马而抓狂。"对不起。我不知道这些浴缸被...占用了。"
“That’s okay… most ponies don’t come down here, anyway. Sagi and Virgo, mostly,” the pink one said shyly. “I’m Pisces. This is Capri. Well, Capricorn, but she doesn’t like being called that.”
"没关系......反正大多数小马都不会来这里。大部分是沙吉和处女座,"那个粉红色的害羞地说。"我是双鱼座。这是卡普里。好吧，摩羯座，但她不喜欢别人这么叫她。"
“Blackjack,” I replied, feeling adrenaline giving way to shock, and even that wasn’t lasting long as Capri recovered. The turquoise pony ran her hoof… flipper… thing… along her bright blue spines. “Sorry about blasting you,” I said. She had a sort of rubbery hide that transitioned to small scales halfway down her body.
"黑杰克,"我回答，感觉肾上腺素让位于冲击，即使这样也没有持续多久，卡普里恢复了。那匹绿松石色的小马跑着它的蹄子......鳍状物......沿着它明亮的蓝色脊椎。"很抱歉打了你,"我说。她有一种橡胶般的皮肤，在身体的一半处变成了小鳞片。
“You’re sorry? I’m sorry I forgot you could do it. Pretty sensible reaction, if you ask me,” Capri said as she washed her face off in the tub. “Do I still have my eyebrows?”
"你说对不起？对不起，我忘了你可以做这件事。如果你问我的话，我会说这是相当明智的反应,"卡普瑞一边在浴缸里洗脸，一边说。"我的眉毛还在吗?"
“What are eyebrows?” Pisces asked with a little frown. Capri just sighed, shaking her head with a little groan.
"眉毛是什么?"双鱼皱着眉头问道。卡普瑞只是叹了口气，摇了摇头，呻吟了一声。
Okay. These were Zodiacs… right? Chimera monsterponies? Something… else? “Um… if you don’t mind me asking… what are you?” I gave the best smile I could.
好吧。这些是黄道带，对吧？奇美拉怪兽？还有别的事吗？"嗯......如果你不介意我问的话......你是什么人?"我给出了最好的微笑。
Capri smiled broadly. “Well now, that’s a great question, isn’t it? What are we? Are we perhaps the vanguard of the royal seapony invasion force, coming forth to establish ties with the land ponies? Are you prepared to submit to the rule of the great Oceanus and his mighty leviathan?” That set off a few fuses in my brain, not least of which was wondering what a leviathan was. Capri continued on. “Or maybe we’re the result of some super secret military naval program to make seaponies to swim into zebra harbors and blow stuff up? Or we’re taint super mutants with powers beyond your--”
卡普瑞笑得很开心。""好吧，这是一个很好的问题，不是吗？我们是什么？我们也许是皇家海港入侵部队的先锋，前来与陆地小马建立联系？你准备好服从伟大的海神和他强大的利维坦的统治了吗?"这在我的脑子里引起了一些火花，尤其是想知道什么是利维坦。卡普瑞继续说道。"或者我们也许是某些超级秘密的海军计划的结果，这些计划使得海港可以游进斑马港并炸掉东西？或者我们是超级变种人，超越了你的能力--"
“We ran into killing joke,” Pisces said softly.
"我们开了个杀人的玩笑,"双鱼轻声说。
Capri immediately slumped against the wall of the tub. “You always give away the ending, Sis.”
卡普瑞立刻倒在浴缸的墙上。"你总是泄露结局，姐姐。"
“Sis?”
"姐姐?"
“Right. Sister. As in sibling. As in related to by blood. All ponies were in our village in Ghastly Gorge,” the turquoise water pony said. “As for killing joke...
"对。姐姐。就像兄弟姐妹一样。与血缘有关的。所有的小马都在我们村庄的恐怖峡谷,"绿松石色的小马说。"至于杀人笑话.....。
well, it’s a blue vine you can find here and there. None around Hoofington, thank the Goddesses. One time I’m glad almost nothing grows here. But if it touches you… well… it likes to play jokes on you.”
到处都是蓝色的藤蔓。在Hoofington周围没有，感谢女神。有一次我很高兴这里几乎什么都没有生长。但如果它触动了你......好吧......它喜欢跟你开玩笑。"
Pisces nodded. “That usually get you killed.”
双鱼座点点头。"这通常会让你送命。"
“A vine that plays… jokes?” I needed to scavenge a box of brain fuses. Here I was almost convinced that maybe I’d found out all the messed up stuff around the Wasteland.
"会开玩笑的葡萄藤?"我需要清理一箱脑保险丝。在这里，我几乎确信，也许我已经发现了荒原周围所有乱七八糟的东西。
“Well, to elaborate, once I said to Sis, ‘Gee Sis, wouldn’t it be great to be a sea pony?’ to which Sis replied…” and she pointed her hoof flipper at the pink pony.
"好吧，详细说明一下，有一次我对姐姐说,'姐姐，当一匹海马不是很棒吗?'姐姐回答道......"她用蹄蹼指着那匹粉红色的小马。
“Shoo be doo… Shoo shoo be doo,” Pisces said with a little smile. “That’s from the sea pony song,” she said with a little nod.
"嘘，嘘，嘘，嘘，嘘，嘘，嘘，嘘。"双鱼座微笑着说。"这是海马的歌,"她点了点头说。
“So one day we were starving and decided to find our way into the Everfree looking for something non-radioactive and un-poisonous to eat… not one of my
"所以有一天，我们正在挨饿，于是决定去Everfree寻找一些没有放射性、无毒的食物.....
smarter choices, in retrospect… and we came across killing joke. It burst out of the ground and played its joke by turning both of us into this,” she said with a broad smile. “By the way, did I mention that we were miles from any water source?”
回想起来，是更明智的选择，我们遇到了杀人的笑话。它突然从地里钻出来，把我们俩都变成了这样，开了个玩笑。"她笑容满面地说。"顺便问一下，我有没有提到我们离任何水源都有数英里之遥?"
“That’s the killing part,” Pisces pointed out.
"这就是杀戮的部分,"双鱼指出。
“So, yeah, we flopped around the Everfree… drying out… crawling on our bellies… really not happy with life. We finally found a pond we could wet ourselves in.”
"所以，是的，我们在Everfree四处游荡...逐渐干涸...匍匐前进...对生活真的很不满意。我们终于找到了一个可以让我们自己湿身的池塘。"
“That was full of radigators,” the pink pony pointed out.
"那里到处都是散热器,"粉红色的小马指出。
Capri rolled her eyes with a soft snort. “Which was full of radigators. Fortunately, the joke gave us a few little tricks that let us drive them off… probably an accident on its part. We eventually flopped and flipped our way to a creek and just followed it downstream. Went underground for a while, then eventually ended up in what turned out to be the Hoofington Reservoir. That’s when we came across other ponies.”
卡普瑞轻轻地哼了一声，转了转眼睛。"里面全是散热器。幸运的是，这个笑话给了我们一些小技巧，让我们把它们赶走了......可能是它的一个意外。我们最终跌跌撞撞地来到一条小溪旁，顺流而下。转入地下一段时间后，最终到达了胡芬顿水库。就在那时，我们遇到了其它小马。"
“Mean ponies,” Pisces said with a shiver.
"吝啬的小马驹,"双鱼座颤抖着说。
“Raiders?” I asked with sympathy. Capri snorted with a scowl.
"夺宝奇兵?"我同情地问。卡普瑞皱着眉头哼了一声。
“No. Fancy high to do Society ponies,” she said with a flick of her tail. “Caught us in a net and threw us in a jar. They took us to be a part of some menagerie… fancy name for a zoo. Stayed like that for six months. The Society’d rap on the glass to make us move around. All… the… time…” she said through grit teeth.
"没有。她甩了甩尾巴，说:"这是上流社会的小马。"。"用网子抓住我们，把我们扔进罐子里。他们把我们当成动物园的一部分...动物园的好名字。就这样呆了六个月。学会敲击玻璃，让我们四处走动。所有的...时间..."她咬着牙说。
Pisces whimpered, covering her ears. “I don’t want to remember the tapping. They just wouldn’t stop!”
双鱼呜咽着，捂住她的耳朵。"我不想记得敲击声。他们就是停不下来!"
Capri hugged her. I wanted to do that myself. “Anyway, Professor Zodiac found out about us and paid a whole bunch of caps to King Jackass to let us go. She had to give up something really valuable that she said was hers, too. But she said that nopony should be locked up for looking strange.” I thought of a zony trying to teach in an empty lecture hall.
卡普瑞拥抱了她。我自己也想这么做。"不管怎样，十二宫教授发现了我们的事，付了一大笔钱给傻瓜王让我们走。她不得不放弃一些真正有价值的东西，她说这些东西也是她的。但是她说不能因为小马长得奇怪就把它关起来。"我想到一个疯子在一个空荡荡的讲堂里教书。
“So now you’re Zodiacs?” Pisces smiled and nodded.
"所以你现在是十二宫杀手了?"双鱼微笑着点点头。
“That’s what Sagittarius said. He was the one who told the professor about us being in Awesome’s menagerie.” The pink sea pony flushed at Capri’s glower. “I mean… King Jackass!” That mollified the turquoise sea pony a little bit.
"射手座也是这么说的。就是他告诉教授我们进了牛叉动物园。"那只粉红色的海马被卡普瑞的怒视冲得通红。"我的意思是......蠢货大王!"这使那只绿松石色的海马平静了一点。
Capri leaned against the back of tub, and on her rump I saw an odd symbol: a zodiac magical tattoo like the decals we’d worn leaving Megamart... wow, that seemed too long ago. “Now we do whatever we can to help out here. Sometimes we catch bounties if they live near water. Sometimes we scavenge sunken wreckage. One good thing about being like this is that we don’t seem to get any more mutated by taint or the crud in the water.” She looked at the pink sea pony. “We’re going out to the bay soon. Gonna see if we can pull something useful off the Luna.”
卡普瑞靠在浴缸的后面，在她的臀部我看到了一个奇怪的符号:一个黄道带的神奇纹身，就像我们离开超级市场时穿的贴纸......哇，那好像是很久以前的事了。"现在我们尽我们所能来帮助这里。有时候，如果他们住在水边，我们就会抓住他们。有时我们搜寻沉没的残骸。这样的一个好处是，我们似乎不会因为污染或水中的脏物而发生更多的变异。"她看着那匹粉红色的海马。"我们很快就要去海湾了。看看能不能从月神号上找到点有用的东西。"
“That sunken battleship?” I asked, and she nodded. “You can’t tell me there’s useful stuff on that wreck!”
"那艘沉没的战舰?"我问道，她点了点头。"你不能告诉我那个残骸上有什么有用的东西!"
“Plenty!” she laughed. “All kinds of talismans still intact. Tons of equipment that’s still sorta useful. That ship had so many enchantments protecting it that it took years before it finally sank. Barely any rust on it at all, in spite of all the saltwater.”
"很多!"她笑了。"所有的护身符都完好无损。大量的设备还是有点用的。那艘船有许多保护它的魔法，以至于它花了好几年才最终沉没。尽管有那么多的盐水，它几乎没有生锈。"
“So if I found that killing joke stuff…” I speculated, rubbing my chin. “I’d love to be a taint-free, two-eyed, non-jellylegged pony again...” I said to myself and any killing joke I might encounter in the future.
"所以，如果我发现那个杀人笑话的东西......"我推测，摩擦我的下巴。"我想再次成为一个没有污点的、两眼的、没有软腿的矮种马......"我对自己说，以及我将来可能遇到的任何杀人笑话。
“You’d be an idiot and dead,” Capri said flatly. “Killing joke doesn’t help ponies. Ever. It screws them. You can’t say ‘I’d love to be Princess Celestia’ and dive in… because it’ll mutate you into an alicorn that can’t do magic and fly or something. Or turn you into a two-hundred-year-dead copy of the Princess. Or do something you said back when you were a filly. Trust me, you are not the first pony to think of using killing joke to do something cool.”
"你这个白痴，死定了,"卡普瑞直截了当地说。"杀人笑话对小马毫无帮助。永远不会。这会给他们带来麻烦。你不能说'我愿意成为塞莱斯蒂亚公主'然后一头扎进去......因为它会把你变成一个不会变魔术、不会飞之类的怪物。或者把你变成一个死了两百年的公主。或者做一些你小时候说的事情。相信我，你不是第一个想到用杀人笑话来做酷事的小马。"
I blew a raspberry. “And once more reality squashes what would otherwise be a completely awesome plan.”
我吹了一个覆盆子。"现实再一次粉碎了原本完美的计划。"
“Yeah,” Pisces said with a sigh. “If it wasn’t for stupid reality, we could have chocolate milk rain and cotton candy clouds.” I sighed as well. Wouldn’t that be awesome? Rivers of Wild Pegasus. Sugar Apple Bomb bushes… “Hey. Quick question,” I said as I looked at the pair. “Why’d the Zodiacs go
"是啊,"双鱼叹了口气说。"如果不是愚蠢的现实，我们可能会有巧克力牛奶雨和棉花糖云。"我也叹了口气。那不是很棒吗？野生飞马的河流。糖苹果炸弹灌木丛......"嘿。问个小问题,"我看着他们俩说。"为什么黄道带会消失
after me and my PipBuck?”
在我和我的PipBuck之后?"
Capri shrugged. “Sagi’s idea. He heard that the professor needed it really badly.” She folded her hoof flippers under her chin. “He’s the oldest Zodiac, so he’s kinda in charge. The idea was it’d be a surprise or something.”
卡普瑞耸耸肩。"Sagi的主意。他听说教授非常需要它。"她把蹄子放在下巴下面。"他是最年长的十二宫杀手，所以他算是负责人。我的想法是，这将是一个惊喜或什么的。"
Pisces nodded. “Libra spilled the beans, though.”
双鱼座点点头。"不过，天秤座说漏了嘴。"
Capri shivered. “Professor was so pissed… I don’t think I’ve ever seen her so mad before.” The turquoise pony looked at me with a sympathetic look. “She said you’d never help her now.”
卡普里打了个寒颤。"教授很生气......我以前从没见过她这么生气。"那匹绿松石色的小马用同情的眼神看着我。"她说你现在再也不会帮她了。"
That lined up with what I’d heard from the professor herself. “Well, it sure doesn’t help,” I muttered. I lifted the leg braces with my faltering magic and tied them on my forelimbs.
这和我从教授那里听到的是一致的。"好吧，这肯定没什么用,"我咕哝着说。我用我摇摇欲坠的魔法举起了腿支架，把它绑在我的前肢上。
“Does that mean that you’re thinking about it?” Pisces suddenly arced back into the tub I occupied and gave me a very squishy hug. “Please help her! Please. I know she’s creepy and freaky and strange but she’s the only pony who’s been good to me and Sis. Please!” Oh, wasn’t this awkward?
"这是否意味着你正在考虑这件事?"双鱼座突然回到我占据的浴缸，给了我一个非常柔软的拥抱。"请帮帮她！求你了。我知道她令人毛骨悚然、古怪、奇怪，但她是唯一一个对我和妹妹好的小马。求你了!"这不是很尴尬吗？
“Pisces!” Capri said, and her tail slipped out to smack the back of her sister’s head. The pink sea pony went even redder, flushing and bowing her head in embarrassment. “Sorry. She’s like that…” then the turquoise mare tapped her hoof fins together as she chewed on her bottom lip. “But… if you did decide to help the professor…”
"双鱼座!"卡普瑞说着，她的尾巴溜了出来，打在了妹妹的后脑勺上。粉红色的海马变得更红了，脸红了，尴尬地低下了头。"对不起。她就是这样......"然后，那头绿松石色的母马一边咬着下嘴唇，一边用蹄鳍轻轻敲打着。"但是......如果你决定帮助教授......"
I sighed and slipped from the tub, putting on my last two braces. “Yeah. Like I said, I’m thinking about it.” And if my answer was no, then I’d better be well gone from here before giving it.
我叹了口气，从浴缸里溜了出来，戴上了最后两副牙套。"是的。就像我说的，我正在考虑。"如果我的回答是否定的，那么我最好在给出答案之前离开这里。
* * *
* * *
What is the Goddess’s interest in Blackjack? Your question is so simplistic that it makes one wonder why you would bother to waste the Goddess’s time with it!
女神对黑杰克有什么兴趣？你的问题是如此的简单，以至于让人想知道你为什么要费心在这上面浪费女神的时间！
Our first interest is the interest that We have for all of ponykind: elevating and preserving all ponies through Unity in the Goddess. We know that through Unity, ponykind will be transformed into a state of being perfectly suited to thrive in this wasteland. Once a hoofful of trivial complications are resolved, We will give
我们首先感兴趣的是我们对所有种类的小马的兴趣:通过女神中的统一来提升和保护所有的小马。我们知道，通过团结，ponykind将转变成一个完全适合在这个荒原兴旺发达的状态。一旦一些琐碎的并发症得到解决，我们将给予
all of ponydom a safe and prosperous future in Us.
所有的庞然大物在美国有一个安全和繁荣的未来。
However, We are also interested in Blackjack for her capability and her determination. The Goddess appreciates ponies of mettle and fortitude, and she has demonstrated that she excels in both areas. Despite her copious flaws, she has managed to persevere against tremendous odds and yet seems to consider them quite ordinary. She seems hopelessly unaware that only a few ponies could face what she encounters daily and still continue onward. Such traits are... valuable.
然而，我们也对她的能力和决心感兴趣。女神欣赏小马的勇气和坚韧，她已经证明了她在这两个领域的优势。尽管她有很多缺点，但她还是设法克服重重困难坚持下来，然而她似乎认为这些缺点很平常。她似乎无可救药地没有意识到，只有几匹小马能够面对她每天遇到的事情，而且还能继续前进。这些特质...很有价值。
Thus, the Goddess’s interest in her is the same as anypony’s: how can We use her to achieve Our goals? Is that not how all heroes are eventually exploited?
因此，女神对她的兴趣和其他小马一样:我们如何利用她来实现我们的目标？难道这不是所有英雄最终被利用的方式吗？
* * *
* * *
Saying it was about to rain in Hoofington was like saying the Wild Pegasus would run out: it was inevitable and dreaded at the same time. Triage was in the middle of the procedure. P-21 was somewhere… Rampage wasn’t speaking to me… Lacunae was meeting with the professor. That left me and Glory with nowhere to go, nothing to do, and nopony shooting at us. I’d found a window and was staring at the gray world outside while she calmly did some maintenance on Vigilance beside me, replacing the firing pin with one from a battered ten millimeter IF-21 Caramel.
说Hoofington将要下雨，就像说野生帕伽索斯马将要耗尽一样:这是不可避免的，同时也是可怕的。分诊正在进行中。P-21在某个地方......狂暴没有和我说话......空隙正在和教授见面。这让我和晨辉无处可去，无事可做，也没有小马朝我们开枪。我找到了一扇窗户，凝视着窗外的灰色世界，而她冷静地在我旁边给"时刻警惕"(Vigilance)做一些维护工作，把撞针换成了一个用破旧的10毫米IF-21焦糖制成的撞针。
Where’d I pick up that gun? Red Eye’s goons? Scavenged it? Was it from the tunnels? I couldn’t remember any more. So many damn fights. So damned tired of fighting. And yet I couldn’t stop. Who knew how long I had before I died… no, not even that. Ponies died of cancer in 99. It was rare and horrible, watching them struggle for months. Weeks. Days. Bodies falling apart as they fought for one more day before either the disease killed them or they begged for the needle. Now that was me. Would I last months before the taint crippled me? Weeks before tumors devoured my organs? Days?
我在哪儿捡到的枪？红眼的暴徒？捡来的？是从地道里来的吗？我不记得更多了。这么多该死的比赛。我已经厌倦了战斗。但我还是停不下来。谁知道在我死之前我还活了多久......不，甚至连那个都没有。小马在99年死于癌症。看着他们挣扎了几个月，这种感觉很少见，也很可怕。几个星期。天数。在疾病夺去他们的生命或者他们乞求给他们注射针头之前，他们又挣扎了一天，身体四分五裂。那就是我。我能坚持几个月直到这个污点使我残废吗？在肿瘤吞噬我的器官之前的几周？几天？
“Sanguine contacted me,” Glory said softly, not looking up from her work. “That Psychoshy brought a message while you were… getting your things in the eatery.” I said nothing, just inhaled. Her hooves, normally so sure, dropped the firing pin from the Caramel as she added quickly, “Dusk and Lightning Dancer were with me. She didn’t try anything.”
"桑吉尼联系了我,"晨辉轻声说，没有从她的工作中抬起头来。"那个神经病在你去餐馆取东西的时候带来了一条信息。"我什么也没说，只是吸了口气。她的蹄子，通常这么肯定，从焦糖掉落撞针，因为她很快补充说,"黄昏和闪电舞者与我同在。她什么都没做。"
I felt nothing. I thought nothing. I was as gray as the world beyond. “Huh,” was
我什么也感觉不到。我什么也没想。我和外面的世界一样灰暗。"哈,"是
all I could say.
我只能说。
“She told me… she told me to let you know that he could regrow my wing with Chimera.” It was amazing how she could even keep her voice; how she fought to keep the tremble of desire to a minimum.
"她告诉我......她告诉我让你知道，他可以用奇美拉重新长出我的翅膀。"令人惊奇的是，她甚至能够保持自己的声音，她是如何努力把欲望的颤抖降到最低程度。
“Mmmm…”
"嗯......"
“And… she said that he… he could clone you new organs. A new heart. Lungs. All the parts of you that are failing.”
"而且......她说他......他可以克隆你的新器官。新的心脏。肺。你所有失败的部分。"
What could I say? What should I say? I listened to the drops as they hit the window.
我能说什么呢？我该说什么？我听着水滴落在窗户上的声音。
What could she say? What would she say? She sniffed softly. “I want you to do it, Blackjack. I do…” I didn’t blink. Didn’t turn away. I stared into the reflection of my own eye. I wondered if I could see my soul.
她能说什么呢？她会说什么？她轻轻地吸了一口气。"我要你去做，黑杰克。"我愿意......"我没有眨眼。没有转身离开。我凝视着自己眼睛的反射。我想知道我是否能看到我的灵魂。
I wondered if it was tainted too.
我想知道它是否也被污染了。
“But… I know you shouldn’t accept it,” she said with another sniff as she nudged the pin into place with the tip of her hoof. She was so gentle like that. So careful. I could see her crying in my mind. Slow tears. “I know he’s a monster… that he’ll do terrible things with Chimera. That he’ll probably stab you in the back anyway before he helps you. I know it’s the wrong thing.”
"但是......我知道你不应该接受它,"她一边用蹄尖轻推别针，一边又嗅了嗅说。她那么温柔。非常小心。我可以看到她在我的脑海里哭泣。慢慢流泪。"我知道他是个怪物......他会对奇美拉做出可怕的事情。他可能会在帮你之前在背后捅你一刀。我知道这是错误的。"
But she wanted it anyway. I wanted to do it for her. I did. I wanted it so much that it hurt inside.
但她还是想要。我想为她这么做。是的。我是如此渴望它，以至于内心感到疼痛。
But we don’t always get what we want. Even when we deserve it.
但是我们并不总是能得到我们想要的。即使这是我们应得的。
I sighed softly and dropped to my knees beside her. Now it was her turn to be held. The guns forgotten, she pressed her face into my shoulder and sobbed. “I know it’s wrong but I want it so damn much!” And that was all that needed to be said. All that could be said. And like the rain in Hoofington, tears would come. But eventually the rain would end.
我轻轻地叹了口气，跪在她身边。现在轮到她被抱着了。忘记了枪声，她把脸贴在我的肩膀上抽泣起来。"我知道这是不对的，但我真的非常想要!"这就是所有需要说的。可以这么说。就像Hoofington的雨水一样，眼泪也会流下来。但是最终雨会停的。
* * *
* * *
“The Goddess would have a word,” Lacunae said from the shadows of the
"女神有话要跟你说,"拉库奈在黑暗中说
hallway. I marveled at the slide… could Glory have somehow made the action even smoother than when I’d first gotten it? “You will pay attention to us!” The Goddess stomped her hoof firmly. I used to do the same thing when I was a filly.
走廊。我惊叹于这张幻灯片......难道晨辉不知何故让这个动作比我第一次拿到它的时候更流畅了吗？"你要注意我们!"女神用力跺着她的蹄子。我小时候也做过同样的事情。
I didn’t look away from the chamber. A lot of mechanical work had gone into this weapon. I heard the soft rasp of metal on metal, barely audible after being oiled. I wondered if this had been custom built for Card Trick. Slowly, I worked the slide back and forth. That rasp was still there. “Go ahead, Your Deityness.”
我没有把目光从枪膛移开。这种武器经过了大量的机械加工。我听到金属摩擦的声音，上了油后几乎听不见。我不知道这是否是为纸牌戏法定制的。慢慢地，我前后摆弄着这张幻灯片。那锉刀还在那儿。"去吧，你的神性。"
“We command you turn over EC-1101 to this Sanguine character. We have need of Chimera. It could be the key to the future of ponykind.” I saw her scowl in Vigilance’s reflection. “You will do as the Goddess commands!”
"我们命令你把EC-1101交给这个血族人。我们需要奇美拉。这可能是马种未来的关键。"我看到她在监视器的倒影中皱着眉头。"你要听从女神的命令!"
“No,” I replied softly. There was a little bit of wear on the slide. Nothing serious.
"不,"我轻声回答。滑梯有点磨损。没什么严重的。
Goddesses, Glory did nice work with what she had.
女神，晨辉用她所拥有的东西做了很好的工作。
The Goddess stared at me with Lacunae’s face. She’d gotten rid of the dress. She looked… ordinary. Mass produced. Not the alicorn who had saved me so many times. “No?”
女神用裂隙的脸凝视着我。她把那件衣服处理掉了。她看起来...很普通。批量生产。不是那个曾经多次救过我的角斗士。"不是吗?"
“It’s two letters,” I replied as I slid a magazine home and loaded a round in the chamber.
"是两封信,"我回答道，同时把一本杂志推回家，在枪膛里装了一发子弹。
Her eyes flared in rage. “You gave your word!”
她怒目而视。"你发过誓的!"
“Yup. So it looks like I’m a liar too,” I said before looked at her. “Project Chimera came before Twilight’s alicorn project. And you have Twilight’s memories… or something… inside you. So what do you need it for?”
"是的。所以看起来我也是一个骗子,"我之前看着她说。"奇美拉计划比《暮光之城》的橡子计划早出现。你体内有暮光之城的记忆...或者其他什么东西。那你要它干什么?"
“IMPUDENT FOAL! THE GODDESS NEED NOT EXPLAIN HERSELF TO ANYPONY! WE ARE THE FUTURE OF EQUESTRIA! WE ARE YOUR SALVATION! THE GODDESS--” she began, and that was it. Before she could get past that point, Vigilance was shoved in her mouth. She looked so stunned that I might have found it funny that she’d cut off her tirade even though she had just been beaming it straight into my head.
"厚颜无耻的马驹！女神不需要向任何小马解释自己！我们是小马国的未来！我们是你的救赎！女神——"她开始说，就是这样。她还没来得及说完，警惕就被塞进了嘴里。她看起来如此震惊，以至于我可能会觉得这很有趣，以至于她停止了她的长篇大论，尽管她只是把它直接传到了我的脑子里。
“Let me make something clear. I do not like the word ‘Goddess’. I can’t even think of Celestia and Luna as Goddesses anymore. I don’t even think there are Goddesses at this point. All I know are friends and enemies. Lacunae is my friend. The Goddess isn’t.” My eye narrowed; I hoped Lacunae would forgive
"让我把话说清楚。我不喜欢女神这个词。我甚至不能再把塞勒斯蒂亚和卢娜想象成女神了。我甚至不认为在这一点上有女神。我只知道朋友和敌人。空隙是我的朋友。女神不是。"我的眼睛眯成一条缝，我希望她能原谅我
me for this. “So my suggestion would be you let Lacunae speak for you, Goddess, because right now I’m pissed off enough to ignore you out of spite.” I wanted to find a certain ghoul and make a pink, smoking wallet out of him!
我来做这个。"所以，我的建议是，女神，你应该让裂隙代表你说话，因为现在我已经够生气的了，出于怨恨而无视你。"我想找到一个食尸鬼，把他变成一个粉红色的冒烟的钱包！
For a second, I was sure that I was going to have to pull that trigger. Then I saw the slight tensing around the eyes that was more worry than indignation and pulled the gun from her mouth. “I’m sorry, Lacunae,” I said softly. I felt ashamed for doing that.
有那么一瞬间，我确信我要扣动扳机了。然后我看到她眼睛周围有点紧张，更多的是担心而不是愤怒，于是我把枪从她的嘴里拔了出来。"对不起，拉库奈,"我轻声说。我为做那件事感到羞愧。
She worked her jaw a moment before saying softly in my mind, “It’s all right, Blackjack. But as you said, the Goddess is definitely not your friend.”
她咬了一下下巴，然后在我的脑海里轻声地说:"没关系，Blackjack。但正如你所说，女神绝对不是你的朋友。"
I sighed and looked at the rain creeping down the window panes. “I don’t like beings that think they’re perfect. Powerful. Better.” I spotted my reflection in Vigilance’s polished silver plating. “I know I’m weak and powerless. I don’t need some Goddess rubbing it in.”
我叹了口气，看着雨水顺着窗玻璃往下流。"我不喜欢认为自己很完美的生物。强大。更好。"我发现我的倒影在警戒的抛光银镀层。"我知道自己软弱无力。我不需要女神来教训我。"
Lacunae was silent for a second and said, in a voice tinged with irony, “You have an odd understanding of the concept of weakness.”
空隙沉默了一会儿，用略带讽刺意味的声音说:"你对软弱的概念有一种奇怪的理解。"
I smiled slightly. How in Equestria did the Goddess believe humility, restraint, and compassion were weaknesses? If the Goddess had been like Lacunae, Equestria would be flocking in droves to join Unity. Nopony wanted to be a part of something that believed it was already better without them. “So why does she need Chimera?”
我微微一笑。在Equestria，女神是如何认为谦卑、克制和同情是软弱的呢？如果女神像裂隙一样，小马国便会成群结队地加入统一。Nopony想成为某种东西的一部分，相信没有他们会更好。"那她为什么需要奇美拉?"
“It’s a rather simple problem of biology,” she replied softly. “You see, all alicorns are biologically female.” I just blinked at her, not comprehending the problem. She elaborated delicately, “And we require males to procreate.”
"这是一个相当简单的生物学问题,"她轻声回答。"你看，所有的海牛子在生理上都是雌性的。"我只是对她视而不见，没有理解这个问题。她精妙地解释道:"我们要求男性生育。"
I blinked, furrowing my brows. “Well, I wouldn’t ask P-21 for the honors, but there’s probably a lot of males who’d take you up on that offer.”
我眨着眼睛，皱着眉头。"好吧，我不会向P-21征求这个荣誉，但可能有很多男性会接受你的邀请。"
She shook her head slowly. “We are… unfortunately… incompatible with male ponies of any variant.”
她慢慢地摇了摇头。"我们......很不幸......与任何变异的男性小马都不相容。"
Now I was frowning. “Wait a minute. If you can’t breed with pony males… then where the hell did Celestia and Luna come from?” I blurted.
现在我皱着眉头。"等一下。如果你不能和矮种马交配...那么塞莱斯蒂亚和卢娜到底是从哪里来的?"我脱口而出。
“That is a great mystery. Twilight theorized that alicorns may have been
"这是一个巨大的谜团。暮光之城理论认为，橡树果可能是
manifestations of some primal magical energy, but Celestia and Luna never confirmed this. Since the fusion megaspell originated with Chimera, though, the Goddess theorizes that perhaps it can be adapted to create a male of the species. To be honest, the Goddess is expending all her energy on various possible means of solving this dilemma. She is under a great deal of strain.”
某种原始魔法能量的表现，但塞莱斯蒂亚和卢娜从未证实这一点。然而，由于巨型融合体起源于奇美拉，女神认为也许它可以适应创造一个男性的物种。诚实地说，女神正在花费她所有的能量在各种可能的方式来解决这个困境。她承受着巨大的压力。"
I sighed softly. “I won’t give EC-1101 to Sanguine. Not to save my life… not to save your species.” Not even to replace Glory’s wing, damn me. “But if I can find some way to help you as you need to be helped, I will.” I looked up and gave her the best smile I can. “That’s the most I can promise.”
我轻轻地叹了口气。"我不会把EC-1101交给桑吉内。不是为了拯救我的生命，也不是为了拯救你们的种族。"甚至不能取代晨辉的翅膀，该死的。"但如果我能找到某种方式帮助你，正如你需要帮助一样，我会的。"我抬起头，给了她我能给的最好的微笑。"我只能保证这么多。"
She seemed to be listening for a moment. I heard the faintest of whispers as Lacunae bled over snatches of conversation. There was a mention of a book, and using ‘LittlePip’ to get it. From the little bits I gathered, she was more intelligent and less stubborn than I. The name nagged at me; where’d I heard it before? Finally, an agreement seemed to be reached as Lacunae said, “The Goddess is not happy, but she accepts your offer.”
她似乎听了一会儿。在断断续续的谈话中，我听到了最微弱的低语声。有人提到了一本书，并用《小匹普》获得了它。从我收集到的一点点资料来看，她比我更聪明，也没我那么固执。这个名字使我心烦意乱，我以前在哪里听到过？最后，似乎达成了一项协议，拉库纳说:"女神不高兴，但她接受你的提议。"
“Good, because I honestly don’t know what I’d have to do otherwise.”
"很好，因为我真的不知道如果不这样，我还能做什么。"
“Oh, that is simple. I would have teleported behind you, raised my shield, killed you with my magic, torn the PipBuck from your limb, and returned to Maripony,” she said quite matter-of-factly. “Of course, I promise you that I’d feel absolutely terrible about it afterwards.”
"哦，这很简单。我会瞬移到你身后，举起我的盾牌，用我的魔法杀死你，把皮布克从你的肢体上扯下来，然后回到Maripony。"。"当然，我向你保证，事后我会感觉非常糟糕。"
I chuckled softly. Couldn’t get much more fair than that, could I?
我轻轻地笑了。没有比这更公平的了，不是吗？
* * *
* * *
There are certain things that get my attention. Nuzzles to my flanks. The sound of a shotgun shell being actioned into the chamber. The sweet smell of Wild Pegasus. And the impact of a nearly full grown Rampage slamming into me from behind and sending me sliding down the hall. Normally I would have rolled with it to my hooves, but my braced limbs clacked as they struggled to support me and move as they were supposed to. That gave her the time to jump right on top of me.
有一些事情引起了我的注意。用鼻子蹭我的侧腹。猎枪子弹射入枪膛的声音。野生飞马的芳香。一个几乎完全成熟的暴怒冲击着我的身后，让我滑下了大厅。正常情况下，我会把它滚到我的蹄子上，但我支撑着的四肢发出咯咯的响声，因为他们挣扎着支撑我，并且像他们应该做的那样移动。这样她就有时间跳到我身上。
“Hi. I wanted you to know that Scotch is done. She doesn’t remember anything from the tunnels. Not a thing,” she hissed down at my face. “Do you know what she did? The very first thing?”
"嗨。我想让你知道苏格兰威士忌已经喝完了。她不记得隧道里发生的任何事。什么都没有,"她朝我的脸嘶嘶地说。"你知道她做了什么吗？第一件事?"
“Rampage, I’ve had a lot of people jumping on me today…” I really hoped I wouldn’t have to shoot her in the head again.
"横冲直撞，今天有很多人跳到我身上......"我真希望我不会再朝她的头部开枪了。
“She asked for me!” she shouted in my face. “Don’t you get it? She’s young and scared and afraid and asked for me to see her.” I saw the tears beneath the rage. “Just like Thorn! Just like…” She grimaced and sobbed, pressing her face to my chest. “I had to tell her no. I ran from her. She needed me and I ran!”
"她要找我!"她当着我的面大喊大叫。"你还不明白吗？她很年轻，很害怕，很害怕，要我去见她。"我看到了愤怒下的泪水。"就像索恩一样！就像......"她做了个鬼脸，抽泣着，脸紧贴着我的胸膛。"我不得不拒绝她。我从她身边跑开。她需要我，我就跑了!"
Because otherwise she might kill Scotch Tape. “Rampage… I’m sorry.”
否则她可能会杀了透明胶带。"横冲直撞......对不起。"
My striped friend rubbed her nose. “Why’d you have to do it, Blackjack? Scotch is a tough girl. So she had a scare or two… she’d get tougher from them. But now she’s scared and all she knows is I can’t be around her. And I can’t tell her… not the reason why she doesn’t remember or why I can’t give her the hug she needs.”
我那有条纹的朋友揉了揉鼻子。"你为什么要这么做，黑杰克？苏格兰人是个坚强的女孩。所以她受了一两次惊吓......她会变得更加坚强。但是现在她害怕了，她只知道我不能在她身边。我不能告诉她......不能告诉她为什么她不记得，也不能告诉她为什么我不能给她她需要的拥抱。"
I sat up. “Who’s with Scotch now?”
我坐了起来。"现在谁要苏格兰威士忌?"
“Glory and the Zodiac filly Virgo. I think she’s the first friend that Scotch Tape’s had.”
"晨辉与黄道十二宫处女座。我想她是苏格兰胶带的第一个朋友。"
I gave a little smile. “Maybe she should stay here, then, instead of going to Chapel.” She certainly wasn’t -- and then Rampage’s hoof across my face ended that thought process.
我微微一笑。"那么，也许她应该留在这里，而不是去教堂。"她当然不是----然后狂暴的蹄子踩过我的脸，结束了我的思考过程。
“Don’t you get it?” Rampage shouted in my face. “She doesn’t want to go back to Chapel anymore. She wants to stay with us! So if we send her away, it’ll seem like we’re all abandoning her. It’ll break her heart even more!” To my shock, she started to laugh. “It’s funny, when you think about it. Like me catching the killer only to become a killer myself.” There wasn’t any mirth in that laugh. Only a ragged madness that grew sharper and sharper. She slammed me harder and harder into the tiles. “I killed her! I killed her!”
"你还不明白吗?"狂暴对着我的脸喊道。"她再也不想回教堂了。她想和我们在一起！所以如果我们把她送走，就好像我们都抛弃了她。这会让她更伤心的!"令我震惊的是，她开始大笑起来。"想想就觉得很有趣。就像我抓住了凶手，结果自己也变成了凶手。"笑声中没有一丝笑意。只有破烂的疯狂变得越来越尖锐。她把我摔得越来越重，摔在瓷砖上。"我杀了她！我杀了她!"
There was something very wrong when you needed a bullet in the head to calm somepony down.
当你需要一颗子弹来让某个小马安静下来的时候，有一些事情是非常错误的。
As she regenerated, I made sure to get out from under her and on my legs. Two Collegiate ponies came around the corner and spotted the crimson spray on the wall and the sight of her head pulling itself together. From the way they ran off, I supposed that Scotch wasn’t the only pony needing their memory modified.
当她再生的时候，我确保从她的下面爬出来，用我的腿。两匹学院派的小马从拐角处过来，看到墙上的深红色浪花，看到她的头在一起。从他们逃跑的方式来看，我猜想苏格兰人不是唯一需要修改记忆的小马。
Of course, being shot in the head didn’t solve anything.
当然，头部中枪并不能解决任何问题。
“Rampage… I’m sorry. I did what I thought was right. Maybe I’m wrong, but if I can give Scotch Tape some peace, I will. She’ll be upset for a while… but then she’ll get better. And we’ll get her someplace safe and happy as soon as we can. Okay?” Was I trying to convince myself or her?
"横冲直撞......对不起。我做了我认为正确的事。也许我错了，但如果我能让透明胶带平静下来，我会的。她会难过一段时间...但之后她会好起来的。我们会尽快把她送到安全快乐的地方。好吗?"我是在试图说服自己还是她？
“I don’t want another Thorn,” she said softly as she turned away. “I can’t take another Thorn.” And then she quietly walked back down the hall, leaving patters of blood in her wake.
"我不想要另一个荆棘,"她转过身轻轻地说。"我再也受不了荆棘了。"然后她静静地走回大厅，在她身后留下一片片血迹。
* * *
* * *
It was getting late. After my little display in the meal room, the Collegiate had found a place for us on the second floor over the old gymnasium. The classrooms were full of junk and stank of musty carpeting and dust, but they were dry and private. We’d lit a fire, and the orange and yellow flames danced and flickered across the faces of my friends. The rain had picked up again and was washing the fog away. It sounded as if it was trying to scour the entire city away. A flash and boom made the windows rattle, and Scotch Tape jumped for cover underneath some blankets. I couldn’t blame her. Every flash made my hoof jerk in response.
时间不早了。经过我在餐厅里的小小展示，学院派在二楼旧体育馆的上面为我们找到了一个地方。教室里到处都是垃圾和发霉的地毯和灰尘，但它们干燥而私密。我们点燃了一堆火，橙色和黄色的火焰在我朋友的脸上跳舞和闪烁。雨又加大了，把雾冲走了。听起来好像是要把整个城市搜个底朝天。闪光和隆隆声使得窗户格格作响，透明胶带在毯子下面跳了起来。我不能责怪她。每一次闪光都使我的蹄子抽搐起来。
Scotch looked confused; she had since she rejoined us. Her eyes were big and round and afraid, not of what she’d experienced but of what she’d lost. We’d fed her lies: she’d been injured in the tunnels and knocked out. She’d swallowed them and now they were sour and heavy in her stomach. But she didn’t complain because she didn’t know any better. Children should listen to their parents. What should parents listen to?
苏格兰人看上去很困惑，自从她回到我们中间以来，她就一直困惑着。她的眼睛又大又圆，很害怕，不是因为她经历了什么，而是因为她失去了什么。我们骗了她:她在隧道里受伤了，昏迷了。她把它们吞了下去，现在它们又酸又沉，在她的胃里。但是她没有抱怨，因为她不知道还有什么更好的。孩子们应该听父母的话。父母应该听什么？
“I need to decide what to do,” I said softly, my eye turning from one to the next. Scotch hadn’t been the only pony to lose. Not even the first. Ever since my alarm went off for that last shift in the stable, I’d been losing. So had everypony with me. So had everypony in this damned city. Hoofington was a maw that--no, not all at once. No, that would have been decent. That would have been respectable. Hoofington was a leech sucking everything away as slowly as possible.
"我需要决定做什么,"我轻声说，眼睛从一个转向另一个。苏格兰人并不是唯一一个失败的小马。即使是第一次也不行。自从上次在马厩换班时闹钟响了以后，我一直在输钱。所有的小马都跟着我。这个该死的城市里的每一匹小马也是如此。胡芬顿是一个无底洞----不，不是一下子。不，那样就好了。那样就太体面了。胡芬顿是一只水蛭，尽可能地慢慢地吸走一切。
Right now, I hated this city. I hated it with every bit of my being. I stood up to address the others. “As some of you realize, I’m not doing too well at this rate. Triage gave me six months before taint eats me up. Even if I say ‘fuck that’ and
现在，我恨这座城市。我对此恨之入骨。我站起来向其他人讲话。"正如你们中的一些人意识到的那样，以这样的速度，我做得不太好。在这个污点吞噬我之前，我还有六个月的时间。即使我说'去他妈的'
live twice as long… I’m still dead in a year. Professor Zodiac’s told me to leave Hoofington… and that all of you should too. Go somewhere else. Help the Stable Dweller… something.” I closed my eye, taking a deep breath. “But I’m not going to.”
活两倍的时间...一年后我还是会死。十二宫教授叫我离开胡芬顿，你们也应该离开。去别的地方。帮助马厩里的居民......做点什么。"我闭上眼睛，深吸了一口气。"但我不会这么做。"
P-21 was almost completely turned away from me. Only the thinnest sliver of his face showed in the flickering light as his forehooves incessantly rubbed his rear leg. He stared off; was he looking into Stable 99 right now? Was he hearing the Overmare? He was a smart pony… but not a good one. The chance to be a good pony had been taken from him. Now he was just trying to not be a bad one. Priest would never love a bad pony.
P-21几乎完全不理我。他的前蹄不停地摩擦着他的后腿，在闪烁的灯光下，只露出他脸上最薄的一片。他目瞪口呆，他现在是在看《稳定99》吗？他是不是听到了乌弗马的声音？他是一匹聪明的小马...但不是一匹好马。他失去了当一匹好小马的机会。现在他只是不想成为一个坏人。牧师永远不会喜欢一匹坏小马。
“It’s also been suggested that I give EC-1101 to Professor Zodiac. Hand it over and let her deal with it. And I’m mighty tempted to do that,” I said softly. “She seems a decent sort… if a little weird. But I’m not going to do that. Like it or not, this is something I have to see through.” I looked at Lacunae in the corner, feeling the stare of hundreds of eyes reflecting the flame. “It’s also been suggested that I give EC-1101 to Sanguine. Get myself some new organs, Glory a new wing, and the Goddess a date.
"还有人建议我把EC-1101交给黄道带教授。交给她，让她自己处理。我很想这么做,"我轻声说。"她看起来是个不错的人......虽然有点怪。但我不会那么做。不管你喜欢与否，这是我必须看穿的东西。"我看着角落里的空隙，感觉到数百只眼睛凝视着火焰。"还有人建议我把EC-1101交给桑吉尼。给自己弄些新的器官，晨辉一个新的翅膀，和女神一个日期。
“Well I’m not going to do that either. After what he’s done, Sanguine’s never going to get his hooves on Chimera if I can help it. Maybe we can get that project to Professor Zodiac or something and explore that possibility later. But not through Sanguine. Not after 99 and Deus.” I looked at the dark alicorn, wondering if I was addressing my friend or my enemy.
"好吧，我也不会那么做。在他做了那些事之后，如果我能帮忙的话，桑吉纳永远也不会对奇美拉动手脚。也许我们可以把这个项目交给十二宫教授或者其他什么人，然后再探索这种可能性。但不是通过桑吉尼。在99和Deus之后就不是了。"我看着黑暗的角果，不知道我是在对我的朋友还是敌人说话。
“What about Steelpony?” Glory asked. “Maybe the professor could do… something?”
"那Steelpony呢?"晨辉问道。"也许教授可以......做点什么?"
I shook my head. “It’s not like there’s a great overabundance of bionic parts out there. She’d have to make the synthetic organs from scratch. There’s not enough time for that to save me. Sorry.” Glory hung her head and nodded silently.
我摇了摇头。"仿生部件并不多。她必须从头开始制造合成器官。没有足够的时间来拯救我。对不起。"晨辉低下了头，默默地点了点头。
The fire flickered and danced across Rampage’s face, every lick of flame from the barrel seeming to make her change. Was she a foal-murdering psychopath? Perhaps an ardent defender of law? A zebra traitor? Someone else? She’d be back to full strength in the morning, but what would she do?
火焰在狂暴的脸上闪烁跳动，桶上的每一滴火焰似乎都在使她改变。她是杀小马驹的变态杀人狂吗？也许是一个热心的法律捍卫者？一个斑马叛徒？还有别人吗？她早上就会恢复到最佳状态，但是她会怎么做呢？
What would I do?
我该怎么办？
Glory looked at me. She’d follow me to the end. I didn’t want her to. She deserved her own life. Her own happiness. I’d reunited her with her sister, at least. Who knew what else was possible?
晨辉看着我。她会跟着我走到最后。我不想让她知道。她值得拥有自己的生活。她自己的幸福。我至少让她和她姐姐团聚了。谁知道还有什么是可能的？
“Goldenblood did something before the end of the war. I’m sure of it. He did something… and I suspect it was something big and something bad. EC-1101 is at the heart of it. If I have a short time left, I’m going to do what I can to find out what. And I’m going to do whatever I can to stop the fighting. We’re going north, and I’m going to tell the Steel Rangers we were behind that attack and see what we can do to end their war with the Reapers.”
"金血王在战争结束前做了一些事情。我很确定。他做了一些事情...我怀疑是一些大的和坏的事情。Ec-1101是它的核心。如果我只剩下很短的时间，我会尽我所能去寻找答案。我会尽我所能阻止这场战争。我们要向北前进，我要告诉钢铁突击队我们是那次攻击的幕后黑手，看看我们能做些什么来结束他们和死神的战争。"
Rampage snorted softly. “You’ll be going into a meat grinder, Blackjack. That’s Flash Fillies territory. They like Psychoshy and don’t like you.”
狂暴轻轻地哼了一声。"你将会进入绞肉机，Blackjack。那是闪电小雌马的地盘。他们喜欢心理害羞，不喜欢你。"
“We could circle around to the east. Towards Black Pony Mountain,” Glory suggested.
"我们可以绕到东边去。走向黑马驹山,"晨辉建议道。
“That’s right by Paradise. Red Eye’s there,” Rampage countered.
"就在天堂旁边。红眼就在那儿,"狂暴反驳道。
“Well… go past Red Eye and along the eastern mountains.”
"嗯......穿过红眼然后沿着东部山脉走。"
“Even worse idea. Ever hear of an Ursa Major?” From the gasp from Lacunae, one of us had. Rampage didn’t elaborate. “Let’s just that say there’s a reason everypony stays away from Black Pony Mountain.”
"更糟糕的主意。听说过大熊座吗?"从Lacunae发出的喘息声中，我们中的一个人。狂暴没有详细说明。"这么说吧，每匹小马都远离黑马山是有原因的。"
“It doesn’t matter. If the Flash Fillies want to fight me, they’re going to fight me. But somepony’s got to talk to the Steel Rangers and get this stopped before one side wipes out the other.”
"没关系。如果闪电小姑娘们想跟我打架，他们会跟我打的。但总得有人和钢铁骑兵谈谈，在一方消灭另一方之前阻止这一切。"
“Wouldn’t it be better if they did?” P-21 said quietly, staring off into space. “You’ve pretty much said you won’t back the Reapers. If they’re so determined to kill each other… let them.”
"他们这么做不是更好吗?"P-21静静地说着，眼睛盯着太空。"你差不多已经说过你不会支持收割者。如果他们下定决心要自相残杀......那就让他们去吧。"
“Nothing’s going to get better if we do that! So the Reapers kill off the Rangers or the Rangers kill off the Reapers. That’ll just lead to another round and another round. Eventually, there won’t be anything left!” I said, with a stomp of my hoof, the brace clattering with the motion. I looked at Rampage. The poison spreads a little more year after year. I looked to each of my friends. “If we’re going to matter at all, then we’re going to have to do better. All of us. Not just we six, but everypony. And if I’m only here for a short while, then I’m going to
"如果我们这样做，一切都不会变得更好！所以收割者杀死了突击队或突击队杀死了收割者。这只会导致又一轮又一轮的比赛。最终，什么都不会剩下!"我跺了跺蹄子说，支架随着移动发出咔嗒咔嗒的声音。我看着狂暴。毒药年复一年地扩散。我看着我的每一个朋友。"如果我们要发挥作用，那么我们就必须做得更好。我们所有人。不只是我们六个，而是每个人。如果我只在这里待一小会儿，那么我就会
do my damnedest to encourage folks to do better.
尽我最大的努力鼓励人们做得更好。
“Or die trying…” I finished grimly. The Dealer stared at me from the far side of the burning barrel, his lip curling in a small smile.
"或者为此而死......"我冷酷地说完。"商人"从燃烧着的大桶的另一边盯着我，嘴唇上翘着一丝微笑。
And that was that. Decision cast. I would stay in Hoofington and chase down Goldenblood’s secret projects and learn what that bastard had done with the O.I.A. Because I suspected that, apocalypse and two centuries notwithstanding, it wasn't dead yet. Just sleeping, and I wasn't sure I wanted to know what would happen if it woke up.
就是这样。决策投票。我会留在Hoofington，追查《金血王》的秘密项目，了解那个混蛋对战俘信息组织做了什么因为我怀疑，尽管世界末日和两个世纪，它还没有死。只是在睡觉，我不确定我是否想知道如果它醒来会发生什么。
Twilight Sparkle had created Gardens to save Equestria. Goldenblood wanted to save Equestria more than anything.
紫悦创建了花园来拯救小马国。金血王最想救的就是小马国。
With all the resources of the six ministries, what could Goldenblood have created?
凭借六个部的所有资源，金血王能创造出什么呢？
* * *
* * *
“Do I love Blackjack? That’s… an oddly personal question. I’m not sure how to answer. ‘Yes’ would suffice, but it really wouldn’t explain much, would it? I suppose what you’re really asking is: why do I love Blackjack?
"我喜欢黑杰克吗？这是...一个奇怪的私人问题。我不知道该怎么回答。'是的'就足够了，但这真的解释不了什么，不是吗？我想你真正想问的是:为什么我喜欢黑杰克？
“When Blackjack is at her best, she’s like ponykind at its best. I really believe there’s nothing she can’t accomplish when she’s like that. It’s almost scary just what she can get done when she puts her mind to it. She tracked down Dusk, fought a whole slew of Red Eye’s soldiers, and brought her back to help me. And it worked. I don’t think Dusk and I have ever talked like we did when she saw my injury. And that’s why, when she talks about saving Hoofington and Equestria, I think she might be able to do it.
"当黑杰克处于最佳状态时，她就像一匹最好的马驹。我真的相信当她那样的时候，没有什么是她不能完成的。当她下定决心的时候，她所能做的事情几乎是可怕的。她找到了黄昏，和一大群红眼的士兵战斗，把她带回来帮助我。结果奏效了。我认为黄昏和我从来没有像她看到我受伤时那样说过话。这就是为什么，当她谈到拯救胡芬顿和Equestria时，我认为她也许能够做到。
“At the same time, I’m scared of her. I’m scared of what she’ll do; what she can do. She killed her stable because she thought it was the right thing to do. She almost killed herself for the same reason. I don’t know what snapped her out of that, but it had to be miraculous. She went through those tunnels and she kept going when we all just wanted to die. And so I’m scared that one day she’s going to go somewhere… and I won’t be able to follow her.
"同时，我也很怕她。我害怕她会做什么，她能做什么。她杀了她的马厩，因为她认为这样做是对的。她也因为同样的原因差点自杀。我不知道是什么让她从那种情绪中清醒过来，但这一定是个奇迹。她穿过那些隧道，当我们都想死的时候，她继续前进。所以我害怕有一天她会去某个地方......而我却不能跟着她。
“So, do I love her? Yes. But will I always be able to be there for her? I don’t know…”
"那么，我爱她吗？是的。但是我能一直陪在她身边吗？我不知道......"
* * *
* * *
There wasn’t much discussion after that. My friends knew my plan. Would they leave me? It would probably be for the best. Rampage had no reason to stay and every reason to go. P-21… there was a better life waiting for him in Chapel.
在那之后就没有什么讨论了。我的朋友们知道我的计划。他们会离开我吗？这可能是最好的结果。狂暴没有理由留下来，也没有理由离开。P-21...在小教堂里有一个更好的生活在等着他。
Lacunae… how could I know that the Goddess wouldn’t just sweep her aside and take over? Scotch should be left behind; where I was going was no place for a filly. And, though I loved her more than my own life, it wasn’t a place for Glory, either. I was destined for a bad end.
空隙......我怎么知道女神不会把她扫到一边然后接管呢？苏格兰威士忌应该留下来，我要去的地方可不是小母马待的地方。而且，尽管我爱她胜过我自己的生命，但这也不是一个晨辉的地方。我注定要走向一个不幸的结局。
I still didn’t want to be alone again… I hated being alone. But I hated my friends being hurt by me even more.
我还是不想再一个人...我讨厌一个人。但是我更讨厌我的朋友被我伤害。
I rested my head on Glory’s chest, listening to the beat of a sound and healthy heart, and let it soothe me off to sleep.
我把头靠在晨辉的胸膛上，听着健康的心跳声，让它安抚我入睡。
~ ~ ~
~ ~ ~
My hooves crunched softly beneath the snow, the night turned to amber hues as I trotted along with my PipBuck clicking in my ears. For some reason, I was dressed all in black. Black gas mask. Black barding that completely covered me horn to hoof. Black coat covering it all. The heaps of snow seemed to glow on their own as I trudged silently along the road.
我的蹄子在雪下轻轻地嘎吱作响，夜晚变成了琥珀色，我一路小跑，我的皮布克在耳朵里嘎吱作响。出于某种原因，我穿了一身黑衣服。黑色防毒面具。黑色的铠甲完全遮住了我的角和蹄。黑色外套覆盖了一切。当我静静地在路上跋涉时，雪堆似乎自己发出了光芒。
Above me hung a city of dreams, or maybe nightmares, on a grand and terrible platform clinging to the side of a cliff. My lips moved silently, but the familiar words were dull and meaningless. Streamers of gas seemed to trickle off the edges of the city. The rancid taste of orange filled my mouth from a tube at the corner. There were other tracks in the snow. Bodies in the snow. A trail of dead ponies. I walked on them whenever I could to get out of the snow. The dark clouds overhead continued to dump layer after layer of the fluffy material. It was knee deep now.
在我的上方，悬挂着一座充满梦想，或者也许是噩梦的城市，它矗立在悬崖边一个宏伟而可怕的平台上。我的嘴唇静静地动着，但是那些熟悉的词语却是枯燥而无意义的。一股股的汽油似乎从城市的边缘慢慢地流下来。我从角落里的一根管子里，尝到了橘子腐臭的味道。雪地上还有其他的痕迹。雪地里的尸体。一串死去的小马。只要能走出雪地，我就踩着它们走。头顶上的乌云不断地倾倒着一层又一层蓬松的物质。现在已经没膝深了。
There were lights ahead. Skywagons. Tents. Ponies milling about, crying softly as they huddled in the shelter of the vehicles. I moved off the road, as silent as the snow around me, creeping closer.
前面有灯光。空中旅行车。帐篷。小马们在车辆的掩护下挤作一团，轻轻地哭泣。我离开了马路，像周围的雪一样安静，慢慢靠近。
“Get another case of Rad-X opened and keep them out of this green snow,” a mare wearing bright yellow barding called out. “Get those emergency suits handed out. Foals first, damn it!” she yelled as she waved her hoof at the ponies
"再打开一箱Rad-X，别让它们进入这片绿色的雪地,"一匹穿着亮黄色外套的母马叫道。"把那些紧急服分发出去。马驹先来，该死的!"她一边对着小马挥着蹄子，一边大叫
around her. The suits were marked with the Ministry of Peace’s butterflies. There were soldiers, too, looking scared as they stared out at the night.
在她身边。这些衣服上印有和平部的蝴蝶标志。也有士兵，看起来很害怕，因为他们凝视着夜晚。
I crept closer. A soldier said to the mare in the yellow emergency suit, “Is it true? Is Hoofington gone too?”
我蹑手蹑脚地走近。一个士兵对穿着黄色紧急服装的母马说:"是真的吗？胡芬顿也走了吗?"
“There’s no reply on any of the emergency channels,” the mare replied. “We might be able to make it to the Fluttershy Medical Center… if it hasn’t been hit…” There was a note of despair on the edge of her voice as she looked out at the darkness. “…is there any place that hasn’t been hit?”
"任何紧急频道都没有回应,"母马回答。"我们也许能够到达Fluttershy医疗中心......如果它没有被击中的话......"当她望向外面的黑暗时，她的声音边缘带有绝望的语调。"...还有什么地方没被袭击过吗?"
“Long as we hit them too,” the soldier muttered softly as she scowled up at the dead city. “I don’t think anypony else is coming out of there. We can’t keep this evacuation center here forever.” She stamped her hoof in the snow. “I can’t believe that the Steel Rangers just abandoned us. ‘Recalled’ my ass. What were they recalled for?”
"只要我们也打中他们,"士兵低声咕哝着，皱起眉头望着这座死城。"我不认为还会有其他人从那里出来。我们不能永远把这个疏散中心留在这里。"她在雪地上跺蹄子。"我不敢相信钢铁骑兵队就这样抛弃了我们。回忆个屁。他们为什么被召回?"
Then I floated a rifle out in front of me. The leg-long scope made the soldier’s head leap clearly into view. Matronly. Definitely a motherly type. Not the sort you’d expect to find in combat barding. Crosshairs aligned on the side of her head. A small hole appeared just behind her temple; her body blocked most of the sight of the blood spray in the snow. The mare in the emergency suit froze, but the glassy helmet distorted my targeting. A second later, the rifle fired silently into her. Chest shot. She dropped and started to crawl towards one of the wagons.
然后我把一支步枪举到我面前。长腿望远镜使士兵的头部清晰地跃入眼帘。苦参。绝对是个母亲型的。不是你想象中在战斗中能找到的那种。十字瞄准器对准她的头部一侧。她的太阳穴后面出现了一个小洞，她的身体挡住了大部分看到雪地上血花的视线。穿紧急服的母马僵住了，但玻璃般的头盔扭曲了我的瞄准目标。一秒钟后，步枪静静地朝她开了一枪。胸部射击。她倒在地上，开始向一辆马车爬去。
The other soldiers in the evacuation camp began to scramble. “Sniper! Zebra sniper!” they called out as the refugees started to scream.
疏散营地里的其他士兵开始爬起来。"狙击手！斑马狙击手!"当难民们开始尖叫的时候，他们开始喊叫。
Crosshairs swept the camp. Soldier with a rifle. Headshot. Soldier with a rifle. Headshot. The others were behind cover. Taking another sip of rancid orange, I rose and moved towards the camp. The rifle disassembled itself in the air above me, returning to my bags, and out came two matte black submachineguns: IF-44 ‘Angel Bunny’s. A hoof-long silencer was screwed to each as I moved like black death upon the camp, the cylinders muffling the noise and cutting down the muzzle flash.
十字准星扫过营地。拿着步枪的士兵。大头照。拿着步枪的士兵。大头照。其他人都躲在掩体后面。我又喝了一口发臭的橙汁，站起身朝营地走去。步枪在我头顶的空中自己解体了，回到我的包里，出来了两支哑光黑色冲锋枪:IF-44'天使兔'。当我像黑死病一样在营地上移动时，每个人都拧上了一个马蹄式消音器，汽缸消除了噪音，减少了枪口的闪光。
Soldiers came out of cover, trying to protect ponies in a dying world. The Angel Bunnies thumped silently as three-round bursts of ten millimeter ammo cut them down. My black barding protected me better than their combat armor as I
士兵们从掩体中走出来，试图在一个濒临死亡的世界里保护小马。天使兔子们静静地重击着，三发子弹射出的10毫米子弹把它们击倒了。我的黑袍比他们的战斗盔甲更能保护我，就像我一样
systematically eliminated all opposition in the camp.
系统地消灭了营地里的所有反对派。
A little more death in Equestria.
在Equestria又多了一个死亡。
No more bullets being fired. I headed to the medical crates and began to resupply. Rad-X and RadAway first. Healing potions next. Bullets from the fallen soldiers, even if I didn’t have weapons that could use them; I wasn’t going to leave anything that could shoot me in the back. Food and purified water last, as much as I could carry. There wasn’t much left after that.
没有子弹了。我走向医疗箱，开始补给。首先是Rad-X和RadAway。接下来是治疗药剂。来自阵亡士兵的子弹，即使我没有可以使用它们的武器;我不会留下任何可以从背后向我开枪的东西。食物和纯净水最后，尽可能多的我可以携带。之后就没剩下什么了。
“Please. There are children here,” the mare in the Ministry of Peace emergency suit gasped. “You’re killing children…” she begged as she hugged my back hoof. “Please… enough ponies have died…”
"求你了。"这里有孩子,"母马在和平部紧急服喘息。"你在杀害孩子......"她抱着我的后蹄恳求道。"拜托......死的小马已经够多了......"
For a moment, I looked down at her, then drew a pistol from the mare who had died first while wanting to protect the evacuation camp. I checked the soldier’s pistol and walked to the fallen skywagons. “No. Please, no!” she shouted behind me, stretching her hoof after me.
有那么一会儿，我低头看着她，然后从那头为了保护疏散营地而先死去的母马身上拔出了手枪。我检查了士兵的手枪，走向坠落的空中马车。"没有。求你了，不要!"她在我身后喊道，伸着蹄子跟在我后面。
Killing foals was no different than killing their mothers. They screamed, bled, and died like animals. One round in each head to make sure. Nine millimeter rounds were trash anyway. In less than five minutes, the soldier’s pistol was tossed into the snow. “Why…?” the medical mare gasped as she crawled towards me. Not that she could understand. They were all dead. All of them. Of radiation. Poison. Lead poisoning. Time. I was simply saving them the pain. She gets to live. Maybe. Maybe she’ll figure it out. Maybe not.
杀死小马驹和杀死它们的母亲没什么两样。他们尖叫，流血，像动物一样死去。每人头上各开一枪。反正9毫米口径的子弹也是垃圾。不到五分钟，士兵的手枪就被扔进了雪地里。"为什么......"那个医务母马向我爬过来时，倒抽了一口冷气。虽然她听不懂。他们都死了。所有人。辐射。毒药。铅中毒。时间。我只是为了让他们免受痛苦。她可以活下去。也许吧。也许她会想明白的。也许不是。
I continued on the road east. No answer. Not a word. No forgiveness any more. No absolution. Only the mission. The snow consumed all her wails and cries. She should be thankful; she had enough supplies remaining to maybe last a few months. Me? I had a pony to kill.
我继续向东走。没有回答。一句话也没说。不再宽恕。没有赦免。只有任务。雪花吞噬了她所有的哀号和哭泣。她应该心存感激，因为她还有足够的食物可以维持几个月。我？我有一匹小马要宰。
~ ~ ~
~ ~ ~
I raised my head, looking at the amber hues of the room and my sleeping friends. Scotch had scooted up under Glory’s wing. P-21 was a dark blob in one corner, Rampage another in the opposite corner. Lacunae stood as still as stone by the cold fire barrel. I stared into the darkness and whispered, “What the hay...?”
我抬起头，看着房间里琥珀色的色调和熟睡的朋友们。苏格兰人在晨辉的羽翼下迅速逃窜。P-21在一个角落里是一团黑影，在另一个角落里是暴怒。空隙静静地站在冰冷的火桶旁。我盯着黑暗低声说,"这是什么干草......?"
* * *
* * *
I paced back and forth in front of the projector. “And then I just left her there. Like I was trying to teach her a lesson! And I just trotted off with all those stolen supplies! Like… where the hell did a dream like that come from?” I asked, trying to ignore robots peeling away withered flesh from some blasted bionic parts against the far wall.
我在放映机前来回踱步。"然后我就把她留在那儿了。好像我在给她上一课似的！然后我就带着那些偷来的补给跑掉了！比如...这样的梦到底是从哪里来的?"我问道，尽量不去理会那些靠在远处墙上的机器人，它们正在剥离一些被炸毁的仿生部件上枯萎的肉。
The flickering projection just shrugged. “If you asked me the strength to mass ratio of enchanted silver or the velocity of a southbound pegasus carrying a coconut, I could tell you. I’m an engineer, not a psychologist.” She cocked her head. “What do you normally dream about?”
闪烁的投影只是耸耸肩。"如果你问我魔银的强度与质量的比例，或者一匹南下的飞马带着一个椰子的速度，我可以告诉你。我是工程师，不是心理学家。"她歪着头。"你通常梦见什么?"
I sighed, looking in a box marked ‘medical supplies’: Med-X, Rad-X, Buck, Steady, Dash inhalers... well, Dash had kept me alive long enough to get to Scalpel. “Gassing Stable 99… usually. Sometimes I get other freaky dreams. Blowing up Deus.” One filly torn in half... One crushed in an embrace... A lullaby... “That thing in the tunnels... me and sleep aren’t real friendly.” I held up a few needles of Med-X and boxes of Rad-X tablets with a little smile, and the projection sighed and nodded. Score!
我叹了口气，看着一个标着"医疗用品"的箱子:Med-X，Rad-X，Buck，Steady，Dash吸入器...好吧，Dash让我活了足够长的时间去拿手术刀。"气体稳定性99...通常。有时我会做一些奇怪的梦。炸死天王。"一只小母马被撕成两半......一只被拥抱压碎......催眠曲......"隧道里的那个东西......我和睡眠不是真正的友好。"我微笑着拿起几针Med-X和几盒Rad-X药片，放映机叹了口气，点了点头。得分！
Once I’d refilled my stock of chems, I sat on one of the cushions. Fortunately, one side effect of being a cyberpony: you really didn’t need that much shuteye. “So, the theme was right up there… but everything in it was out of left field. I mean, it felt almost like a memory orb, but far more real and familiar. Like… it was me remembering them, not just watching the experiences of others.”
一旦我再次装满了药品，我就坐在一个靠垫上。幸运的是，作为一匹赛博马的一个副作用是:你真的不需要那么多的睡眠。"所以，主题就在那里......但里面的一切都超出了我的想象。我的意思是，它几乎像一个记忆球，但更真实和熟悉得多。就像......是我在回忆他们，而不仅仅是看着别人的经历。"
“Well to be honest, I can’t imagine. If it wasn’t an internal dream, then it must have been external. You’ve been exposed to unprecedented levels of taint and Enervation. It’s caused microtumors in your brain that are thus far fairly benign but could possibly be affecting your mental processes. Your friend Glory helped us determine their growth rate.” ‘Cause Glory was just awesome like that. And me having brain tumors sure would have explained a lot back in 99.
"老实说，我无法想象。如果这不是一个内在的梦想，那么一定是外在的。你们已经暴露在前所未有的污染和衰弱中。它在你的大脑中造成了微型肿瘤，到目前为止是相当良性的，但可能会影响你的心理过程。你的朋友晨辉帮助我们确定了他们的增长率。"因为光荣就是那样棒极了。我得了脑瘤在99年肯定能解释很多问题。
I sighed and shook my head. “Can I ask you something? Triage mentioned you went down the elevator too. Why?”
我叹了口气，摇了摇头。""我可以问你一件事吗？分诊医生说你也坐电梯下去了。为什么?"
She sighed. “Well, you know that I was predominantly involved with Steelpony, but I heard rumors about the other projects. It was a bit of a game back then to try and find out each other’s secrets. The only pony who knew everything was Goldenblood… and maybe Vanity.”
她叹了口气。"嗯，你知道我主要参与了Steelpony项目，但我听到了关于其他项目的传言。在当时，试图发现彼此的秘密有点像游戏。唯一知道一切的小马是金色血统......或许还有虚荣。"
“Vanity? His uncle?”
"虚荣？他的叔叔?"
She nodded slowly. “He was always accompanying Goldenblood. Technically, he worked for the M.o.M. keeping an eye on bad ponies in the military, but after the Marauders disbanded he was brought into the O.I.A. directly.” She frowned. “Some ponies think that he was really spying for Pinkie Pie. That he turned over something that made Luna dismiss him from his position, because he worked with Horse and Trueblood. But if he really was against his nephew, Vanity could have done a lot more damage to him. So it’s a mystery.”
她慢慢地点了点头。"他总是陪着金血王。从技术上讲，他为战略行动组织工作，负责监视军队中的劣等小马，但在劫掠者解散后，他直接被带到战略行动组。"她皱起了眉头。"有些小马认为他实际上是在为平奇·派当间谍。他交出了一些让卢娜解雇他的东西，因为他和马和特鲁布拉德一起工作。但是如果他真的反对他的侄子，虚荣心可能会对他造成更大的伤害。所以这是一个谜。"
The projection then smiled. “I’d heard about those ruins and the memories. Rarity and Goldenblood had been down there. I was hoping to catch a memory of either of them, especially Goldenblood. Unfortunately, I was down there so long that… well…” She pointed a glowing hoof at the jar.
然后投影笑了。"我听说过那些废墟和回忆。奥瑞尔和金色血统曾经在那里。我希望能记起他们中的任何一个，尤其是金血王。不幸的是，我在下面呆的时间太长了......好吧......"她用一个发光的蹄子指了指罐子。
“And did you find out anything?” I asked eagerly.
"你有什么发现吗?"我急切地问道。
“I did encounter one memory... but… let me see if I can do this…” The room lights began to flicker, then darkened as the projector lit up the space overhead. The colors combined and oriented themselves into that dreary buried ruin. There were no swirling motes of light. Just magic lamps illuminating the crushed stone.
"我确实遇到了一个记忆......但是......让我看看我能不能做到这一点......"房间里的灯开始闪烁，然后随着投影仪照亮了头顶上的空间而变暗。各种颜色混合在一起，形成了那个阴沉的被埋葬的废墟。没有旋转的光晕。只是照亮碎石的魔法灯。
It was back in the ruins, and there were two mares, not counting my host, collecting pot shards. It became apparent why the memory was selected when Rarity walked past. “Wonder what she’s in a hurry about?” a mare I guessed was the host said.
那是在废墟里，有两匹母马，不算我的主人，正在收集罐子碎片。很明显，为什么当稀少走过的时候，记忆被选中了。"不知道她在忙什么?"我猜是一匹母马，主人说。
“Leave it be, Dewdrop. Rarity’s going to have you sweeping floor scraps if she catches you eavesdropping,” one of the two replied.
"别管它，露珠。如果瑞妮发现你在偷听，她会让你把地板上的碎片扫掉的,"其中一个回答。
My host chuckled. “I’m not eavesdropping. I’m collecting pot shards.” And she happened to be collecting them very quickly in the direction the white mare had gone.
主人咯咯地笑了起来。"我没有偷听。我在收集大麻碎片。"她碰巧正朝那匹白色的母马走去的方向很快地把它们收集起来。
Rarity trotted along through the buried ruins, looking particularly magnificent in her purple rubber boots and coat that shielded her from the water dripping from above. Goldenblood stood at one of the walls next to a hole the water in the cave was trickling into. His eyes were distant as he floated a piece of rock in front of him, turning it over and over. The spiral chunk of silvery stone glittered coldly in the light of the lamps and seemed to have him mesmerized.
稀有小跑着穿过被掩埋的废墟，穿着紫色的橡胶靴子和防止水从上面滴下来的外套，看起来特别华丽。金血王站在一堵墙边，旁边有一个洞，洞里的水正在慢慢流进去。他的眼睛是遥远的，因为他漂浮在他面前的一块岩石，翻来覆去。螺旋形的银色石块在灯光下闪闪发光，似乎把他迷住了。
“Goldenblood, a word,” Rarity said softly, but voices carried in the tunnel and whoever was remembering this moved closer. The wheezing, scarred stallion regarded her with an arched brow. “I wanted to… thank you. For helping save Pinkie Pie. If that bomb had gone off…” She took a deep breath. “I’ve never faced the possibility of losing my friends before.”
"金色血液，一个词,"稀少轻声说道，但是隧道里传来的声音和记得这个词的人越来越近。那匹气喘吁吁、伤痕累累的种马扬起眉毛打量着她。"我想......谢谢你。谢谢你帮忙救了鹏奇派。如果炸弹爆炸了......"她深吸了一口气。"我以前从未面对过失去朋友的可能性。"
“Never? Not even when facing Nightmare Moon and dragons?” Goldenblood said softly but with a small, sincere smile.
""从来没有？即使面对恶梦之月和恶龙也不行吗?"金色的血液温柔地说，但是带着一个小小的，真诚的微笑。
She brushed a hoof across her mane, smiling sheepishly and giving a feigned carefree roll of her eyes. “Ah, the invulnerability of youth… but no. Not even then.” She closed her blue eyes and took a deep breath. “But when I heard about it…”
她把一只蹄子拂过鬃毛，羞答答地笑着，假装无忧无虑地转了转眼珠。"啊，年轻人的刀枪不入......但不是。即使到了那个时候也不行。"她闭上蓝眼睛，深深地吸了一口气。"但当我听说这件事时......"
“Most credit goes to Pinkie Pie and the Marauders. She sensed it, and they evacuated the club. I simply gave her a nudge in the right direction,” he said as he turned the spur of stone over and over in his magic. When she looked at it, he smiled. “Fascinating, isn’t it? We’ve been finding more and more of this ore the deeper we excavate. Its properties and potential are astounding.” Rarity dropped her gaze, chewing her lip. Clearly she didn’t want to discuss stupid rocks.
"大部分功劳归于平奇·派和掠夺者。她感觉到了，于是他们撤离了俱乐部。我只是轻轻推了她一下，让她朝正确的方向走去。"他一边说着，一边用魔法把石头的刺一遍又一遍地转动着。当她看着它时，他笑了。"真有趣，不是吗？我们挖得越深，发现的矿石就越多。它的特性和潜力令人震惊。"稀有低下了目光，咬着嘴唇。很明显她不想讨论那些愚蠢的石头。
“Goldenblood, I need to ask a favor. I need a project. A… a secret project,” she said quietly. “Normally, I’d never ask, but… after Pinkie…” She chewed on her lip. “I think I may have a way to protect my friends. But… I need... something. Something terrible.”
"金色血统，我需要你帮个忙。我需要一个项目。答:。."一个秘密项目,"她平静地说。"通常情况下，我是不会问的，但是......拉钩之后......"她咬着嘴唇。"我想我可能有办法保护我的朋友。但是...我需要...一些东西。可怕的事情。"
Goldenblood just stared at the hard spiral as he turned the rock over in his magic. “I see...”
金布拉德只是盯着那个坚硬的螺旋，用他的魔法把那块石头翻过来。"我明白了......"
“It’s… it’s a new kind of magic. Or perhaps a very old kind. I’m not sure… but… I don’t trust it. I need to make certain it won’t hurt my friends,” she said softly, keeping her eyes on the water as it trickled over the edge and through that dark gap. “If it works, I can keep everypony safe forever.”
"这是...这是一种新的魔法。或者是非常古老的那种。我不确定...但是...我不相信。我需要确保它不会伤害到我的朋友们,"她轻声地说，眼睛一直盯着水面，因为水从边缘流过，穿过那个黑暗的缝隙。"如果成功了，我可以永远保证每匹小马的安全。"
“You need test subjects,” Goldenblood murmured softly in his watery, rusty voice. Rarity flinched but then nodded. “Say no more. I’ll get you situated. We’ll call it…” He mused a moment as he stared at the rock before saying softly, “Project Eternity. After all, forever is a long time to keep a pony safe.”
"你需要试验对象,"金色布拉德用他那生锈的水汪汪的声音低声说。雷诺退缩了一下，然后点了点头。""不用说了。我会把你安顿好的。他盯着那块石头沉思了一会儿，然后轻声说道:"永恒之柱。毕竟，要保护小马的安全，永远是一段很长的时间。"
“I… thank you, Goldenblood,” she said with a relieved smile. She started away,
"我.....。.谢谢你，金血王,"她带着宽慰的微笑说。她离开了
then hesitated. “I… I think that you and Fluttershy make a wonderful… erm… couple.” She grinned sheepishly at him, pawing at the water-covered stone.
然后犹豫了一下。"我.....。.我认为你和小弗是一对很好的夫妻。"她羞怯地朝他咧嘴笑着，用爪子抓着那块被水覆盖的石头。
He smiled, but his eyes simply looked sad. “Thank you, Rarity. I hope I prove worthy of her.”
他笑了，但是他的眼睛看起来很悲伤。"谢谢你，稀有。我希望我能配得上她。"
“Yes. Quite. Well… ah…” She bobbed her head once more. “I look forward to hearing from you, Goldenblood.”
"是的。没错。嗯......啊......"她又摇了摇头。"我期待着你的消息，金血王。"
The viewer immediately rushed back to collecting pot shards as Goldenblood looked in her direction. The image dissolved. “This is an hour later,” Zodiac said as a new picture took shape. “It was a long memory, and nothing particularly interesting to a non-archaeologist happened in the intervening time.” Well, this was an improvement over being stuck in a memory orb.
当金血王朝她的方向看去时，观众立刻跑回去收集罐子碎片。图像消失了。"这是一个小时后,"黄道带说，作为一个新的图片形成。"那是一段很长的记忆，在那段时间里，没有什么特别有趣的事情发生在一个非考古学家身上。"这比被困在记忆球里好多了。
“Come on, everypony. Last ride out of this hole,” some stallion called. The viewer trotted to the elevator and it started to rise out of the earth. It flashed by other subterranean workings as it lifted before finally reaching the top. It looked like the foundation of a large concrete building. Ponies started filing out, trotting towards the exit and laughing about their day.
"来吧，小马们。"最后一次离开这个洞,"一些种马叫道。观众小跑到电梯，电梯开始从地面升起。在最终到达山顶之前，它被抬起时闪过其他地下工作区。它看起来像一座大型混凝土建筑的地基。小马们开始排队出去，小跑着走向出口，大笑着度过了一天。
All except for Goldenblood. He stood against the rail surrounding the elevator shaft as ponies left. His eyes stared right into mine. “A minute, Dewdrop.”
除了金色血统。当小马离开时，他紧靠着电梯井周围的栏杆站着。他的眼睛紧盯着我的眼睛。"等一下，露珠。"
“Um… yes… sir?” my host said softly.
"嗯......是的......先生?"主人轻声地说。
“You heard my conversation with the Ministry Mare.” It wasn’t a question. The silvery metal turned over and over beside him as he approached her. My viewer started to back away. “What did you think?”
"你听到我和魔法部的谈话了。"这不是一个问题。当他走近她的时候，那银色的金属在他身边翻来覆去。我的观众开始后退。"你觉得怎样?"
“It was… it was… ah… interesting…” the mare stammered.
"那是...那是...啊...有意思..."母马结结巴巴地说。
“Interesting. Indeed,” he said softly as he kept approaching. Now I realized what so disturbed me about Goldenblood, more than the scars and the sickly cough and ragged breathing; on top of all that, he didn’t seem to blink. “Do you know what the three most precious things in Equestria are, Dewdrop?” he asked, and she could feel the breeze blowing out of the shaft on her flanks as he backed her right up to the metal rails surrounding the dark, bottomless-looking pit.
"有意思。的确,"他一边轻声地说，一边不停地走近。现在我意识到金色血液让我如此不安的原因，不仅仅是伤疤、病态的咳嗽和粗糙的呼吸，更重要的是，他似乎连眼睛都不眨一下。"露珠，你知道Equestria最珍贵的三样东西是什么吗?"他问道，她能感觉到微风从她两侧的竖井里吹出来，他把她推到了黑暗的、无底洞周围的金属轨道上。
“Family, sir? Friends? Um… money?”
"家人，先生？朋友？呃...钱?"
“Family is a dime a dozen,” he said with a soft snort. “Friends are articles of convenience. And money is trash.” He shook his head as his horn glowed, and he whispered softly into her ear, “No, the three most precious things are loyalty, love... and secrets.”
"家庭不值钱,"他轻轻地哼了一声说。"朋友是方便的物品。钱就是垃圾。"他摇摇头，他的角发光，他轻轻地在她耳边说,"不，三个最宝贵的东西是忠诚，爱...和秘密。"
Suddenly, the rails weren’t there anymore and she was falling back over the edge, just barely grabbing on with her forelegs. “Help! Somepony help me!” she shrieked. The glowing metal bars that had twisted away behind her slowly returned to place. “Please… I have a family!”
突然间，栏杆不见了，她往后一倒，前腿几乎没有抓住栏杆。"救命！有人帮帮我!"她尖叫着。那些在她身后扭曲着的发光的金属栏杆慢慢地又回到了原处。"求你了......我有家人!"
“My condolences, but I’m afraid that some ponies just can’t be trusted with secrets.” And with that, he stood there and watched as her legs and then her hooves slowly slid over the edge. He didn’t look away. He still didn’t even blink... The world became tumbling darkness. I shuddered, closing my eyes and unable to watch any more. That was a long way to fall…
"我表示哀悼，但恐怕有些小马就是不能保守秘密。"就这样，他站在那里，看着她的腿和蹄子慢慢滑过边缘。他没有移开视线。他连眼睛都没眨一下......世界变成了翻滚的黑暗。我颤抖着，闭上眼睛，再也看不下去了。坠落的路还很长..。
The image flickered out. “That’s the memory I experienced in the cave. When the memory ended, I was nearly dead and was fortunate to get back up the elevator before I completely dissolved.
画面忽隐忽现。"这就是我在山洞里经历的记忆。当记忆结束的时候，我几乎已经死了，幸运的是在我完全消失之前回到了电梯里。
The Goldenblood-being-a-murderer thing. I was... disappointed. I’d hoped that I’d be wrong about him. That once you got past all the secrets and lies, there was a good pony. How could he kill somepony just to keep a secret? Loyalty, love, and secrets. And a relationship with Fluttershy? How did that happen? I had more questions than when I’d started! It was supposed to go the other way around! Well… nothing to do but start trying to get answers to them.
金血杀人案。我...很失望。我希望我对他的看法是错的。一旦你克服了所有的秘密和谎言，就会有一匹好马。他怎么能为了保守秘密而杀死一匹小马呢？忠诚，爱和秘密。和小萤火虫的关系呢？这是怎么发生的？我比刚开始的时候有更多的问题！应该是反过来的！好吧...无事可做只能开始试着找到答案。
“So Rarity was… experimenting? On ponies? Rarity?” I said, now trying to wrap my head around that one. How does a pony go from dressmaking to that?
"所以稀有是在......实验？骑小马？稀有?"我说，现在我试着去理解这个问题。一匹小马是如何从服装制作走向服装制作的？
The glowing pony nodded once. “Mhmm… what kind of experiments… and how she was planning on protecting her friends… I don’t know. I know that she pursued it for several years, then abandoned it abruptly. Beyond that, I only know it was based out of Hightower Jail. Here.” My PipBuck chimed softly. “You can investigate it yourself if you like.”
那匹发光的小马点了点头。"嗯......什么样的实验......以及她打算如何保护她的朋友......我不知道。我知道她追求了好几年，然后突然放弃了。除此之外，我只知道它是以海托华监狱为基地的。给你。"我的皮伯克轻声说道。"如果你愿意，你可以自己调查。"
I checked my map and saw the blank square to the north. “And there’s nothing you can tell me about the other projects?”
我查看了地图，看到了北边的空白广场。"关于其他项目，你没有什么可以告诉我的吗?"
She shook her head slowly. “I’m afraid not. Chimera was Trueblood’s baby.
她慢慢地摇了摇头。"恐怕不行。奇美拉是特鲁布拉德的孩子。
Starfall and Horizons were Trottenheimer’s. I don’t even know who oversaw the rest. I’m sorry. I wish I could be more help.”
《星陨》和《地平线》是特洛滕海默的作品。我甚至不知道剩下的是谁监管的。对不起。我希望我能帮上更多忙。"
I gave the projection a tired smile. “I wish I could be more help,” I said. She looked confused. “Well, it’s just, I’m nobody special. I’m just staggering through all this the best I can.”
我露出疲倦的微笑。"我希望我能帮上更多的忙,"我说。她看起来很困惑。"嗯，只是，我不是什么特别的人。我只是尽我所能，艰难地度过这一切。"
The professor shook her head with a small smile. “Nobody special? Blackjack, you emerged from your stable with one of the deadliest war machines in history after you and lived. Since then, you’ve destroyed that war machine, helped stabilize Flank, are virtually the patron saint of Chapel, brought together sand dogs and ponies in mutual protection, ended one of the gravest raider threats to the city, and during all of that you were also unraveling a two-century-old conspiracy involving one of the most secretive and powerful ponies in history. You’ve gotten to the point where your whim is a major consideration for all the powers of the Hoofington region and you carry with you our single best hope for recapturing the greatest technological and arcane treasure troves in all of Equestria. If you are a nobody, then you are the greatest nobody in the history of the world.”
教授微笑着摇了摇头。""没有特别的人吗？黑杰克，你从马厩里出来，带着一台史上最致命的战争机器。从那以后，你摧毁了那个战争机器，帮助稳定了弗兰克，实际上是教堂的守护神，把沙狗和小马聚集在一起，共同保护，结束了对这个城市最严重的威胁之一，在这期间，你还揭开了一个两个世纪之久的阴谋，牵涉到历史上最神秘和最强大的小马之一。你已经到了这样一个地步:你的一时兴起是Hoofington地区所有力量的主要考虑因素，你带着我们夺回整个Equestria最伟大的技术和神秘宝藏的最大希望。如果你是个无名小卒，那么你就是世界历史上最伟大的无名小卒。"
I blinked, blushing hard as I rubbed the back of my head. “Gosh… when you put it that way…” I was still a nobody, but at least it was nice to hear she regarded me so highly. I looked at my PipBuck… “I can’t give you EC-1101, Professor. But… if there’s a way I can give you access to Steelpony… I will.” I looked at her stunned expression. “It probably won’t do me any good, but you might make some use of it.”
我眨了眨眼，抚摸着后脑勺，脸涨得通红。"天啊......当你这么说的时候......"我还是个无名小卒，但至少听到她这么看重我还是很高兴的。我看着我的PipBuck......"我不能给你EC-1101，教授。但是......如果有办法让你接触到Steelpony......我会的。"我看着她震惊的表情。"这可能对我没什么好处，但你可以好好利用一下。"
“I…” She stared at me, and then the glowing projection threw its arms around me. The light flickered and sparked, dazzling my eye. “Thank you… so much.” She drew back. “Well... if you can get to the Flash Industries headquarters’s maneframe and use EC-1101 to unlock it, I should be able to extract the Steelpony activation files and schematics from here.”
"我.....。。」她盯着我，然后那个发光的投影伸出双臂抱住了我。灯光忽明忽暗，使我眼花缭乱。"非常感谢。"她往后退了退。"好吧......如果你能到达闪电工业总部的手机，并使用EC-1101解锁它，我应该能够从这里提取钢马激活文件和图表。"
“Flash Industries?”
"闪光工业?"
“One of several cover companies we worked with while developing Steelpony. I’d direct you to the Aegis Security headquarters, but it took a direct hit from a balefire missile. There’s naught left but a crater.”
"这是我们开发Steelpony时合作过的几家封面公司之一。我可以指引你去宙斯盾安全总部，但是它被一枚火箭弹直接击中了。除了一个弹坑什么也没有留下。"
My PipBuck chirped as a few new icons lit up. “These are the O.I.A. fronts I
当几个新的图标亮起来的时候，我的PipBuck叽叽喳喳地叫着。"这些是o.i.a.的前沿阵地
know of where you might find something useful.” Boom Inc. O.I.A. Progress Office. Horizon Laboratories.
知道你在哪里能找到有用的东西"深圳市博美贸易有限公司。O.i.a.进度办公室。HorizonLaboratories.
Hippocratic Research.
Hippocratic Research.
I felt lightheaded. Places all in the northeast corner of the outer city. Places where I might find answers. A place where I might find Sanguine himself. I nearly trembled in anticipation. “Thank you. This is wonderful! I don’t know what to say!”
我感到头昏眼花。所有的地方都在外城的东北角。我可能找到答案的地方。一个我可以找到赛古尼本人的地方。我期待得几乎发抖。"谢谢。这太棒了！我不知道该说什么!"
She flushed... well, her cheeks were a little shinier than before. “And if I can make one last request… I’d like to interview all of you. I think it’s something that might be valuable someday. Ponies are going to want to know just who Security and her friends were.”
她脸红了......好吧，她的脸颊比以前更有光泽了。"如果我能提出最后一个请求......我想采访你们所有人。我觉得有一天它会很有价值。小马会想知道保安和她的朋友们是谁。"
I couldn’t think that that would ever be valuable; in six months I’d be gone and in seven probably forgotten… except maybe by Glory and my friends. “Well… I’ll tell them when I see them in the morning… but don’t hold your breath.” The projection arched her brow and I coughed into my hoof. “You know what I mean…”
我不认为那会有什么价值;六个月后我就走了，七个月后我可能就被遗忘了......除了晨辉和我的朋友们。"好吧......我明天早上见到他们的时候会告诉他们的......但是不要抱太大希望。"突出物拱起了她的眉毛，我的咳嗽声传到了我的蹄子上。"你知道我的意思......"
* * *
* * *
“What do I want?
"我想要什么？
“Gosh, that’s an easy one. Give me a box of Sugar Apple Bombs and a bottle of Wild Pegasus and I’m good… Look, I’m not a complicated pony. Really. I’m not smart enough to be a complicated pony. I want folks happy and safe. That’s it. If my actions make some ponies able to live their lives, then I’m good.
"天哪，这个问题很简单。给我一盒糖苹果炸弹和一瓶野飞马，我很好......听着，我不是一匹复杂的小马。真的。我还不够聪明，当不了一匹复杂的小马。我希望人们快乐和安全。就是这样。如果我的行为让一些小马能够过它们自己的生活，那么我就是好的。
“Of course, that means that sometimes I have to take lives as well. I never like doing that. I know some ponies feel a rush when they kill, but it’s just something I have to do. And sometimes… sometimes I’m really good at it. I wish it was as hard for me as it used to be, but I guess that’s growing up, huh? So if I do kill, I try and kill the ponies who cause harm. I do my best to make sure that nopony gets hurt who isn’t causing hurt.
"当然，这意味着有时候我也不得不杀人。我从来不喜欢那样做。我知道有些小马在杀死它们的时候会感到一种冲动，但这只是我必须做的事情。有时候...有时候我真的很擅长这个。我希望这对我来说和以前一样困难，但我想这就是成长，对吧？所以如果我真的杀了人，我会试着杀掉那些造成伤害的小马。我尽最大努力确保没有人会因为没有造成伤害而受到伤害。
“But what I’d really like is a nice place to live with Glory, a kid of my own, in a safe place, with a weekly poker night with my friends. I’m pretty sure that’s all I need. If I get that, I’m pretty sure giving whatever I have to everypony else who
"但我真正想要的是一个和晨辉一起生活的好地方，一个属于我自己的孩子，在一个安全的地方，和我的朋友们一起度过每周一次的扑克之夜。我很确定这就是我所需要的。如果我得到了那个，我肯定会把我拥有的一切都给那些
needs it isn’t much of a problem.
需要它不是什么大问题。
“Oh… I suppose I should throw ‘not dying’ in there too…
"哦......我想我应该把'不死'也加进去.....。
“Crap… can I have a do over?”
"糟糕......我能重来一次吗?"
* * *
* * *
I waited at the north gate, calmly checking my shotgun, rifle, and twelve millimeter ammo. Fresh healing potions from Triage for the next few days. Food and purified water. The thunderstorm was soaking everything, transforming the quad into a muddy lake.
我在北门等候，平静地检查我的猎枪、步枪和十二毫米口径的子弹。在接下来的几天里，新鲜的治疗药水将从伤员分类处流出。食物和纯净水。雷雨浸透了所有的东西，把院子变成了一个泥泞的湖泊。
Glory trotted out of the mist, her beam rifle shifted to the side to compensate for her missing wing. She smiled broadly up at me in her Equestrian Air Guard barding. “Leo didn’t want his gun back?” I asked with a smile of my own.
晨辉在薄雾中小跑，她的步枪瞄准镜移向一边，以补偿她失去的翅膀。她在骑马的空军护卫队里对我露出了灿烂的笑容。"Leo不想要回他的枪?"我笑着问道。
“He did, but I beat him…” she said with a chuckle.
"是的，但是我打败了他......"她笑着说。
“You fought him?” I asked in shock. Glory fighting for a gun?
"你和他打架了?"我震惊地问道。为枪而战的晨辉？
She brushed her purple mane out of her eyes. “No. I guilt tripped him about almost killing you when you were going to do so much for the professor, so he dropped it.”
她拂去眼前紫色的鬃毛。"没有。我内疚地绊倒了他，差点杀了你，而你却要为教授做这么多，所以他放弃了。"
I smiled at her. “I love you.” She flushed in delight.
我冲她笑了笑。"我爱你。"她高兴得面红耳赤。
Scotch Tape came staggering out of the fog. “Don’t go! I’m coming with you.”
透明胶带从雾中蹒跚而出。"不要走！我和你一起去。"
My smile strained. “You’re sure…” I’d done all I could to convince her to stay here with Virgo or return to the Crusaders. She remained adamant. Rampage had been right...
我的微笑绷得紧紧的。"你确定......"我已经竭尽全力说服她留在处女座或者回到十字军战士那里。她仍然坚持。狂暴是对的.....。
“Of course. We Stable 99 ponies have to stick together,” Scotch said brightly. She wore her brown work goggles and 99 utility barding. I sighed at the sight of her with the nine millimeter automatic pistol. She’d have to go through her first kill all over again. Hopefully it wouldn’t be for a while.
"当然。我们稳定的99匹小马必须团结在一起,"苏格兰人愉快地说。她戴着棕色的工作护目镜和99号工具箱。看到她拿着那把九毫米口径的自动手枪，我叹了口气。她不得不重新经历第一次杀戮。希望短时间内不会发生。
“Yeah. We have to stick together,” P-21 said from my side. I jumped… okay, I would have jumped clear over Glory if my legs were working right. My blue
"是的。我们必须团结在一起,"P-21从我这边说。我跳了......好吧，如果我的腿能正常工作的话，我会跳过晨辉。我的蓝色
friend gave me a small smile and shrug. “I’ve stuck it out with you this long. I can manage a few more months. Chapel’s not going anywhere.” His eyes flicked down to Scotch, and for a moment I thought he was going to say something. Then he just flushed and looked away. The filly dropped her eyes with a sigh.
朋友给了我一个微笑，耸了耸肩。"我和你坚持了这么久。我还能再撑几个月。查普尔哪儿也去不了。"他的眼睛扫了一下苏格兰威士忌，有一会儿我以为他要说些什么。然后他脸红了，转过头去。小母马叹了口气，垂下了眼睛。
“The Goddess shall not be excluded,” Lacunae pronounced as she trotted forth in her black dress. No gun, but we’d find some way to remedy that. In the meantime, she had her magic. Her purple eyes stared down at me coldly, but then shifted and softened as she smiled. “The Goddess is quite curious about what you will find in the future.”
"女神不能被排除在外,"穿着黑色礼服的拉古纳一边跑一边说。没有枪，但我们会想办法补救的。与此同时，她拥有了自己的魔法。她那双紫色的眼睛冷冷地盯着我，但是当她微笑的时候，眼神变得柔和起来。"女神非常好奇你将来会发现什么。"
“So she’s not going to try and make me find Chimera for her?” I asked, arching a brow curiously.
"所以她不会试图让我帮她找到奇美拉?"我问道，好奇地皱起了眉头。
“No. The Goddess anticipates that she may task another to that end. Hopefully that one will be far less… stubborn,” Lacunae finished with a soft smile as she looked at me fondly.
"没有。女神预期她可以为此目的任命另一个人。希望那个人不会那么......固执,"拉库奈最后温柔地笑了笑，深情地看着我。
I looked out into the mist-shrouded quad and the hazy outlines of the buildings. I expected Rampage to emerge any second. Any second…
我望向云雾缭绕的四方院子和朦胧的建筑轮廓。我预料到狂暴随时会出现。随时..。
Any second…
随时..。
“Where’s Rampage?” Scotch Tape asked with a worried frown.
"狂暴在哪里?"透明胶带愁眉苦脸地问。
“I guess… she’s not coming.” And I supposed that would be for the best. Damn it, it still felt wrong, though!
"我想......她不会来了。"我想这样最好。该死，不过我还是觉得不对劲！
We filed through the gate, past the guards and the beam turrets. Hopefully I’d made a big enough dent in the ghoul population that we wouldn’t have to fight for a while. I took point, Glory watched the left, and P-21 watched the right.
我们鱼贯穿过大门，穿过卫兵和横梁上的角楼。希望我已经在食尸鬼群体中留下了足够大的印记，这样我们就不用再为此争斗了。我带头，晨辉盯着左边，P-21盯着右边。
Scotch Tape was in the middle. Lacunae doffed her dress and took to the air… really, why had she bothered putting it on at all? The entire Collegiate had seen her wings while the Goddess was in control of her.
透明胶带在中间。拉古娜脱下她的裙子，飘向空中......说真的，她为什么要费心穿上它呢？当女神控制着她的时候，整个学院派都看见了她的翅膀。
I turned back, looking at the gray block buildings through the haze of the rain. For a moment, I thought I saw a white pony with a flash of red atop one building. But then the rain stung my eye and I blinked... and she was gone.
我转过身，透过雨雾看着灰色的街区建筑。有那么一会儿，我以为我看到了一匹白色的小马驹，在一座建筑物的顶上闪着红光。但是雨水刺痛了我的眼睛，我眨了眨眼睛......然后她就走了。
Footnote: 50% to level.
脚注:50%到水平。
 
Author's Notes:
作者笔记:
(All thanks and praise to Kkat for creating Fallout Equestria. Much praise and thanks to Hinds and Bronode for making my lousy writing decent enough for all you folks. Comments are craved desperately. And if you’d like to donate a bit or two to the writer, the tip jar is to David13ushey@gmail. com through paypal. Thank you so much for reading.)
(所有的感谢和赞美都归功于Kkat创造了Equestria辐射。非常感谢Hinds和Bronode，感谢他们让我糟糕的作品在你们所有人面前变得足够体面。评论是绝望的渴望。如果你愿意捐点钱给作者，小费罐是David13ushey@gmail。通过贝宝。非常感谢您的阅读